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"Yep. It's like a switch flipped. Something wasn't right. He shut me out, didn't really have much to do with Gus even after he was born. He didn't do any of that doting husband crap. Never wanted to rub my belly or feel the baby move. He disappeared for hours at the hospital. Dad said he just needed a moment. That things are different for men."

Bull-fucking-shit. But leave it to our dad to think that way and give Julien a pass. "Likeyoudidn't need a moment. What the fuck, Karis?" And she just put up with it all.

She shrugged. "I kept hoping the switch would flip back. That he'd wake up one day the man I used to know. That he'd suddenly love our kid."

I flinched and held Gus more carefully, rubbing his back, running my finger over his chubby cheek. How could anyone not love this kid? He wasn't mine and I'd fight anyone who hurt him. "We love you, bud. You'll always be loved."

"Maybe that's why I stuck it out. I had all of you to fall back on. I was never not loved. It was just my husband who didn't want me anymore."

Or maybe she was just following our parents’ example: stick it out no matter how miserable you get. "Well, I'm here as long as you need me."

She smiled sadly. "And then, like Mary Poppins, you'll blow away with the wind."

"Karis. Don't guilt me. Please."

She shrugged. "Mom and Dad have been fighting less. I think they're too tired to fight."

"They do look tired. Minna graduates in June." And then all their kids would be adults, whatever that meant.

"That's part of why I asked you to come home. I don't want them to take Julien's place."

Because that's exactly what they would do. They'd step in as full-time childcare. Hell, they probably told her to move back home. It was the perfect way to refill some bedrooms and keep on living the way they always had, which is what they preferred. Just two heads buried in the sand, making each other miserable, refusing to change—or let anyone else change.

"What do you want? What am I signing up for?" Not that it really mattered. I just wanted to know what the road ahead looked like.

She sighed. "I want to be independent. I think moving back home would actually kill me. Slowly, but still."

"You're back to teaching?" Karis ended up quitting when she was pregnant. She had complications and Julien wanted her home and unstressed. Said he would take care of all the bills.

Now I wondered if it was just an excuse to work all the time.

"I am. And I love it. The only thing that sucks is missing this chunk all day long while I'm with other people's kids."

"So I'm your babysitter?"

"Not at all! You're my support system. Reesa runs a preschool-daycare thing in town. Gus goes there during the week."

"But you don't want Mom doing the emergency pick-ups, sick days, or anything else." Our mother had a way of taking over everything and then making you think you owed her for it.

"Exactly. I need to build a buffer. Train her."

Karis could try. "I gotta tell you sis, you sound like you're a lot more pulled together than the last time we talked. You almost sound happy about the divorce." I wanted to suck the words right back into my mouth, but it was too late.

Karis burst into tears. "I'm not. I'm really, really not."

I slid over, tucking her into my side while I adjusted Gus closer to the other side. "Shit, I'm sorry. You're doing a great job. I love you."

"I know you do, you stupid lug." Her tears soaked my shirt. "It's so hard. And I'm so lonely. And I swear everyone is gossiping about me."

"I've just been told I'm actually the hot topic of the moment."

That got her to laugh. "That's true," she said between sniffles. "And you better watch out. Maeve Applebottom already has plans for you."

Well, that was the worst kind of news. "Who is she setting me up with?"

"I believe her first choice is Caroline Tiernan."

Caroline was a very sweet girl, but she was five years younger than me and I had never once looked at her twice. "I'll be on the lookout."