Page 21 of A Kiss From Death (Oath of Vengeance #1)

H oly shit, I don’t think I’ve ever slept more sound than I did last night.

I don’t remember falling asleep, or even getting into bed.

The last thing I remember was Hade cleaning up my ear, and then it’s all fuzzy.

Clearly, exhaustion took over, and I dragged my body up to my pillow and thoroughly knocked out.

I do, however, remember a faint dream involving Theo and it leaving a warm fuzzy feeling behind.

That is the only time I get to be with Theo now: in my dreams.

Morning sun streams through my window, which means I must have accidentally slept through the rest of yesterday, including bathing and dinner.

It looks like someone attempted to bring me dinner—I spot a plate sitting beside my bed.

My guess would be on Des, her nurturing personality always shining through.

My stomach growls in protest as I eye the plate and mull over how foul it would be to take a little nibble to satisfy the demon inside me before washing up.

I reach to snag something off the plate, which releases a pungent odor from under my armpit, and I physically gag.

Forgoing the idea of eating, I decide a bath is a better option.

I feel refreshed and in good spirits after a full night’s rest as I hop out of bed.

The smell of old blood and sweat hits my nose, putting a halt to said happiness.

I positively stink. I’m still wearing the sparkling bodysuit Des made me from yesterday, which surprisingly was very comfy to sleep in.

Gripping the zipper, I slid it down to my navel, exposing more of my cleavage. A knock at my door has my head snapping up as the handle twists and the door slides open. Before I can do anything to cover my body, Aeron waltzes in.

“Just came to see if our little sparring session scared you off, since you failed to show up for dinner last night.” He takes a step inside without even asking, and his eyes widen with shock, dilating with unguarded need as he takes in my cleavage almost exploding out of my outfit.

I immediately pull my arms to cover my chest the best I can, but it only shoves my boobs up further, making them appear to double in size.

If there are any gods up there listening, what did I do to deserve this? Haven’t I suffered enough in life as it is?

I awkwardly stand there as I track Aeron’s eyes moving from my eyes to my exposed cleavage, trying to decide what he’s more interested in.

I glare at him. “Ever heard of knocking?”

The side of his lip quirks up. “Technically, I did knock first.”

I roll my eyes. “Let me rephrase myself. Ever heard of asking if you can enter someone’s private room before barging in?” I grit out.

“Hmm, let me think.” He taps his chin. “Nope.” He smiles and takes a step closer. “I think I much prefer walking in to find you in this tight little number acting all shy in front of me when in reality, I know the girl beneath begs to come out and play. ”

I bite my lip at his bold accusation. I’m not blind, and I can admit Aeron screams sex appeal, and I’m sure he would be fun to play around with, though his cockiness only pushes me farther away from him.

I live to knock men like him off the pedestal they put themselves on. It truly is my favorite pastime.

I take a step closer to him. “Is that so?” I purr. The gleam in his eyes indicates I have him exactly where I want him. I push up on my toes, leaning forward into his face. He leans in to match my pursuit, closing his eyes and licking his lips.

I hover my lips over his and whisper, “Aeron?” His responding yes is immediate, fanning across my lips. “Get the fuck out of my room so I can bathe,” I whisper as I drive my knee up, crushing his balls as hard as I can.

He grunts painfully and doubles over in shock.

I take a step back and smile sweetly down at him.

“Maybe this will teach you not to barge into my room next time. I really should have grown up in Enlightened Sector with all these lessons I’ve been teaching you.

” I giggle as I stride to the door, gesturing for Aeron to get the hell out.

Aeron gathers his wits—and balls, checking to make sure they are still attached to his body—then stands to his full height and flashes me that vicious, shit-eating grin he loves to wear so often.

Walking over to my door, he grabs my hand and plants a kiss on top.

“You know it only turns me on when you’re feisty.

” He winks and strides out the door, calling out over his shoulder, “It’s always a pleasure, Nyxi. ”

I slam my door with extra umph, hoping Aeron hears it all the way down the hallway.

Good riddance, if you ask me. I should have pummeled him harder, but my stench was starting to get to me, and even though Aeron annoys the shit out of me, I’d rather not have him smelling the awful odors coming off me.

To be fair, part of the blood still splattered on my skin belongs to Aeron, so the stench is partly his fault.

Discarding my suit, I saunter into my washroom and start the tub, turning it as hot as it can go. Vagrant has subpar plumbing, and most days, the best we have is water slightly above room temperature.

Steam billows from the tub as I attempt to run a brush through my unruly hair. The more I tug, the more it seems to tangle. Grunting, I decide to discard the brush, sliding into the now-full bath to attempt to detangle it in the water.

I hiss at the scorching water. After adjusting to the heat, I relax my shoulders as I slide lower into the tub until my chin hits the water.

I sit like this for far too long, my eyes closed and my mind racing like it always does when left in the quiet of my own thoughts. Physically, it’s silent, but inside my head, it feels like raging rapids that crash over boulders into giant, angry waves.

Hollow , that’s what I am.

A shiver climbs up my spine, and I notice the water has gone cold. That happens a lot these days, getting lost in my own head and losing track of time. Tipping my head back, I fully submerge it in the frigid water, sending a shock to my nervous system, a much needed shock to my brain.

I spend more time than I would like washing and detangling my hair until I can easily comb my fingers through my long, black locks. I double wash my body, making sure every speck of odor, blood, and dirt is banished from my skin.

I opt for simple black pants, peppered with pockets down each side, that I tuck into black combat boots.

I pair it with a white cotton shirt tucked into the waistband of my pants.

I fasten my dagger necklace around my neck and weave my hair back into a simple braid, pulling my two front curls out so they frame my face.

A knock sounds on my door, and I pray it’s not Aeron back for round two.

Walking to my door, I cautiously open it.

A genuine, easy smile spreads across my face when Winston comes into view—that is, until I see he’s holding a fucking orange…

ag ain. This time, though, the culprit has decided to peel the delicate skin, leaving it bare for me.

How kind…not.

Imagining a big, broody Hade delicately peeling an orange this morning brings a giggle vibrating up my throat.

I picture him sitting there, attempting to stab his short, stubby nails into the peel, how his giant calloused hands probably engulfed the orange, making it even more difficult for him.

But what drifts to the forefront of my mind the most is the idea that Hade was thinking about me.

“It was kind of the little rascal to peel it for you this morning at least.” Winston strides into my room, his signature rosy round cheeks perched halfway up his face in a giant smile. “Got yourself a secret admirer, do ya?”

I roll my eyes and let out a loud sigh, waving my hand in the air. “Something like that.”

He extends his hand out, attempting to give me the expertly peeled orange.

I shove it back towards his chest, which only makes him smile wider as he gently rips off a wedge, popping it into his mouth.

He chomps down hard, which makes some of the juice squirt out of his mouth to land right on my cheek.

He winces a little and swipes his finger across my skin, collecting the runaway juice before he sucks it right off his finger.

He sheepishly smiles at me. “Can’t let any go to waste. This stuff is like gold to me.”

I’m stunned at first but then relax my shoulders and let myself have a normal interaction with another human for once. I shake my head at him. “Never a dull moment with you, Win.”

His eyes sparkle with pure happiness, not giving room for any other emotion to crest. “My daughter used to call me Win if I wasn’t listening to her or giving her enough attention.

” He beams at me. “I haven’t been called that name in too many years, and it’s a damn shame.

” He freezes for a minute, looking lost in a memory, a happy one.

“How do you do it?” I question in a soft tone.

He looks at me in confusion. “Do what, little lady? ”

I nervously chew on my bottom lip, grinding my sweaty palms together, which always seems to happen when I talk about this. “Seem so happy all the time. Go on with your life like you’re okay…like nothing has changed.”

The room is silent.

“I don’t think I will ever be okay,” I whisper.

He nods thoughtfully a few times and then turns serious for once, almost in understanding.

“I won’t lie to you, it never goes away, the pain. It will dull, though, enough that instead of it being a sharp pain constantly digging its claws into you, those pangs of grief turn into good pangs. They show up as happy memories and in people who remind you of them.”

He taps my chest right above my heart. I realize then I bring him happy pangs. He said I reminded him of his daughter when we first met, and now, I know what that moment truly meant to him. It means everything .

“You need to let go and release the pain into the world, let it bear the weight of it for you. That’s when you can start to heal.

The wound will only patch itself, though; it will never fully heal.

That patch will be what saves you, letting you start living your life again.

It will allow you to seek out the happy pangs . ”

I smile at him in understanding, hoping one day, I will have the strength to let go of it all. The pain. The heartache. The black void growing inside me. Knowing another person is capable of it pushes me to attempt the same.

“Find those happy pangs, little lady.” Winston gently squeezes my shoulder, and I give him a soft smile in return.

“I’ll try my best, Win .”