Page 72

DELLA
As we drove down the road, I looked down at the little white fluffball in my arms, contented to just be scratched behind his ears. I was in love. And not just with the dog.
I glanced over at Hayes, one arm on the steering wheel, forearm muscles forming a delicious pattern of lines and ridges. And I couldn’t believe it. He’d gotten me a dog just because I wanted one. Committed to caring for it when I couldn’t.
And it had been so easy for him to do something just to make me smile.
Without glancing my way, Hayes said, “You’re staring.”
I chuckled softly, looking back at the dog and shaking my head. “You’re just different is all.”
“What do you mean?” he asked, lifting his chin.
I shook my head, looking down at our new puppy. “Other guys I’ve dated, it felt like it was a fight to get what I wanted.” I thought of my ex from a few years prior and how when I mentioned wanting a pet to share between us, he’d acted like my simple desire was such a nuisance to him, even though he worked from home.
“Kyle, right?”
I was surprised he knew or even remembered the name of my ex, but then again, we did live in a small town. “Yeah,” I finally said, stroking the puppy’s back. “He nearly lost his mind when I told him I wanted a kitten. And asking for a marriage with children was the end of us...”
Hayes’s arm stiffened, and my stomach clenched. “Sorry,” I rushed out. “I didn’t mean to throw the kid conversation out there. I know it’s still early.”
But instead of brushing me off or changing the topic, Hayes flicked his blinker on and then turned off the dirt road, pulling along a level side of a ditch. “It’s important to you, it’s important to me.”
The noon sun streamed in through the windows and filtered through the dust slowly drifting away from his truck. It was just the two of us, out here in the country, surrounded by miles of barbed wire fences and lightly green fields. But we were hardly alone, with the puppy and such a heavy conversation in the pickup cab with us.
I looked over at him, nervous, knowing this conversation was what ended things in my last relationship. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to Hayes. “We really don’t have to do this right now.”
Concern knitted his eyebrows, and he pulled the puppy from my lap, setting it on the floorboards. It curled up on my feet, letting out an annoyed sigh.
Then he took my hands and said, “Look, Della, I know I’m new to this dating thing, but I’m not dumb.”
My chest tightened. “I didn’t mean to say you are.”
“I know,” he confirmed, stroking the back of my hand with his thumb. “I also know we can’t avoid the conversation either. We can put if off if you want, but I don’t like it hanging over our heads.”
His gaze was so intense, I had to look down for a moment, focusing on the puppy laying contentedly at my feet. His white fur was sure to have a coat of dust soon, but the thought just made me smile, if only for a moment.
When I looked up at Hayes, I had to take a shaky breath. Because I cared about him. I didn’t want this to end. But he was right... We needed to talk about it.
Fear flooding through my system, I tried to stay strong while voicing what I really wanted, what I’d held out for all these years. “I do want children. At least one, but probably two or three if my partner’s up for more.”
The seconds before his response played out like hours. My heart fluttered, a jolt of pain marking each beat as I braced myself for Hayes’s rejection.
He was the town playboy.
The rolling stone that gathered no moss.
The one who never dated, much less fell in love. How could a family be in the cards?
But there was nothing but truth in his eyes when he said, “I’ve never thought of having kids, until I met you.”
The hope blossoming in my chest was nearly as painful as the fear.
“I don’t want to be a dad right this second, but if this thing between us keeps going, I’m willing to see what that would look like. I’m just...” His throat seemed to close around his words, and he looked down for a second, gathering himself.
Then he looked up at me again, fear shining in his eyes for the first time. “My mom died when I was young. I know we can’t control things like that, but if we move forward in our relationship, having a plan in place for our kids... I think that would really help.”
Seeing the vulnerability in his features, the grief in his voice, it nearly undid me. He didn’t share this with everyone, but he was letting me in. I shifted in the seat so I could hug him, waking the puppy again. Hayes held on to me like he needed me, like I was a rock for him too.