Page 76

Magnum looks our way, no doubt hearing his name. The back of my neck burns.
“We’ll just do everything in my apartment.”
“Oh,” I say, nerves reaching up to bite me. Being alone with Johnny still isn’t on my to-do list. I don’t know how he’ll act. He says dinner and a movie, but does he really mean foreplay before hitting the sheets?
“Come on,” he says, oblivious to the war I’m having with myself. He stands from the bench first and offers me his hand. “You can take a shower at my place.”
Brawler, Oscar, and Magnum glare at us. Their heated gazes chip away at my armor. I can’t even look back at them because I’m afraid all the feelings I have will show on my face and all Johnny has to do is look.
Brawler speaks up. “Didn’t you want to get your wrist checked out?” he throws out there.
“What happened to your wrist?” Johnny asks, concern twisting his features.
I lick my lips, still avoiding the gazes of the other guys in the room. “I may have bruised it, that’s all.”
“I’ll make sure you ice it.”
“I thought we were going over last-minute shit,” Oscar says, agitation lacing his voice.
They’re trying their damndest to get me out of this.
Johnny stills. Oscar’s question makes the soft, approachable Johnny leave. In its place stands the guy who’s not to be second-guessed. “Big Daddy K prepped me earlier, Bat.” He spits out Oscar’s nickname like it’s a curse.
I don’t dare look, but whatever motion Oscar makes seems to appease Johnny for the moment. He puts his hand around me and guides me toward the side entrance.
“Mag,” he calls out, his voice slicing through the tension in the air. But Magnum already understood what was happening. He reaches the exit door before us and holds it open. He goes from sparring partner to guard at the drop of a hat.
Johnny draws lines over my fingers and knuckles the whole time we’re in the car. Drenched in my own sweat, I’m acutely aware of what I must look and feel like, but I don’t move away. Training again has me feeling on top of the world. Like I can conquer anything. This is why I love to fight. It’s having power within yourself. Faith in yourself that you could protect yourself if it came right down to it.
There were so many times I wished my parents had taken a self-defense class orsomething. Maybe things would’ve ended differently if they had. Bullets win over fists every time, and you can’t stop madness, but at least you can try. At least there might be a flicker of hope.
“What are you thinking about?” Johnny asks.
My parents. The ones your father killed.
For a moment, I imagine what would happen if I actually said that. Johnny can be so sweet. At first, I see him caring and loving, but the second he puts two and two together, that I’m not here to worship his father like everyone else but to take him out, I’m done for. For Johnny, it’s the Crew all the way.
“The fight,” I lie. I turn in my seat to face him. “Do you think I can win?”
Uncertainty crosses his features, but his stare is steadfast. It’s such a mixed message that I don’t know how to take it.
I start to pull away from him, but he stops me with a steady grip on my fingers. “I do,” he says.
“Good,” I tell him, still trying to get a gauge on his reaction. It’s not what I expected. “Because I’m going to.”
“I don’t want to talk about the fight tonight.” Johnny leans back in the seat to look out the window. “I just want this to be about you and me.”
“Dinner and a movie?”
He nods tightly, and it’s obvious something has affected him. Whether it was my question or if he’s distracted about something, I’m not sure.
Magnum pulls the car into the lower parking leveland parks near the same door we did last time. I don’t like being here. As soon as I get out of the car, my stomach tightens. I place my palm over it, worried I’m going to be sick the whole time.
Johnny puts his hand on my back and steers me toward the elevator. We get in with Magnum who turns the other way to give us privacy. The sweat marks on his back dip low and a feeling of pride washes over me. I’m glad I can give someone like Magnum a workout.
“Doyouthink I can win?” I ask Magnum.
Magnum’s shoulders bunch. He peeks over at us, gaze hard. He reaches up to scratch his scruff, but whatever he was going to say is cut off by Johnny.