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CHAPTER64

Back at the hotel suite, I sit on the sofa, watching in awkward silence as Ahmet packs his suitcase.

I am no longer shaking or slurring. Winning Publisher of the Year was a fantastic painkiller and anti-inflammatory. My flare-up has vanished, and I can do normal things, like talking and using the toilet.

‘You don’t have to run off like this,’ I tell Ahmet. ‘Honestly.’

Ahmet kneels on his suitcase to force it closed. ‘No. This is best. Always move forward. It’s fine. Honestly –’

‘Kat?’ Freddy strides into the suite, looking around with urgency. ‘Thereyou are. Bloody hell, you frightened me, disappearing like that. Could you please answer your phone in future –’ He notices Ahmet, packing in the bedroom. ‘Ahmet?’ Everything okay?’

‘I’m just packing. I have a flight in three hours.’

‘You’re leaving?’ Freddy looks both surprised and delighted.

‘Yes.’ Ahmet stands his huge suitcase on its wheels. ‘Katerina and I are no longer engaged. It wouldn’t be proper to stay. I wish you both the best of luck.’ He leaves the room with a quiet dignity, ruined slightly by a belt trailing out of his suitcase.

Freddy turns to me. ‘I assume he saw us on stage.’

‘Yes.’ I can’t quite bring myself to meet Freddy’s gaze. ‘And before you throw accusations around, you looked at me the same way.’

Freddy kneels before me, taking my hands. ‘Look at me now.’

I do, seeing Freddy’s brown eyes full of hope.

‘I know you feel the same way,’ says Freddy.

‘That’s beside the point,’ I say. ‘I’ve blown project marriage. It’s your fault, Freddy. All that self-worth you gave me. I want to hold out for the very best. The fairy-tale of sparkly, romantic love and fireworks in the sky.’

‘You might find this hard to believe, Kat. But I’d much rather you had self-worth than a husband you’re marrying for the wrong reasons. Because, as I’m sure you realised up on that podium, I am fireworks in the sky, sparkly fairy-tale in love with you.’

The silence in the room is so heavy. I can almost feel it pressing down on me.

Eventually, I say: ‘I love you too. Despite all my best intentions. You see who I am. And who I can be.’

Freddy kisses me then. Gently at first, and then with greater intensity, wrapping his arms tight around me.

I push him back. ‘This is everything you were supposed to help me avoid. Falling for an eternal bachelor who’s looking for perfection.’

Freddy laughs. ‘This is perfection.’

‘Oh, come on –’

‘I mean it.’ Freddy holds my eyes steady. ‘Everything wrong with you is right for me.’

‘That’s a great line,’ I say.

‘Yeah, I have a list of them.’ Freddy gives me a half smile.

‘I bet you do, you womaniser –’

‘I was.’ Freddy leans forward and kisses me again. I don’t stop him this time. Instead, I soften under him and let go. Freddy’s hands move into my hair, then under me, lifting me off the sofa.

‘I haven’t shaken off all my bad habits,’ he says. ‘Your bedroom or mine?’

CHAPTER65

Freddy arranges the bedclothes over Kat’s naked body, then pulls her close to him, holding her as tight as he possibly can.