Page 144 of With Wing And Claw
There had been a time, she was suddenly, keenly aware, when she would have been overjoyed with the ingenuous ruthlessness of it – a strategy! A chance at victory! They lay months, perhaps justweeksbehind her, those days. Glory and praise. Strength and iron-fisted authority. What else had she had to fight for?
Now, she thought of a circle of frightened humans, cowering in her presence.
Tared, staying courteously out of her rooms. Creon, pouring her tea by the fire. Delwin, offering her grain at rates that were, frankly, a show of charity, and …
Naxi.
Sweet, funny Naxi, who’d run her baths and fed her dinner. Who’d made her laugh and made her cry. Who’d kissed her and held her and fucked her into oblivion whenever she’d needed it most – who’d turned life, somehow, into something that could be …joyful?
Naxi, she knew, would rather die than ever choose the side of the Crimson Court.
And at once nothing else mattered anymore. Because if she still had even the most minimal chance of repairing what she’d ruined, of making up for the unforgivable words she’d spat into that ghastly pale demon face – hell, even if shedidn’tget that chance – she would rather die than make an enemy out of the little menace ever again.
‘No,’ she said, her own voice miles away.
Nicanor raised his eyebrows. ‘I beg your pardon?’
‘No.’ It came out stronger this time. ‘No, you can keep your bloody poison to yourself. We’re not going to war again.’
He sighed, turning away from the army below to lean back against the balustrade. His wings drooped over it, entirely relaxed. ‘I’m not sure how to put this nicely, Thys, but I’m afraid we’re rather past the point where anyone is going to keep your opinions in mind.’
Her stomach cramped violently.
‘So why am I still here at all, then?’ It should have been a sharp rejoinder but came out sounding rather like a whimper. ‘Why not kill me immediately, since I’m of no further use to you anyway?'
‘Gods be damned, Demonbane, how many times do I have to tell you I’m bloody fond of you?’ He swung up his hand in a burst of agitation, only to drop it again with a mirthless laugh. ‘We work well together, don’t we? And plenty of people at the court respect your power and the role you played in the Mother’s council, so—’
So I could use you.
‘—I wanted you to have the chance to save yourself,’ Nicanor finished, silvery and persuasive still, as if she wouldn’t hear the glaring truth that lay beneath. ‘A true chance.’
To play his game after all.
To be another ruler’s sweet little pawn again.
Your power. The role you played.She would have killed for that acknowledgement once upon a time, and only now did she hear the hollowness of it – defining her only by the use she’d had, by her servitude and obedience. What he needed was a figurehead to obscure his own shameless grasp for power. The Mother’s pupil, taking her beloved mentor’s place; a much easier story to sell than an army commander taking a throne no one had offered him.
A figurehead, too, that he could blame when things inevitably went south one day.
‘Really?’ Her hands clenched into fists at her sides. ‘How very moving. What do you want me to do, then – lead your army? Jump into your bed again?’
He glared at her. ‘Come the hell on, Thys. You know me better than to think methatsort of bastard. Join me as a friend, if you wish. Join me as an enemy, for all I care – I’m sure we’ll get over this little spat soon enough.’
As an enemy.
Could she?
Perhaps … perhaps she could become a quiet traitor again. Pretend to have changed her mind. Warn the Alliance before the poison plancould come to fruition. Wouldn’t that be much more useful than dying an undignified death on these fields and ending up in a nameless grave, while the rest of the world once again went up in flames?
‘And if I did?’ she said hoarsely. ‘What would your next steps be?’
He hesitated.
‘Nicanor.’ Her voice cracked. ‘No more fucking lies.’
‘You’re terribly efficient at this sort of thing,’ he said, lips twisting into a sour smile. ‘Alright, then. Poison plan can’t leak, so dissenters need to be kept quiet. Probably best to get rid of the humans altogether, as unpleasant as it may be – they keep causing trouble wherever they go, and I wouldn’t put it past Inga to get word out to her sister. I don’t think I can let your little demon lover run around unchecked either, unfortunately. We’ll have to get hold of her before she manages to leave the island.’
Naxi.
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