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Story: Yesterday I Cared

"I'll be there at six." I stand from the couch. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to call the owner of this company and tell her I accept her offer."

"I can't wait to hear about it!" Ronan calls happily, but I close my office door behind me.

Dressed in jeans and a burnt orange top, Mia is standing on my porch. She has been standing on my porch for a few minutes now, actually. Except she’s not knocking on the door, she’s not ringing the doorbell, and she’s not using the copy of the key I know she still has. I look down at Lezak, who’s sitting patiently by my side. He looks back up at me, tail swishing across the floor.

Neither of us have an answer to her behavior.

Eventually, I swing the door open and stare down at her with a frown. "How long have you been out here and why do you hate knocking so much?”

Normally, that would make her smile, but this time, her face remains stoic. Something in my gut twists. Is this not about to be the kind of conversation I thought we were having?

As much as I don’t want to admit it, there’s only one way to find out.

"Come in, baby." I feel her relax slightly as I take her hand in mine, leading her inside. "I hope you haven't eaten yet."

She’s chewing at her bottom lip. "I haven't, but—"

"Great.” I don’t want to hear an excuse as to why she can’t stay. I have things to say; she has things to say. “Iordered takeout."

She grabs my wrist, pulling me to a stop before I can lead her to the kitchen. I look down at her. "Ronan, we need to talk."

"Yeah. I thought we could do it while we eat?”

She’s shaking her head, tears clouding her eyes. "I can't eat. I need answers."

"Baby," I mutter, reaching out to stop a tear before it can fall. "Why are you crying?"

“Bryce and I talked after you extended your trip—two friends sitting down and talking.” That’s a confusing way for her to start a story. “I wanted to know why he wasn’t proposing to Josie, and he wanted to know how I was feeling about you leaving.”

“What?” I frown. “Why would that be any of his business? He knew I was coming back. You both did.”

A wounded look on her face takes my breath away. “We weren’t sure we believed it,” she whispers, and my heart drops to my stomach. “And I’m not sure I believe your presence here now isn’t the beginning of goodbye. I just…he made me realize there are some things I need to say to you—a lot of things actually—but there are three things I have to tell you.”

“Okay.” I’m frowning down at her, and Lezak is weaving around between us, like he can sense the tension, too. Of course he can; he just doesn’t understand. Which makes two of us. “What is it?”

“I want a partner, Ronan,” she whispers. “I can’t be someone you pick when it’s convenient for you.”

I take a step closer, reaching up to cup her cheek. The way she leans into it lights a spark of hope. “Baby, I want that, too.”

Her eyes flutter open. “The second thing. If this is going to work out, you need to know there’s a part of me that’s scared I won’t be enough for you one day.”

One sentence. That’s all it took for my heart to break. Not for me, but for someone else. For someone who bringsso much joy, happiness, and light to this world but can’t see it in herself. For the woman before me who loves so deeply, scientists will spend forever trying to figure out the depth she holds. I’m going to bask in it for as long as she lets me.

“I can be a lot for people,” she rattles on. “I try not to be, but something always slips up. And I know there are things I should fix—”

“Hey, hey,” I soothe, pushing her hair back. “Mia Sheridan, you are enough for me. You’re too good for me in a lot of ways. As for this idea of fixing things, there’s not a single thing I see that needs fixing.”

Her lip wobbles again, but she sucks in a deep breath. “Bianca—”

“Fuck Bianca. She’s the one who wasn’t enough; she’s the one who wanted to make you into what she wanted. Mia, I’m telling you, right here, where I stand, you are whole and beautiful. You are more than I could ever dream of having and if you choose me for the rest of your life, or the rest of the week, I know how lucky I am to have you.”

A beautiful, blinding smile breaks across her features, so blinding I can’t bring myself to look at it. I lean down, brushing the softest of kisses against her lips, but pull back as she tries to chase me for more. My lips move to both of her cheeks, kissing away tears and the tracks they left.

Her hand tightens on my wrist. “Wait, Ronan, I still have another thing.”

Right, a third thing. I pull back, giving her my full attention. “Okay, what is it?”

“That every chance I get, I’ll pick you.”