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She falls back on her ass, sitting and looking up at me. Her big brown eyes take in my shirtless figure. “What happened here?” She points at the scar on my chest, her finger exactly an inch from my skin, and I’m taken back by the sudden change in pace.

My eyes watch as she takes in the scar. I've seen her stare at it a few times around the house, but this is the first time she’s decided to ask about it.

“I was born with a small hole in my heart that the doctors hoped would close by itself. But around my fourth birthday, I think they realised it wasn’t going to, so I had to have open heart surgery to repair it. It took me almost an entire day to wake up and all I remember is Ambrose next to my bed praying when I woke up.” I smirk at the memory. “One of the few times I’ve seen him beg for anything.”

Her eyes widen. “Oh my word. How’s your heart now?” She opens her hand, and her palm meets my scar. A gasp leaves my lips and she flinches, pulling her hand away.

I snatch it back before she can get too far and place it right back where it was. It feels like she’s reached into my chest, past my little fucked up heart and straight into my soul. It’s a touch in a place I’ve craved so much, in a place so many people avoid, yet she reached for it without hesitation.

“Better than it’s been in a long time, there’s just a crazy scar left behind. At least it looks cool with the spider,” I try to joke, but my brain is short-circuiting as it tries to process all the tingles running through me.

She’s touched me nearly everywhere tonight, but it’s strange to know that this spot, right here, is the most sensitive of them all.

“Who’s bright idea was that?” she asks with a smile that I can see doesn’t reach her eyes as they linger on the scar.

“It was Adriano’s.”

“What’s the story behind that? Do you all have a spider tattoo? I saw Ambrose's hand.”

“Yeah, we got them when I turned twenty-one.”

“Do you all have it for the same reason?”

“Yes and no. Our general reason was transformation because spiders moult and shed their skin, so we got them to symbolise growth and change. But I’m pretty sure we all have individual reasons as well.”

“What’s yours?”

“Balance and harmony. A spider has to maintain perfect balance either hanging upside down like mine or on its web, and I guess it’s just a reminder that I need to find balance.”

“Do you think you have?”

“No, but I’m working on it.” I wrap my fingers around her wrist. “No one’s ever touched me here, not like this.”

She runs a single finger along the scar, her nail lightly grazing it and I shiver. Then she decides to completely fuck with my head and places her lips on the scar and kisses it. “You are perfect.”

“I told you,” I joke, and she rolls her eyes.

She lays down again, staring at the ceiling. “What exactly are you wanting tonight, Theresa?” My tone turns serious. I need to know exactly what I’m getting myself into tonight with her. I’ve already gone far beyond all the mental boundaries I set between us tonight, especially with spitting into her mouth. It felt right at the moment, but regret has been swirling in my head ever since, worried that I may have crossed a line with her.

I have crossed a line because being involved sexually with her was never part of the plan. But deep down, I know I tend to misread situations and over-invest before I know the depth I’m getting myself into. Much like the Valerie situation.

I can’t have that happen again, so no matter how much I may want certain things, I need to be sure of exactly what she wants.

“Everything,” she sits up hurriedly and comes to stand in front of me on her knees, placing both her hands on my shoulders.

I grab both of her wrists in my one hand, stilling her movements. “I need you to spell it out for me,tesoro.”

Her cheeks tint darker and her eyes drop from mine. My darling wife never struggles to hold my eye contact except for when she is embarrassed, so it’s clear to see she’s a bit nervous about whatever she is going to say.

I tilt her chin up, so she’s forced to look me in the eye when she makes whatever request she’s about to make. Because chances are I couldn’t deny her anything, even if I wanted to.

“I want to have sex with you. Everything, Antonio.”

I swallow down the nerves that have suddenly clawed their way up and started strangling me. “I need you to be 100% honest with me, Theá. Are you still a virgin?”

She rolls her eyes. “Yes, you’ll get your bloody sheets to show off as proof.” She chuckles, but I cringe at just how harsh my earlier words sound now that they are leaving her lips.

“I’m not joking right now Theá.” My eyes pour into hers as I lower her arms from around my shoulders.