Page 15 of A Duchess Disciplined (Dukes of Dominance #1)

CHAPTER 14

T he carriage was prepared for their trip to the park. It was only a few miles away, and Catherine would have enjoyed the exercise of walking there. Hannah and Hester were much younger than she, however, and likely did not have her stamina. Thus, they were obliged to ride.

Catherine’s nerves hummed with energy, as if she had been struck by lightning. This was to be her first outing since marrying His Grace— William , she had been told to call him—and becoming the Duchess of Sarsen. She might encounter some of the ton at the park. Catherine could not decide how she felt about that.

“Autumn is the best season to visit the park,” Hester said, as they approached the carriage. “The weather is agreeable, and one is able to watch all the songbirds flitting in the air.”

“I do enjoy the cooler weather,” Hannah added.

Catherine walked behind them, listening them talk to one another; she suspected that the conversation was really for her benefit, though. The girls were trying to include her in their lives. She bit the inside of her cheek, guilt gnawing at her stomach. It seemed remarkably unfair that the very moment she had won their respect, she had failed them by failing to persuade William to join them.

“Going somewhere?” His voice came from behind, startling her.

Catherine whirled around. William himself stood behind her, as if she had summoned him with her thoughts.

“You!” she exclaimed.

“Me,” he agreed, smirking. “Or were you expecting some other man?”

Her heart rose in her throat. Hester and Hannah had stopped their conversation, and although her back was to them, Catherine sensed the girls watching her. Watching and waiting to see if their brother would deign to join them.

“I was not expecting any man,” Catherine replied. “But you are here, and I must confess that I am not dis pleased to see you. Am I to assume that you will be joining us at the park, then?”

“I believe I will. It is not as though the dukedom will fall into utter disarray if I am absent for only a day, after all.”

Catherine smiled slightly. He had remembered her precise words from the day before. Although he had said that he would consider joining them, she had not really thought that he would. William had seemed far too consumed with his duties for that. He was trying, though. That was good.

“Besides,” William continued. “It is long past time that I enjoy a pleasant day out with my beloved sisters. It has been a while since I went to the park with you.”

“It has,” Hester said, her face brightening.

It was as if the sun had been hidden behind clouds for a lifetime and had suddenly chosen that moment to emerge. Catherine felt a small jolt of satisfaction. While it was true that she was not Dorothy, she had managed to offer these girls some small measure of happiness.

“And during the journey, you will be able to tell me of everything that you have been learning, while I have been hard at work ensuring that the dukedom is prospering,” William said.

“Indeed!” Hannah exclaimed. “There is much to say.”

They entered the carriage, and the footman closed the door behind them. As she settled against the seat, listening to Hannah and Hester regale their brother with tales of their embroidery and sketching, Catherine found that she almost felt like she was…home.

“How are you finding the estate, my lady?” William asked.

My lady. She supposed that being with the twins was public enough for William to want to behave a little formally.

“Adequate,” she said. “I would be more pleased with it if my husband would tear himself away from his desk and ask after my welfare now and again.”

She was thinking mostly of Hannah and Hester, but upon further reflection, Catherine realized that the words were true enough regarding her, too. Catherine could not quite say why . Maybe it was because she was so accustomed to her siblings always being about, or maybe it was that her pride was—admittedly, shamefully—a little wounded by his marrying her, giving her a night of incomparable pleasure, and behaving as though he had no further use for her.

“I will consider it,” William said, his eyes smoldering.

Everything inside Catherine grew hot and tight as she considered how William might ask after her welfare . She imagined being bent over the loveseat again, as he kissed her neck and asked her to tell him about everything she had done that day.

“How generous,” Catherine said. “You will consider it.”

“The ton will be at the park,” Hannah said. “I always enjoy watching the ladies and seeing what their gowns look like. They are always so beautiful and refined.”

“Indeed, they are,” Catherine replied.

“And someday, I will be wearing such finery,” Hannah continued with a longing sigh. “You will ensure that I am properly attired when I come out into society, right, Your Grace?”

It took Catherine a heartbeat to realize that it was she who was being asked.

“I will,” she replied. “You shall be the most beautiful girls to ever enter society. You and Hester.”

Hester wrinkled her nose. “I do not know if I want to enter society,” she mused. “It sounds as though it is very tiring.”

“It can be,” Catherine said.

“You will come to enjoy it,” William said. “Her Grace will ensure that you are prepared to face the ton.”

“Yes,” Catherine said.

Hester’s smile wavered for just an instant, and Catherine felt as though she was looking at a younger version of herself. She had once been hesitant to join the ton, but Elias had indulged her. He had not been like William, who was cold and imposing.

Elias would probably have let Catherine never marry if she had really wanted that. Even when William had asked for her, Catherine was confident that her brother would have relented if she had just refused.

But she had not.

“It is not all bad,” Catherine said. “Sometimes, it can be enjoyable being with the ton. The balls are grand and often enjoyable. The music is beyond reproach! And you meet so many handsome gentlemen.”

That sounded almost like something Dorothy would say if she needed to comfort Catherine.

“We shall see,” Hester murmured. “I rather think that I am destined to become a bluestocking.”

“You are too young to know if you will be a bluestocking,” William replied. “You have many years ahead of you to mature and grow into a proper, young lady.”

Catherine never had. She wryly noted the irony of it all. William expected her to be the woman who could teach his sisters to become proper ladies of the ton, a feat which she had never accomplished herself. Oh, Catherine supposed that she knew in principle how to be a proper lady, but that did not mean she was capable of explaining it to someone else.

“I suppose so,” Hester said, her eyes flitting toward the window.

She sounded unhappy. Did William notice?

It was difficult to say, for when she looked at him, his face was unreadable. Maybe he regretted having come along with them and was already thinking of returning to his work.

“There are some men who favor bluestockings,” Catherine said. “I would not say that you need to be entirely one thing or the other. You know that as well as me, William.”

He fixed her with a stern glare, and Catherine’s lips twitched in amusement. William might be angry with her for the remark, and he might wish to correct it later. Catherine was still not entirely certain what that meant, but thus far, nothing that William had done to her had been bad . Not even remotely. A shiver of delight traced down her spine in anticipation of something she could not know.

But she wanted to know.

“We shall see,” William replied. “I am sure that under your tutelage my sisters will become proper ladies. That does require some education.”

Hester bit her lip. “Maybe I can marry a man who enjoys nature as much as I do.”

“Is that something you favor greatly?”

Hester nodded. “I have always liked nature—plants and animals and the sunlight. The world is so beautiful, and it seems like a terrible pity to spend so much of our lives in ballrooms and corridors when we might be instead free beneath the sun and sky.”

Catherine softened. “I am sure that you will find someone who loves nature as much as you do. There are many scientifically-minded men among the ton, and I am certain there will be when you are ready for marriage, too.”

“And men who are interested in other things, right?” Hannah asked, her eyes wide with concern.

“Yes,” Catherine said.

William cleared his throat. “Indeed,” he said. “Lords have many interests and admire…many things about women. As long as you both grow into proper ladies, I do not imagine you will encounter difficulty in finding respectable husbands.”

Catherine nodded.

Privately, she did not know if the girls would so easily find husbands, but she did not wish to destroy their hopes. Besides, they might very well be proper ladies. Who was she to assume that they would not? Once, she would have thought it impossible for her to find a respectable husband, but she had.

Well, given a certain definition of respectable . Catherine was unable to deny that her husband did not entirely fit that definition, given some of his behavior.

The carriage jolted into movement, its wheels clattering against the smooth, well-worn road. Catherine turned her own gaze towards the window, watching as the countryside swept her by. An ache twisted in her chest, a knot of longing for her brother and sisters. When would she see them again?

She knew she could ask to visit them, but Catherine was also aware that young ladies were expected to spend a certain amount of time with their husbands, adjusting to new households. She could not simply request to return to her family whenever she wanted. It would be improper, even for her.

“How did you meet?” Hannah asked. “Was it at a ball?”

Ah, so he has not told them this part, thought Catherine.

William cleared his throat. “That was not when we decided to wed, but we had met one another before at balls.”

“Did you dance?” Hannah asked.

“No,” William replied, his sharp gaze flitting towards Catherine.

“Did you ever see me and want to dance?” Catherine asked, genuinely curious.

She could not even recall much about him before their marriage. Catherine supposed that she must have seen him once or twice at a ball, but they had never spoken. They had never even exchanged a glance.

“I have not thought much of dancing in recent years,” William replied.

No, she supposed he had not. That was unsurprising given that he seemed to devote nearly every waking moment to the paperwork in his study.

“Now that I know you, I suppose I wish that I had,” William said. “Our wedding was quite sudden. It would have been…less so if we had danced and conversed beforehand.”

Catherine nodded. She tried to imagine it. What would she have felt if she—the perpetual wallflower because everyone knew she was not a proper lady—was asked to dance by this cold and proper duke? It was unfathomable.

“Perhaps,” she said.

She did not want to diminish the girls’ hopes for a happy marriage. Catherine clasped her hands together to keep from fidgeting. She ought to ask William precisely what he had told them. Catherine knew only a vague sketch, that he had told Hester and Hannah she was to be their guardian and to teach them to be proper ladies. What else had he said, though? Had he claimed that there was love between them?

The carriage rattled along, and Catherine fell silent.

“I am glad that you were able to join us, Your Grace,” said Hannah. “I know that you are always so busy.”

William grunted in response. “I am. And I shall have much to do when we return home. Do not anticipate seeing me for dinner.”

“He had no plans to join us anyway,” Catherine said, seeing how Hannah’s face fell. “Do not let him make you feel guilty. He would have remained working late into the night, regardless of what any of us might have said or done.”

William fixed her with a stern look, and Catherine raised an eyebrow, suspecting that he wanted to disagree with her. However, he did not. Instead, the duke merely offered a small nod of his head, as if conceding the point.

“I am glad, too,” Hester said.

Catherine glanced at William, searching his face for any reaction to his sisters’ words. If he found their gratitude to be heartwarming, he did not show it. He was such a strange man! Would nothing move him? Catherine could not decide if his heart was made of stone or if he was merely a man who insisted upon building a stony facade in every aspect of his life.

She remembered bending over the loveseat and the attentions that he had given her. On their wedding night, he had not seemed like a man incapable of emotions. On the contrary, she had found him passionate and full of fire. Would she ever see that man again? Catherine had fantasized about him many times since their wedding night, but he had never reappeared.

“We are nearly here,” William said.

Indeed, she could see more carriages and elegantly dressed couples mingling about by the road. At long last, the carriage halted. Catherine reflexively adjusted her skirts, although she knew they would inevitably be disturbed when she left the carriage.

“No one has asked if you like parks, my lady,” William said.

“I do,” she replied, as the footman opened the carriage door.

They exited one at a time. Catherine lit upon the ground and stretched her calves, rising onto the tips of her toes. The sun was pleasantly warm, its heat tempered by the autumn breeze.

“It is beautiful,” she said, gazing at the greenery surrounding them.

“It is the best park in the county,” Hester said enthusiastically. “It has a wonderful duck pond.”

“Does it?”

Hester nodded eagerly. “I am rather fond of it,” she said, lowering her voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “I have always thought of chasing the ducks, but I have always worried that it would be seen as improper.”

Hester’s eyes flickered fleetingly to her brother, who was engaged in a discussion with the footman and did not seem to notice that he was the topic of conversation. Beside Hannah, Hester bit her lip and looked askance, as though she had been caught in the act of committing some misdeed.

Catherine was beginning to understand a little. It was unclear if the sisters found William as intimidating as she did or if they were merely overly eager to please him, but it was apparent that they did not feel as if they could truly be themselves around him.

A knot tightened in Catherine’s chest, for she knew too well what that felt like. Before realizing that she would simply never be a proper lady, she had tried to charm suitors. She had tried to be proper like Dorothy and Bridget were, but in the end, she was forced to concede that such behavior simply did not suit her.

“We can chase them today,” Catherine whispered.

Hester inhaled a sharp, disbelieving breath. Hannah looked horrified.

“We cannot!’ Hester exclaimed.

“Unthinkable,” Hannah murmured.

“Why?” Catherine asked slyly.

“His Grace will be displeased,” Hester whispered. “He does not like for us to behave in an unladylike manner. He says that it will prevent us from being married in the future.”

“And the ton are here,” Hannah said, gesturing around them.

Catherine saw readily enough the ladies in their fine gowns and the gentlemen in their expensive jackets. Hannah was right.

“You will only be young once, though,” Catherine said. “Every girl needs the opportunity to be a little unladylike, and there is no better time than when you are young. You need not be concerned, for I shall take the blame and make sure everything is well with His Grace.”

Hester and Hannah exchanged doubtful looks. At last, William ended his conversation with the footman and joined them. “Shall we?” he asked.

Catherine winked at the girls. “We shall .”