Page 87 of Not On Your Life

Are we back to that? To my many mistakes?

“Thanks?”

“No, I didn’t mean it like that, I’m just…” She shakes her head. “I’m so confused.”

You and me both.

She breaks eye contact. “I can’t go from hating you to kissing you within a couple of days.”

Isthatwhat’s worrying her? She wants this. I’m sure of it. But it takes more thanwantto move Maddie. It takes proof.

I purse my lips and rub my beard, attempting to keep my expression serious. “I suppose those things take at least a week.“

She nods, considering it seriously, and crosses her arms over her body.

“I made the wrong choice going into law in the first place, and I’m afraid I’m going to make another mistake.”

She’s wrong. “Just because it didn’t pan out doesn’t mean it was a mistake.” Everything I feel for her, every beat of my heart proves that.

She chews on her bottom lip, and I can tell she’s fighting with herself more than she is with me. She needs time. I can give her that. I’ve already waited a couple years. What’s a bit longer?

“What do you need?” I whisper.

She shrugs and shivers despite the heat. “Give me a week?”

“I’ll give you anything.” I inch a little closer slipping an arm around her waist and lightly pressing my palm to the small of her back. “But before you go, can I offer some evidence to consider?”

Her mouth parts and her eyes drop to my lips again. I swiftly move in, stealing her lips and pretending we aren’t standing in the middle of a pool, fully clothed, surrounded by people I don’t know. I kiss her how a man should kiss a woman he’s fallen for. With respect, with hope, and with passion.

She pulls away much too soon, her eyes hazy and lips swollen. “Goodbye.”

She thinks this is the end, that I’ll let her go after a week. She’s never been more wrong. “See you soon.”

Chapter 29

Maddie

“All right girls, again,” I shout.

They shoot me murderous looks, but I’m immune. I realize my coaching style has been on the rougher edge this week, but this is my therapy. I may be taking my annoyance at Connor out on them. Did I say Connor? I meant myself. Why can’t I trust myself to choose him? To jump in with both feet and stop worrying about what I can’t control?

True to his word, Connor quit his training session, and I haven’t seen him at the school either. He’s giving me time to think.

His silence only makes my brain speak louder, and I’ve learned something very important. My inner voice sounds a lot like my mother.

“Why you let him go?” “Silly girl, you see he’s perfect for you.” “Those who fight more, love longer.”It’s getting ridiculous.

The voice irritates me even now while I make the girls run sprints.

I don’t make them do it alone. Well, right now they are because I’m tired, and my ankle is still a bit sore, but I’ll hop in on the next round.

“The team is looking good.”

I turn toward the principal’s voice. He walks up to me and hands me the smallest ball pump I’ve ever seen. I brought my own about eight practices ago.

“Thanks.” I take it and stuff it in my shorts pocket. It’s that small.

“So, have you thought more about taking the full-time position?” he asks, turning so he can watch the girls run and dive onto the floor. It’s not as bad as it sounds.