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At the time, it had made me cry, but today, I laughed, as Stewart snorted through his held-back laughter.

“Typical, isn’t it? Same when you lose your job. Nobody wants to ring you in case you’re going to ask them to help you get work. I didn’t dare to call people either because I was embarrassed. Nobody likes admitting that they were let go. Thattheir skills were so subpar that they actually weren’t even offered to stay on as anything. That hotel wouldn’t even offer me a cleaning job. I could have easily worked on the loading dock. Done simple admin work. Not wanted. Not needed. It hurt.”

“Says the guy who tells me to man up and get on with it.”

“We both need to do exactly that.” He winked. “And on that note, I think the rice is done.”

The warm evening air felt almost too perfect, and I was actually…relaxed. Not only that, but the food was simple and warming, and instead of sitting outside on the patio like we’d usually do, we stayed inside, and we talked. We constantly talked, skipping from one subject to another with ease. And laughter.

“Do you want to move to the sofa?” he asked, taking our plates away like the gentleman he was. I picked up our empty glasses and followed him to the sink, placing them gently on the worktop as he switched off the lights overhead. “I think we’ll leave the washing-up for tomorrow. I’d rather just sit and talk to you.”

He was such a gentleman.

“This has been…really nice. I needed this, especially after today. Too much going on.”

“It has been. But I still have a lot of things I want to ask you. I want to know about these scars.”

“I don’t do it anymore. I haven’t for a very long time. But it’s part of who I am, and what I’ve done. So, you can see where Veronica was coming from. She wanted better for the kids. She wanted them to be in an environment that wasn’t so full of all the issues I brought.”

“But you’re their dad. We all bring issues—good and bad.”

“But most of us don’t get our issues dissected and laid out in public. Most fathers aren’t made to fight for the right to be allowed to speak to their children on their birthdays. I’m not saying that for sympathy. I know there are parents who are fighting all the time. But it still… It’s such a big part of what I’ve become. I didn’t fight. Not hard enough.”

“It’s who you’ll always be,” he said softly, stroking his fingers down my cheek.

I went back for a hug, because that seemed the safest thing to do and because I needed it. I needed to know that I was doing the right thing. That he felt this as much as I did.

“Maybe you didn’t fight hard enough. Maybe you took on some of your mother’s traits, giving your children peace from the drama, letting them settle into what they had. They were with their mother, safe and warm. Am I right?”

“Yes,” I whispered. It seemed so simple when he put it like that.

“And now? We just take it day by day and see what happens. If it goes nowhere, then I need you to promise me that you’ll stop putting yourself down. You tried. You fought. There will come a day when Constance will turn up and demand to see you, because she loves you, and the boys will follow. They will be adults and be able to make their own choices. Until then, you just have to be here and let them know that you are.”

“I know. I have Constance’s number. I don’t dare to ring her because that would violate the agreement.”

“Her coming to see you violated the agreement. I’m not saying you should, but wait her out. She knows where you are.”

“I know.”

I did. And the way he leant over and kissed my forehead? I needed that too. I needed all of this. Someone to talk me down. Hold me. Kiss my feverish skin.

I curled into his arms, right there on the sofa, our legs pressed together as he shifted slightly so I could lay my head on his chest.

“I never thought I would fall for a man. Never even considered it.”

I smiled. Ditto. “I…I’ve had crushes before,” I admitted. The words suddenly sat comfortably in my mouth. “I’ve felt attracted to very beautiful men, but I’ve never done anything about it. In my youth, I was too scared. Then I married Veronica, and it never crossed my mind to pursue anything. I was married. With children. And that was…”

“Enough.”

“Yes.”

“I think enough is a bad word,” he murmured into my hair. “We shouldn’t settle for less. We should go all in for what we want.”

“Am I…” I struggled to ask the questions I wanted to ask, just as he was clearly struggling to tell me what was on the tip of his tongue.

“Enough?” he said, tipping my chin up with his fingertip. I liked it. “Dylan, you’re more than enough. You’re intriguing, and funny, and you make me smile, and you’ve got this snarky side that sometimes comes out to play. I want to see more of it. I think, deep down, you’re probably the best friend I’ve ever made.”

“I like…that we are close.”