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He bends down, and there’s a crinkling sound as he reaches into his pants on the floor. “I just want you to do it first,” he says as he rolls the condom onto his slick cock. “And I want you to look at me while I bury my cock inside of you.”

“Yes,” is all I manage. I’m up on my elbows now, and Eli’s in front of me, positioning himself between my legs. “I need to fuck the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen. That sound good, baby?”

I melt at the word. So simple, but so soft. “Yes,” I say again. “Let me show you how I can come for you.”

Eli closes his eyes as if for strength, then he has one hand behind my neck again, lifting me up so I’m sitting. His other hand grips his cock. He teases my opening before kissing me so tenderly a tear does escape, rolling down my cheek. When he breaks the kiss, concern is etched across his features. “What’s wrong?”

The sudden soft turn he takes has me so filled with warmth for this man, I know I’m lost. I know in that moment I never did fully recover from him. Some part of me kept burning under that anger, under everything else that happened.

“Nothing’s wrong, Eli. I need you now.”

He looks me in the eye as he slides inside of me, both of us going slack-jawed at the feel of him filling me so perfectly.

“Fuck,” he breathes, pulling out before thrusting in again. He’s gentle at first, then less so. But his eyes never leave mine. His gaze never breaks as his thrusting increases, as he’s slamming into me so hard the table’s lurching in chirps across the floor.

Then I’m screaming his name, my pussy clenching over him as he brings a hand to my mouth to muffle the sound, his eyes going up to the ceiling, reminding me we’re not fully alone here.

But then his hand is low again, his thumb on my clit, and it only takes a moment before it’s too late. I’m too far gone. I’m coming so hard I’m shuddering, my lips so tight between my teeth to keep from screaming I taste blood.

I feel Eli come then, right on my heels. He was waiting for me, I know, but he’s here now pulling my sweat-slicked body to his as he comes hard inside of me, gasping, choking, whispering my name against my hair.

CHAPTER22

Eli

TRACK:Leonard Cohen, “Hey, That’s No Way to Say Goodbye”

It wasn’t clear when she got here whether Reese was going to stay over. But after we get off my table—which I’ll never be able to look at the same way now—I’m guiding her toward the bedroom.

We pass by the window overlooking the valley, except we can’t see the valley because the snow is coming down so thick it’s fully obscured.

“Oh my God,” Reese says.

I pull her against me, loving the way I can see our reflection in the night backed glass.

“You can say that again”—I stroke her shoulder with my thumb and lean into her ear, not thinking of the snow at all—“when I make you come again.”

Reese laughs, then we’re in the bedroom and I’ve got her nestled in pillows like a queen, and soon enough I’ve got my tongue on her clit and fingers inside of her and when I tell her to come for me, she does, hard enough that tears run down her face as she cries my name, her body bucking under my face.

I don’t know what time it is when we fall asleep, but when I open my eyes next, it’s still dark. I feel fucking blissful when I find Reese curled up sleeping next to me, even though I’m on that bridge between tipsy and hungover.

I decide in this moment that I’m not going to tell her about Neil. Not now. Not when it could ruin all this. It would be a different story if he actually did something. If he’d crossed the line past being slimy, there’s no way I could keep that in. I’d tear the world apart if I found that out. Especially if it put Reese in danger.

But right now, we’re happy. She’s happy. She’s fuckingsinging,and I can’t take that away from her. I won’t.

I feel a weight off my chest, relieved to have made a decision.

“I’m going to do everything in my power not to hurt you again, Reese,” I whisper into her hair, too quiet to hear me even if she weren’t sleeping.

Then I close my eyes and disappear into darkness once more.

This time, it’s bright enough that when I open my eyes the sunlight streaming in my window is like a laser beam into my poor bruised brain. A monster of a headache is already jackhammering against the inside of my skull. I squeeze my eyes shut again, groaning.

It’s almost like I drank too much…which I don’t do much of these days and frankly is hard to do for me at all.

“Morning, sunshine.”

It comes back to me in a delicious fucking gut wallop. Tequila. Reese.