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Had they stayed on T? There was something about the set of their jaw. More angular. I wasn’t about to ask, obviously, but I wondered. I remembered they complained about access to gender affirming care.

“It’s fine. Believe it or not, you’re the first person to recognize me since I moved here.”

That, I did not expect. “Because you moved in yesterday?”

I mean, even if they’d ridden off Ben’s followers and had appeared in many of his videos, they’d never really reached his levels of fame. I was aware. But… Still. I wouldn’t have assumed they were that niche.

Claude laughed. Their voice was definitely deeper than I remembered. Not too much—others may not have even noticed—but I did.

“A few months ago. A PR agency gave me a chance as an intern, and I needed the change.”

I nodded. It made sense that they’d do something marketing-related. “I work as a financial advisor.”

What didn’t make sense was why I thought sharing that piece of information was called for.

Could I just bang my head against the table and end this conversation—which had barely started?

Thankfully—or not—Claude just smirked. “I used to have one of those.”

“Oh yeah?”

I wanted to say I didn’t squeak like a hormonal teenager caught doing something she shouldn’t have been doing. Chances were I didn’t sound like a functional adult, though.

“Well, he was Ben’s, but he let me borrow him.” Their nose wrinkled then. I zeroed in on the action. They looked so young and careless when they did that. It made sense, though. One of my favorite things about Claude’s videos was the dichotomy between their dry humor and the expressive facial expressions. “I hated it.”

“I’m sure I have clients who share that sentiment.”

Great line, Arlene. Good job.

Claude laughed again, so that was… good, though, wasn’t it? I really should’ve made more of an effort in all those bars when Dylan offered to be my wingman. First impressions, first conversations? Not my thing.

Never had been, and it only got worse with age.

“Did you wanna keep talking? I just ordered fries, and I asked for extra, but I probably won’t be able to finish them.”

“Uh, sure. Okay.”

Needless to say, I was in shock, but… Claude, my stupid Internet crush for more reasons than I could count, was asking me to share fries with them.

No, I was not hungry. I did not care.

Even if those hormone-inducing feelings weren’t there, Claude was interesting. There were so many things I wanted to ask, to talk about. I’d always been fascinated by the world they used to live in.

“Great.” As they stood up, they spared a glance in Cin’s direction. “I’m also saving you from their spiel to join the local kink club. It’s a whole thing.”

“Huh?”

“Unless you were interested?” Claude tilted their head to the side, looking me up and down. Yeah, imploding was definitely on the menu for today. “I’m sorry. I people watch a lot, and you didn’t look completely comfortable. I assumed?—”

“No, it’s fine.” I stopped them from talking for two reasons. One, it wasn’t completely true. Two, I didn’t want to risk Cin overhearing or getting the wrong idea. They’d been so nice, and my being overwhelmed was… well, a me problem. “They already wanted to know if I’ll be coming back.”

“Will you?”

They started leading the way to their table as they spoke.

“Probably,” I admitted. “Maybe if I get my roommate to join me.”

Claude seemed to regard me for a second. “You’re one of those people who need a clutch, aren’t you?”