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“I’ll take a pint.”

Nix nods his head once before walking away to grab it.

“Not that I mind, but why wouldn’t you talk to Silas about this?”

The ice chinks against the glass as I set it back down. “Silas has Nova, and they are busy with their new bondship. I don’t want to take him away from that or bother him while he enjoys it. Plus, it’s not like anyone can really help me.” I shrug. “You know she is dating a mountain lion shifter named Chase?”

He shakes his head, “No, I can’t say that I did. Then again, I really keep to myself and pay little attention to what others are doing.”

Nix comes back with Xavior’s pint, sliding it across the bar top to him.

“Can I ask why you aren’t with your mate? Why is your mate dating someone else?” he says, with a look of confusion written across his face. Fuck, I forget how much he missed in the years that he was gone. You know the shittiest part about losing your parents? One of your best friends shipping out with the military and finding out your mate is the same girl you broke the heartof. He’s only been home a few months, arriving not long before I convinced Silas to challenge Orion for the Alpha position.

A heavy sigh leaves me with a full body drop. “You ever made a horrible decision, thinking it was such a great one at the time, only to find out that what you did would forever change the course of your life?”

Grabbing the new Old Fashioned, I lift the glass dome off as the smoke billows out from underneath it. The smell of burning applewood fills the surrounding area. I’ve always loved this smell. It’s probably one of the few reasons I really order these drinks.

The look on Xavior’s face is one I can only describe as someone pondering his life choices to see if he can relate to mine. It’s okay. I don’t think most people can say that they have been through the same thing. At least, not as specific as what I did.

He seems to sit in quiet contemplation for a while before shaking his head. “I have done some dumb shit in my life, but I can’t say that it's been anything that is life altering. Does joining the military count?”

A laugh bursts out of me. “Was it that bad?”

He shakes his head. “I don’t want to talk about it, but, yeah, there are some demons that I will never be able to outrun because of it. Either way, no, I don’t think I do. What could you have done that is that awful?”

“Before I knew Aspen was my mate, we were dating. Casual high school dating. The kind that nobody takes that seriously. How was I supposed to know that the goddess brought us together for something more?” I take another sip of my OldFashioned, needing the alcohol-induced courage. I am about to confess something that nobody knows.

He sits silently beside me. Almost as if he is afraid to say anything, or maybe he doesn’t know what to say.

Deciding to continue on, I set my glass down on the bar top. “Because I was young and stupid, I thought it was only casual dating and I wasn’t only seeing Aspen. She didn’t know it. Really, only the girl I was seeing on the side knew about it. We had just won the final game before the State Championship. My adrenaline was pumping, lust was crowding my mind, and Lily caught me as I was walking off the field to find Aspen. She was begging to suck my dick.”

Xavior sputters out his beer. His fist hits his chest a few times. “Sorry, I wasn’t prepared for that. Continue,” he says as he shakes his head, laughing to himself.

“What was I supposed to do? I mean, I know now that I shouldn’t have encouraged this and, knowing that Aspen was there looking for me, I shouldn’t have gone with Lily. I couldn’t see around the adrenaline and lust to see that I was about to make the biggest mistake. I allowed Lily to pull me under the bleachers. The fucking bleachers that Aspen would have to walk by. Before long, it was hot and heavy. That is where Aspen found us.”

“Oh, fuck man. Alright, I can see where this would be the big fuck up, but surely she isn’t still holding that against you?”

I rub my hand across the back of my neck before another sigh escapes me. “I wish that was the worst of it. Try showing up to her eighteenth birthday with a girl dry humping your dick and sucking on your neck the minute the bond snapped into place.”

He sucks a breath through his teeth. “Please tell me that is thelastworst thing you did to your mate.”

“I wish I could say that my dumbassary quit there. She took off to college, and I thought I would never get another chance with my mate. Surely, she would find some guy that would show her the world she deserved and I would never hold a candle to them. I couldn’t blame her. The winter after she left for college, she came home to visit. Of course, Willow and Hazel decided we should have a party to celebrate. I might have shown up with another woman.”

His pint glass slams down on the bar top as his mouth hangs open in shock. “You are a fucking dumbass. I don’t even understand how you are getting all these girls into your bed at this rate.”

“Getting them in my bed isn’t hard. I offer them exactly what they are looking for, say all the right things, and bam! They are putty in my hands. We aren’t talking about a lot of work since there are no strings involved. It’s just sex and they go on their way.”

Xavior is still staring at me.

I swipe my hand across my forehead, nose, and mouth. “Do I have something on my face?”

“No, I just can’t believe the things coming out of your mouth. I’m staring because the way you talk about women is demeaning. Why am I here, Rick?”

I know he is getting agitated, and I don’t blame him. I have been a complete ass, not only to these women, but especially toward Aspen. It’s time to put that all behind me and hopefully win my mate over.

“I know I fucked up in the past. You are here because I need help winning my mate over. How do I get her to forgive me?” I paused before admitting, “I should probably also mention that I showed up yesterday at Find Me Between the Pages, where she works, and demanded she give in to the mating.” I drop my head and close my eyes.

After a few moments of Xavior not saying anything, I finally lift my head to see him glaring at the sign behind Nix. “Say something, Xav.”