Page 121

“Yeah. It was an arranged marriage, and we didn’t get along at first, but towards the end…”

“You fell for him?” she asks with a knowing smile.

“Something like that.”

“What happened?” Kaia asks, and I don’t know how to even start formulating my answer.

“To make a long story short, when we were in Paris, it was because we ran away and my father lured him in. I don’t even know if he’s alive right now. A part of me doesn’t think he is.”

As the words leave my lips, I slap my hand over my mouth. The thought has been lingering in my mind for the last few days, but I haven’t ever said it aloud.

“Don’t think like that. I don’t know for sure, but I think you should have hope.” Kaia leans back on the couch. Hope. The only thing we have at the end of the day.

“Even if he is alive, I don't think he'd ever forgive me.”

We both sit in silence for a bit, Kaia just staring up at the ceiling and me just looking at the ring on my left hand.

“I’m sorry for ruining the mood, I should probably head to bed.” I stand as Kaia simply lifts her head and looks at me.

“I’m here whenever you want to talk. You can’t pretend you’re okay forever,” she says, and I nod.

“Thank you, Kaia. Goodnight.”

“Sweet dreams.”

Yeah, sweet. I haven’t had sweet dreams since that night in Paris. It’s been nightmare after nightmare every night since then, and when it’s not a nightmare, it’s just these depressing reminders of what his skin felt like against mine.

I shut the door to my room and make a bee-line straight to the balcony where I sit most nights until exhaustion eventually manages to catch up with my body. Sinking into the swing chair, I get comfortable under a blanket and just stare out at the ocean.

It’s silent aside from the waves, leaving just enough room for me to think without my thoughts running wild. Well, that’s on a usual night. Tonight, there’s no stopping them as they rampage through my head.

I pull out my phone and click on my gallery against my better judgement, scrolling through picture after picture of the two of us. Everything from selfies taken to secret pictures I’ve snapped of him when he wasn’t looking. The memories all stream back. I hold down my thumb on a live photo. Antonio’s laugh fills the air and my heart shatters into a million pieces. Tears stream down my face, and for the first time since the whole ordeal, I finally let myself feel it all. The regret, the pain, the love I’ve lost. Everything.

My ringtone cuts my mental breakdown short, and I eye the unknown number cautiously. Pierre made sure we got new phones and new local numbers the second we landed, so the only people who should have this number are Pierre, Noelle, Kaia, or someone from security.

“Hello?”

“So, you are alive.” My heart sinks as Kylian’s voice comes through the speaker.

I refuse to speak. Maybe if I stay silent, he’ll forget I spoke in the first place and hopefully continue thinking I’m missing.

“I won’t tell Dad. I just needed to know you were okay. I needed to say how sorry I am. I’m calling from a pay phone, so no one’s listening. You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to. I’m sorry, Theá, for everything. You were right; this life is the worst thing I could’ve ever dreamt of, and I wish I listened to you.”

My tears return, but this time they’re not for me or Antonio. No, they’re for my little brother. The one sibling I couldn’t save no matter how much I tried.

“I should’ve listened to you.” His voice cracks. “I’m so, so sorry for everything, and I’m so glad you got out. I’ll do everything I can to make sure he never finds you. All of you. Because you all deserve more than this life ever has to offer. I hope you’re able to rebuild the life he took from you. Mom would be so proud of you.”

I gasp for air as I realise I’m fully sobbing now.

“I love you, Theá.”

“I love you, Kylian,” I whisper and hang up.

Chapter forty-seven

Antonio

Thenumberyouhavedialled does not exist. Thank you, and goodbye.