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What I can’t tell her, or anyone, is that after I was in the hospital, Kyle was up my ass worse than ever, worried he’d lose his paycheck. My mental instability and addiction made it easier for him to control me, and I wasn’t bringing Aurora back into that.
I only broke my vow to distance myself when I saw her with Ethan, and I had been drinking. Through it all, I never stopped. Why would I? My life was more miserable than ever.
Until Ethan.
Until he restructured the team, put Kyle in his place, and gave me hope.
Now, it’s all being ripped away from me. Again. “My life is empty without you. I understand what you need and want to give it to you, but I don’t know how without losing my fucking mind.”
She stays silent and, lost in thought, I watch the city go by.
Her fingernails graze my scalp. “It’s golden,” she plays with my hair and mumbles.
She hums the lyrics, “All of you, all of me, intertwined,” a song more about her than me. It’s everything she is to me, and I shut my eyes and focus on her soft voice. “Daylight, daylight, daylight,” she sings.
My rigid muscles relax, and I can breathe easy again. I’m no longer drowning.
When she speaks, she doesn’t mention my confession or my meltdown. One thing I love about Aurora is her big heart. Believe me, I know I don’t deserve it.
“What if you were more involved? Come home with me. Meet with my agent. I’m sure she knows I’m pregnant by now. She’s called several times. Be there with me. We planned to do this fake dating charade anyhow.”
I steer clear of situations and places I can’t control, especially when it comes to Aurora. That aspect of me remains unchanged; I’ve simply discovered more effective strategies.
Exhibit A: The house and penthouse I purchased to corral her into a living environment dependent on me. Again.
Exhibit B: The bodyguard I hired to oversee any other area of Aurora’s life I’m not privy to. I’ve also done something similar in the past without Aurora knowing
Yeah, I’ve yet to learn some lessons—perhaps never will—and her letting me have a say in her career gives me the sense of control I need right now.
Because I don’t have a choice. She’s going to New York either way.
“Fine, but Ricky goes with you, and you agree to move into the Santa Monica house.”
Sitting up, she cocks her head to the side, her gaze twinkling with mischief. “What bedroom do I get?”
Her sinful eyes and smile drag me out of my dark mood. “Whichever one I’m in.”
Of course, Ethan has to chime in. “I hope you plan on getting a bigger bed.”
“I hope you plan on seeing a lot of my dick.”
THIRTY-THREE
AURORA
This meetingwith my agent is an absolute clusterfuck. I regret pulling on my big girl panties and gathering everyone in a room, virtual or otherwise, to hash everything out. Luckily, Felicity, the public relations wizard that she is, handles my pregnancy, the bickering between Jackson and Emily, and the addition of Ricky with ease.
“I refuse to be involved in anything where this giant dick is in control.” Emily nods toward Jax.
“Emily,” Felicity says. “I understand this is difficult for you, but the reality is, Aurora is my client, and she chooses to have Jackson involved as her partner. It’s phenomenal for publicity, and unfortunately, you’ll have to take it or leave it. Jackson is here to stay.”
We’re seated on the couch in my small, shared condo, and I intertwine my fingers with Jax’s. Ricky stands behind us, arms crossed over his broad chest. Emily is in a chair beside me while Felicity is on the laptop positioned on the coffee table between us.
A tight, unnatural smile stretches across Emily’s lips, her eyes cold. “Ishe here to stay?”
“Yes, Em.”
After Jackson’s confession, my mind is made up. I’m not backing down from this. If this is what he needs, I’m seeing it through. We can work this out.