Page 3 of A Quick Buck

But Uncle Patrick wasn’t here, and Noah didn’t recall any of the staff mentioning anything that needed to be fixed around the mansion.

Whatever.

He wanted that shower.

Through the grand foyer Noah went, making a beeline for the lavish staircase to head up to his room. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw two people blocking the way.

The first was a short and thick woman with closely cropped black hair and a strong jaw. She had a teardrop tattooed under her eye and a nasty scowl. The other was tall, broad, big nosed, and he had some of the bushiest eyebrows Noah had ever seen.

They both had slick suits and reeked of trouble.

“You must be Noah,” Teardrop said.

“Yeah, lucky me.” Noah tried to step around them, and Bushy moved to stand in front of him. He was not in the mood for this. “You wanna get out of my way?”

“Yeah, no.” Teardrop smiled. “We’ve been waiting so very patiently for you to show up. Two whole days in fact.”

“We was gettin’ worried,” Bushy said. “Nobody seemed to know where you were.”

“Wow, that’s so sweet.” Noah rubbed his face. “But I honestly don’t give a fuck.” He forced a smile. “Get the fuck out of my way.”

The two strangers exchanged a knowing look and suddenly surged forward, each grabbing one of Noah’s arms.

“Hey, hey!” Noah tried to wrench free and kicked violently. “Fuckin’ let go of me! For fuck’s sake! I am gonna fuck you up!”

“Yeah, yeah, Princess.” Teardrop rolled her eyes and held on tight. “So ferocious. Come on. Play nice and shut up.”

Noah pulled as hard as he could, but neither of them were letting go. He didn’t know where they were taking him, and he didn’t want to find out. He went completely limp and forced them to drag his full weight.

“Oh, come on,” Bushy grumbled. “Don’t be such a baby.”

“We just gotta talk a little business, Noah!” Teardrop said. “Quit it.”

Noah waited until their grips loosened as they struggled to pull him along, and he was able to wrench one of his arms free. He broke loose, turning and bolting back to the front door.

Shit, shit, shit.

Phone, where was his phone? Shit. In the car. He’d thrown it in the backseat. He had to get to his car, drive away, and he could call the cops. He had to—

There was a big black guy at the door who blocked out the sun and had biceps the size of Noah’s head. He was wearing a green suit and holding a gun pointed at Noah’s face.

“Ah ah,” he taunted. “I don’t think so, little buddy.”

“Fuck.” Noah unconsciously raised his hands. He didn’t think he’d ever even seen a gun in real life before, and he swallowed back a surge of bile.

“We gotta go have a little chat with Mr. Star, and then… oh!” Green Suit smiled and leaned in uncomfortably close, his eyes growing wide. “Is that Vanilla Cupcake Squish by Lush Body? Oh, I just love their whole Squish line.”

“Uh… it’s…” Noah stared. “Yes?”

“Stop smelling people!” Teardrop groaned. “Come on, man. It’s weird. We talked about this.”

Green Suit huffed. “You’re the one living in a closed nostril world, CB. I’m embracing it.”

“It’s fucking weird.”

“What the fuck is happening right now?” Noah hissed.

“Don’t worry about it.” Bushy grabbed Noah’s arm and led him toward the ballroom. “Come on.”