Page 51 of Puck Love

“Shit, that’s gonna be a bitch to make up for when you getback.”

Van rolls his eyes. “Tell me aboutit.”

“Are you guys happy?” I blurt, and even I’m surprised by my question. “I mean, in your career? What is it about hockey that makes you want to get up each morning and spend hourstraining?”

“Well, the money for one thing.” Eli smirks, and then he seems to think on it a little more. “And the puck bunnies foranother.”

“It’s the smell of the ice, the feel of a freshly Zambonied rink beneath my skates. It’s the rush I get when I have possession of the puck, and I’m gliding toward the net.” Van smiles and rests his head against the fluffy cushions. “And the thrill of another man’s skull against myfist.”

“Yes.” Eli chuckles and leans forward with his arm outstretched for a fistbump.

“Why thefighting?”

“It goes hand in hand with hockey,” Vansays.

“Do you ever think you’ll grow tired of it? Hockey, Imean?”

“Nope.” Van shakes his head. “Just like you won’t ever get tired ofsinging.”

I frown. “You don’t knowthat.”

“Come on, country, I’ve seen you with that guitar. I know you’ve been working on songs since you got here, and I’ve heard you sing, up close and in person,” he says. “Be a shame to waste all thattalent.”

I exhale. “I just . . . I don’t think my heart’s in itanymore.”

“I don’t believe that for asecond.”

I scoff and shake my head. “You don’t know the first thing about me,Van.”

“I do,actually.”

“Oh really?” I arch my brows. “What is it you think youknow?”

“You’rebored.”

“What?” It’s my turn to roll my eyes. “I’m too busy to bebored.”

“You’re bored with your safe little world, the concerts, the tours, the award shows, and you’re bored with this good-girl persona, because underneath it all, I think you’re not a good girl. I think there’s a dirty girl just scratching to get out, but you keep shoving her down and telling her to be quiet, to be still, and shewon’t.”

I hold his gaze, and then my eyes flit to Eli. Heat claws up my neck, and that familiar panic starts to suffocate my insides. “I need someair.”

“No,” Van says. “You need to let herout.”

“Why? So I can be your hockey whore?” I slam the box of noodles down on the coffee table, shoot up from the couch, and stalk toward the front entrance. I don’t bother reaching for a coat, which is a terrible idea because once I open the door, I’m hit with a blast of icy wind. I’m too angry to walk back inside, so I slam the door behindme.

I’m leaning over the railing, my body shivering and my teeth chattering wildly, when Eli joins me outside. “I’m gonna take off. I reckon he can get himself into bed, or he can sleep on thecouch.”

I give him a sheepish smile. “Sorry about the temper tantrum inthere.”

“It’s okay. Clearly, you two have some issues to workout.”

“I don’t think we have anything to work out.” I sigh. All the excitement and dread of the day ebbs away with that one exhalation. I’m exhausted, right to the marrow. “I don’t even know what I’m still doinghere.”

“Yes, you do.” Eli turns toward me. “You should go back inside before you freeze. Can’t have you getting sick too, and I am sure as shit not playing nurse to the both ofyou.”

“Right. Well, thanks for everything today. I’m not sure what we would have done withoutyou.”

“Well, don’t tell him this because he’ll ride my ass from now until eternity, but I’d do anything for him—he’s family. And I guess you are too, seeing as he’ssmitten.”