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What am I doing? He’s just trying to lighten the mood.

But as if he knows, Eli’s hand slides over mine then, his skin warm. Tingles dance up my arm. And when I look up at him, he’s not looking at Kelly. He’s looking at me.

Then he winks.

Actually winks.

A riot of butterflies dances around in my stomach.

For a moment I’m frozen. Then I pull my hand away and wrap it around my beer, taking a sip. This is not real.Not real not real not real.

Neil makes a pouty face and cups Kelly’s face. “Darling,” he reassures her. “I told you she’s hideous.”

Augusta’s anything but. But Kelly’s just as gorgeous. Still, Neil’s words seem to appease her momentarily. That is until Neil tacks on, “But did you see the way she handled that knife this week though? It was downright erotic.”

I want to slap my forehead. But Jude snorts, which makes his beer spurt out his nose. Then we’re all laughing. Even Kelly’s lips turn up slightly, though her smile only lasts a moment before fading.

I wonder what it’s like for her, to have her entire currency seem to rest on being beautiful. And to be with Neil, who I’m learning has a cringe-worthy lack of discretion and acts like everything is all fun, when life has serious moments too. From what Eli told me, Neil’s the one who ran with the idea of having the show here, not even consulting her.

It would be shitty, is what. I feel sad for her. That is, until she makes a jab at Eli to take the attention off herself. Jude laughs at that, too, before Nora elbows him.

After that, the next hour is filled with lively conversation, with all of Eli’s siblings and their respective partners including me like I’ve always been there. Neil and Kelly stay, too, Neil dominating the conversation when it turns to them, while Kelly looks uncharacteristically small. She only smiles at his jokes, glancing, from time to time, at Eli’s arm slung around my chair. Her eyes go to me, too, though she quickly glances away when she sees me looking. Does Eli see any of this too?

That this harebrained scheme seems to be working perfectly?

It’s clear he does, because when they finally leave, followed shortly thereafter by Chelsea and Seamus, I feel Eli’s shoulders drop in the seat next to me, like he’s finally able to relax. Jude says he has to relieve the babysitter shortly after, and as he drove her, Nora goes with him.

She gives me a tight squeeze before they head out, then smiles at Eli. “Have fun.”

The tiniest part of me is annoyed by this. It’s like I want her to be the voice of reason, to tell me it’s insane what we’re doing. It’s not fair for me to think that way—Nora always has my back. In fact, it’s completely selfish, and I’m so struck with guilt I don’t notice Cass and Blake are pulling their coats on too.

“Not you too?” I ask a little desperately, because once they’re gone, Eli and I will be alone. I never planned for it to work out this way—I was going to drop by, then feign exhaustion and head out ahead of everyone else, encouraging Eli to stay with a quick peck on the cheek.

Instead, I watch helplessly as Eli’s twin, my boss and friend, too, though we don’t do much on our own together, smiles and hugs me. As the men exchange goodbyes, she leans close and says, “I should be mad at Eli for not saying anything. But for the record, I always knew you two would be great together. I see the way he looks at you.”

Her eyes dance, while my stomach plunges.

Then they’re gone, and Cass’s words are ringing in my ears.

Eli lets out a breath the minute the last of them disappear outside and angles his chair to face me. I turn in my chair to face him as he drains the last of his beer.

“You okay?” I ask.

“Well, we survived. Another?” he points a chin to the server walking our way. “So I can say thanks?”

I should go. But for whatever stupid reason, I don’t want to. Not yet.

“Okay,” I say, relenting.

He grins and orders for us, then we chat a minute about how the night went.

The server’s back a moment later and I’m glad I have another drink to cool my head, because despite myself, after only a few minutes of being on our own, I find I’m enjoying this part even more than the last. The way we’re so much more relaxed without everyone around. Like I’ve stepped off the stage and can finally take a breath.

“So, was it horrible?” he asks after we’ve both had a long pull of our beers.

I consider. “Surprisingly, no. Unfortunately, I like your family.”

Eli smiles, resting his elbows on his thighs. Our knees are almost but not quite touching. “They like you too.” He looks up at me and smiles, and I hate the way this sends a warm tingling over my skin. I need to ignore the way that makes me feel. But how can I ignore the fact that we’ve been touching all night, but now that everyone’s gone, we’ve stopped, and I miss it.