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“You know how much I love you.”

“I know Langston.” I chuckled. “You tell me all the time.”

“I know I do baby.” He got quiet and I waited for him to say more. "I want you back in Phoenix before the baby comes," he murmured.

I stiffened.

"Creed—"

“Please?”

“My doctor is in New York.”

“I will fly her to Phoenix when the baby comes. But, I just want you back in our home with our baby. What if I’m in Phoenix and she comes, I gotta make my way all the way to New York and I don’t want to miss this. It’s been long enough. We keep playing this game of cat and mouse. And listen, for as long as you want me to chase you I will. All I ask is for this one thing.”

“What support will I have in Phoenix? In New York, I have my girls.”

“You will have me, ain’t that good enough?” I didn’t respond just let my silence echo around the room. “You don’t have to decide now," he sighed. "Just think about it."

I let out a deep breath, staring at the ceiling. I knew it was the right decision. But I couldn’t forget what he did to our space, what he did in our space, with another woman;thatwoman.

“I don’t know if I can go back.”

“It’s our home though SB.”

“And you ruined it.” I could taste the bite of the venom in the words and honestly, I couldn’t care less.

“I did, I can admit that. But that don’t change the fact that I love you more than anything in this world and I need you with me. I ain’t saying we just gon magically be fixed but can we at least try? Will you try for me, for our family?”

I stared at Creed, taking in this man who was not perfect. He wanted us to work so bad and maybe at one point I did too, hell maybe I still do.

“I’ll go,” I whispered. “I love you, so I’ll go.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes Creed.” I inhaled a large breath. “But I don’t know how long I’ll stay.”

29

SERENITY

Ididn’t go with Creed to Phoenix right after Christmas. Instead I went back home to my apartment in the city.

The scent of vanilla candles and fresh flowers filled the air as I stepped into the apartment coming back from NYU to withdraw for the rest of the semester. It was one of the hardest things I had to do, so close to my goal of earning my degree in Dance only to have this roadblock put up.

My feet, already aching from a long day of packing, came to a halt as I took in the fully decorated living room. The apartment was covered in soft pink and gold decorations, delicate balloons floating to the ceiling. Arielle, Egypt, and Averi stood in the center of the room, grinning ear to ear, a banner stretched across the wall that read:

"Baby Cree’s First Party!"

Tears welled up in my eyes as I took it all in. "What is all of this?"

"A surprise baby shower, duh," Egypt smirked.

"You really thought we were just gonna let you leave without celebrating first?" Ari added, crossing her arms.

Averi clapped her hands excitedly. "We had to! It wouldn’t feel right sending you off without doing something special."

I let out a shaky laugh, shaking my head. "Y’all are crazy."