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When she turns to go, I don’t stop her, and when she rounds the corner and disappears out of the park, I stay right where I am.

I’m a ruin of a creature right now, not the male she deserves. Not the mate she deserves. And though I barely know where to begin, I do know one thing for certain—I’m going to be that male, that mate. I’m going to make myself worthy of Kenna Byrne if it’s the last thing I ever do in my whole, miserable existence.

37

Kenna

It hurts.

Holy shit, it hurts.

Each step I take away from Blair echoes through my chest. It pulses and stabs and makes every part of me ache.

But I keep walking. One foot, then the other. One step, then another. Even though every inch of distance feels wrong and my whole body is fighting it, like my blood and bones are still tethered to him, reaching for him.

She’s not my mate.

No matter what my heart and soul are telling me, I keep walking.

It’s done. Over. Finished.

So why does it still hurt so goddamn much?

Because you let yourself fall for him, idiot.The answer is immediate and damning. I let myself fall for someone who was always going to be just out of reach.

I’ve made plenty of poor decisions in my life, but this might be my masterpiece. The giant supernova of a mistake to put all the rest of them to shame.

Maybe it’s a good omen.

Maybe messing up this badly means I’m finally ready to start getting things right. Maybe it’s the last big fuck-up I needed to get out of my system. The fireworks grand finale at the end of the night.

It must be, because I can’t imagine anything hurting more than this.

It pounds through me like a deep-tissue bruise as I make my way back into the Bureau and grab my stuff, mercifully not running into anyone I know this long after the end of business hours.

It continues pulsing with red-hot regret as I walk to the bus stop and get on the bus, settling into a seat and resting my head against the window.

All I need to do is get home. Take a bath. Curl up in bed. Try not to think about the night Blair was there, tempting me, teasing me, making me want him to…

I stop that train of thought right there, mentally scolding myself and starting the long, long process of excising Ewan Blair from my brain. I can’t let myself think about his stupid, handsome face, or the way his scales shimmered in the sunlight that day at the lake, or the way his wings always spread and arched above us when we…

Goddamn it.

There’s a ringing in my ears, making it hard to think. A parade of memories all crowding in, competing for their chance to pummel my heart a little bit more. I can’t process, can’t deal with any of it, can barely breathe, and with that damned ringing…

I don’t realize it’s my phone ringing until I see the woman in the seat across from me looking at me with a frown on her face. Fishing it out of my pocket, I look down at the caller ID and my stomach does a little flip. I should probably let it go to voicemail, being in the absolute trash can of an emotional state I am right now, but before I can think better of it, I answer the call.

“Kenna?”

I clear my throat, trying to dislodge the thick lump of emotion that’s settled itself on top of my vocal cords.

“Yes,” I croak. “This is Kenna.”

“Great!” Kerri Vaughn’s voice is bright and cheerful. “Do you have a couple of minutes to chat about the proposal images?”

The proposal images. For her book covers. The ones I’ve completely forgotten about with everything else going on.

I clear my throat again and sit up straighter in my seat. “Yes, I do.”