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“And there was no sign of them?”
“No,” I say, my voice cracking. “Nothing.”
Flynn flips to a new page in his notebook even though what I’ve told him amounts to only a few measly sentences.
“Why did you go to the lake?”
Confusion rolls over me again. Does he mean now? Fifteen years ago?
“I don’t understand the question,” I say.
“Mrs. Harris-White told me they found you standing in the lake this morning. After you realized the girls in your cabin were missing. Did you think they’d be there?”
I barely remember that moment. I recall seeing the sun rise over the lake. That first blush of daylight. It drew me to it.
Flynn persists. “Did you have some reason to think the girls had gone swimming?”
“They can’t swim. At least, I don’t think they can.”
I remember one of them telling me that. Krystal? Or was it Sasha? Now that I think about it, I don’t recall seeing any of them actually go into the water.
“I just thought they might be there,” I say. “Standing in the lake.”
“The wayyouwere standing in the lake?”
“I don’t know why I did that.”
The sound of my voice makes me cringe. I sound so weak, so confused. Pain nudges my temples, making it hard to think.
“Mrs. Harris-White also said you were screaming.”
ThatI remember. In fact, I can still hear my cries streaking across the water. I can still see that heron startled into flight.
“I was.”
“Why?”
“Because I was scared,” I say.
“Scared?”
“Wouldn’t you be? If you woke up and everyone else in your cabin was gone?”
“I’d be worried,” Flynn says. “I don’t think I’d scream.”
“Well, I did.”
Because I knew what was going on. I was stupid enough to come back here, and now it’s happening again.
Detective Flynn flips to a fresh page. “Is there a chance you screamed for another reason?”
“Such as?”
“I don’t know. Maybe out of guilt.”
I shift in my seat, discomfited by Flynn’s tone. I detect slight mistrust, a sliver of suspicion.
“Guilt?” I say.