Page 29 of My Big Fat Italian Break-Up

‘Angry? I’m terrified, Julian.’

‘Don’t be. All will be well.’

‘You keep saying that, but you’re not reassuring me in the least.’

He flung his hands in the air, now frustrated. ‘What do you want me to say? I just know that people don’t get scammed out of a license without any proof. It legally just can’t happen. You have to have official surveys and reports.’

I thought about it. Maybe that was so in England or the USA, but in Italy? I had my doubts. And something else was bothering me.

‘You put a lot of your own money in this, Julian…’

He rubbed my bunched shoulders, pulling me back against him. ‘Don’t think about it. Just relax. Come here…’

I shook my head and buried it in my hands. ‘I’m sorry – I’m too upset. I can’t think of anything else.’

‘Don’t be, it’ll all be fine, you’ll see. Now stop worrying…’

I wished he understood. Julian had a habit of trying to cheer me up. Which was a great quality. But sometimes I just wanted to be listened to without him swooping in with his cape and saving the day. Because when I opened my heart to him, it was to make him understand how I was feeling. Not necessarily for him to solve my problems. Some men just don’t get it.

He sighed, pulling me up. ‘Come on – let’s get you to sleep. Remember, you have a big morning tomorrow.’

Damn – Paul and I were going to check out my wedding gown. I’d completely forgotten. What a bride-to-be I was.

‘I can’t go to sleep. I have to shoot another blanket email.’

‘I thought you’d done that.’

‘I did, but only to my test-group.’

‘Why not to all of them at the same time?’

‘Because I was waiting for feedback from my test group. In case I’d forgotten something or presented it in a way that lacked something, they would have mentioned it and I could fine-tune it to my next batch.’

He looked at me with a strange light in his eyes. Was he beginning to recognize the old Erica? I sure was!

‘We’ll do that tomorrow. I’ll help you.’

‘You will? Don’t you have to write?’

‘I do,’ he conceded. ‘But this is important. Plus, you need your sleep before tomorrow.’

‘Oh, crap, tomorrow! I can’t go wedding dress hunting— we’ve got Laura coming.’

‘Sweets, let go. I’ll deal with it. Just go and get yourself a wedding dress, OK?’

I huffed. Let go, he says. As if it were that easy. The minute I let go, things always fell apart.

Julian, on the other hand, was as calm as pea soup. If any foreigner could live in Italy without killing anyone, it was him. It was as if nothing could touch him. I’d never ever seen him sad or worried about anything. He loved the kids and me and had done everything in his power to keep us safe, and I knew he’d continue to do so. So I followed him to bed, cuddled up to him and tried to think happy thoughts.

‘OK?’ he soothed, and I nodded, grateful to have him by my side, on my side.

‘Better,’ I conceded. For now.

‘Oh, by the way, I’ve called my parents to tell them the wedding’s postponed for now. Have you told yours yet?’ he asked.

‘I hope they weren’t too disappointed?’ I loved Maggie and Tom. They never interfered, never made suggestions unless I specifically asked them. The exact opposite of Marcy, they knew their place. I just hoped they wouldn’t have to witness our downfall.

‘… family?’ I heard Julian say, and a twinge of panic pinched me.