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“You still have feelings for her?” Squinting her eyes, my mother smiled the first smile I had seen in almost a decade.

“It doesn't matter, what I did screwed up any chance with her at all.”

“How do you know that? Have you told her the truth?”

“No, I wanted to tell you first.”

“I think you should tell her, she deserves to know the truth too, Yuri.”

“What does it matter? She hates me because of it.” Looking up at my mother, her eyes softened as her smile spread. “Why are you smiling like that?”

“Because you don't understand women.” Standing behind me, she curled her arms around my neck, hugging me and whispering in my ear. “If there's one thing I know, that girl still loves you.”

“You can't know that.”

“That's why she hasn't come home in years, Yuri, because she still loves you and everything around here reminds her of you.”

“How do—”

“Go talk to her, tell her everything, you'll see.”

It felt surreal. I was sitting with my mother getting lady advice just like when I was a teenager. We hadn't had an actual conversation in years, she hadn't given me more than one word answers or plain shit before right then.

I felt like I had my mother back, I felt like a small piece of my world was falling back into place.

But I still didn't have what I wanted. I just wasn't sure she'd ever be able to see me again, to see me as the man I've always been. Because I didn't change, I only got lost for a little while.

There's only one way to find out.

Pressing the doorbell, I rubbed my hands together anxiously. Not wanting to wait, I knocked hard, making sure it was loud enough to be heard throughout the house.

I heard footsteps as they approached, the door cracking open, then opening wide.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Tyler was holding the handle, knitting his brows together. “You're not welcome here, get the hell off out property.”

“I need to talk to Gwen, is she here?”

“I said get the fuck out of here.” Letting go of the door, Tyler lunged forward, shoving me back. “Go! Get out of here!”

“What's going—” Mrs. Lieheart stopped short, cupping her hips. “Yuri, what's going on? What is this?”

“It's nothing, Mom, he was just leaving.” Tyler veered his stare, growling under his breath. “Right, Yuri?”

“Mrs. Lieheart, I need to talk to Gwen, is she here?”

“Is everything alright? Is your mother okay?”

Tyler kept his eyes on me, but I ignored him. “She's fine, I just, I really need to talk to Gwen, it's important.”

Softening her eyes, she gave me a light smile. “She isn't here, she's on her way back to New York.”

Dipping my head into my chest, I raked my hand through my hair. “So she's gone gone, huh?”

“I'm sorry, Yuri,” her mother said, leaning against the door frame. “But. . .” Pausing, she checked her watch. “Her flight doesn't leave for another hour and a half.” Smiling, she winked at me.

“Mom, why are you telling him that?” Tyler asked through gritted teeth. “Gwen doesn't want anything to do with this asshole, you know that.”

“Shut it, Tyler, you don't know what Gwen wants. Only Gwen knows what she wants.”

“No, he's right, she probably doesn't want to see me.” Taking a step back, I tucked my hands into my pockets. “Thanks though.”

Gwen made her choice. If she wanted to see me again, she would have.

We weren't meant to be, I had to just live with that. There was nothing I could to make her love me again, there were no words I could give her that would make this right.

Even the truth might not be enough for her.

I lost her, I lost her long before I was ready.