Page 77 of Not On Your Life

When I went into law, my greatest desire was to be an advocate for those without a voice, those in need of help. Maybe I don’t have to be a lawyer to be that advocate.

Chapter 25

Maddie

Tonight, I’ll tell Connor I forgive him. I can’t handle his pitying niceties anymore… or the weird feeling he’s set off in my chest. And I really can’t handle my mother calling every day to discuss him. I’ve tried explaining everything, but she won’t listen. She’s worse than Crew.

“Help!” the man on the bench groans, and I jump out of my thoughts to save my client from the barbell hovering two inches above his neck.

I almost let a client kill himself because I couldn’t stop thinking about Connor. I have to get this over with. Time to set him free of the guilt that brought him here.

For the next twenty minutes, I’m able to block out all thoughts of Connor until my client leaves.

“Oh, hey Maddie,” Gunnar gives me one of his classic flirtatious smiles. “I haven’t seen you for a while.”

“I’ve been busy,” I say, logging into the computer.

“Do you think your schedule will clear up on Saturday? I got tickets to see this epic band. Wanna come?”

My fingers freeze on the keyboard. This whole time I thought Gunnar was being a flirt. I turn, watching him shift his weight while he awaits my answer. He’s a nice guy, but I don’t think of him like that. Like the way I keep thinking of Connor.

I frown and step away from the desk. “I’m sorry, Gunnar, I don’t date coworkers.”

“She just tries to kill them.”

My breath catches at Connor’s voice, and a swarm of butterflies takes off in my stomach.

I whip around and let my eyes wander over him. His muscled arms peek out beneath his t-shirt. My eyes rove up those arms and across his broad shoulders and get stuck on his face. Possibly forever. He shaved.

“You look fine to me.” The words trip and stumble off my lips because he is more than fine. He’s been hiding that beautiful jawline all this time? I’m not a lawyer anymore, but that should be considered a crime. Apparently, a clean-shaven Connor is all it takes to turn me into Dr. Suess.

I clench my fingers into fists at my sides before they try to explore Connor’s jaw like I’m Indiana Jones and he’s the last crusade.

He rubs his chin and I snap out of my weird daydream.

“I know. It’s weird,” Connor says, still rubbing his face. “I feel naked.”

Well, that is…not something I need to think about. “It’s not weird.” My voice squeaks. How pathetic do I sound right now?

The corner of his lips curl up, and there’s that slightly asymmetrical smile of his again. My heart sputters like it’s about to give out then it jolts back to life and takes off at lightning speed.

I clear my throat. “All right, let’s get training.” My heart is racing, and I need a better reason for it. “My ankle is still stiff so I thought we could warm up with some yoga today if that’s okay?”

“Actually, I need to talk to you about that,” Connor says, stopping me in my tracks.

“My ankle?”

“No. I mean yes. How are you?”

“I’m fine.”

“Good. Good.” He runs a hand over his face again. “I can’t keep training.”

I jerk back. “What?” I’d already planned on telling him I forgive him and letting him go, but… he beat me to it. Is that all this was to him? An item to check off his to-do list?

I spin away and march down the hall. I push open the door to the empty hot yoga room and lose myself in the dimness. I reach for the bar at the front of the room and brace myself on it.

“Maddie, let me explain.”