Page 97
Story: Guarded By the Goalie
“You mean the girl, Nadia Beckwith, listed in the report.”
“That’s exactly who I mean.”
“I was afraid it was something like that.” He sighs and props himself on the edge of the desk. His dark gray slackshave a perfect crease down the front. “This girl… Axel, she’s not acceptable.”
“What the hell does that mean?” Anger licks up my spine. “Acceptable?”
“From the report, I know that she’s had some kind of run-in with men on campus. I’ve reviewed her social media, the clothing and behavior she exhibits.” He looks down at me. “She’s got a reputation for pursuing athletes, so the motives behind her interest in you is questionable at best, but what she really is, for you, is a distraction.”
I don’t even know where to begin with the absolute nonsense that just came out of his mouth. So I call it for what it is. “Bullshit.”
“See? You get defensive when I call you out on truths and it leads to vulgar language.”
“You’re right,” I tell him, happy to double down. “I am fucking defensive, but it’s because you’re talking shit about my girlfriend.”
“I knew you were up here carousing and testing the bounds of my patience. First it was the drugs and probation, now it’s this police report and an association with someone who has a questionable past and motives.” He exhales slowly. “I gave you four years and more freedom and indulgence than I ever should have allowed. You’ve got five months before you come back into leadership at Kingdom, where your entire life will be set; financially, professionally, and personally. Now isn’t the time to pursue any kind of public relationship, especially with a girl like that.”
“Tell me, Rev, what kind of girl do you think she is?”
It’s a dare he’s more than willing to take. “Loose morals. Sexually promiscuous. Attention seeking, and from what it looks like, gold digging. She’s not the kind of woman that you canhave standing by your side as you take on your future. She’s a liability.”
If we weren’t in Coach Bryant’s office, I’d be in a rage of destruction. But that would only prove my father’s point. That I’m not in control. That I’m not thinking clearly. That I don’t know what I want. Because for the first time in my life it’s perfectly, crystal, clear.
“I know you’re used to being surrounded by people that kiss your ass all day long, but that’s not happening here.” My conviction gets stronger with every word. “I’m not breaking up with her. I love her, and I plan on being with her for a long time.”
“Love,” he mutters. “I never expected this would be one of your rebellions.”
“Getting together with Nadia is the least rebellious thing I’ve ever done in my life. She’s helped me get sober. She’s the reason I stopped chasing every female on campus looking to get my dick wet. She’s good for me and believe it or not, I’m good for her.” The more I talk the more calm I feel. “She’s the victim in that police report–we both were–but you can’t see that because you’re too busy judging and controlling everyone.”
“When you minister over a congregation the size of mine, it’s important to have a hand in everything.” He clears his throat. “Like the draft I received of your sermon. It’s sloppy and uninspired.”
“That’s because I’m not inspired. I can’t get up there on that stage and fake it like you do. Pretending to be pious while you’re flying around on private planes and living in a multi-million dollar home.”
His irritation flares, flipping like a switch. “I give everything to that church and congregation.Everything. Don’t you dare question my integrity.”
“Look, it’s working for you–and them. They treat you like a god and you provide them with some kind of guidance andpeace. But I think that it makes you crazy that I’m the only one that doesn’t fall on my knees.” I stand, circling the chair to get some distance. My adrenaline is already running high from the game and I don’t want to do something I’ll regret. “You’re not a god to me. You’re my father. I’m not breaking up with Nadia. She’s mine and I’m not letting her go.”
“I suspected you’d say as much,” he says stiffly. “But remember, you’re not just walking away from your future, but the family. I know you don’t care about me, but this includes your mother and sister. I’ll forbid them to see you.”
“They’re adults.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “You don’t control them. See? This is what I’m talking about!”
“Don’t I? They’re as used to the life I’ve created as anyone else. The big house, the trips, the celebrity. The mistakes I made with you,” his voice is heavy with regret, “are ones I made sure not to repeat with your sister. She’ll be married to David soon and he’s more than eager to step into the position if you choose to abandon it.”
I blink, trying to process what he’s saying. “So you already had a back up plan.”
“It’s been clear to me before the girl came into the picture that you’re not dedicated to this path. Having a back up plan is the only way to run a business.”
A business. Not a church.
“Fine. Train David to take my place, but Shelby is just a kid. She doesn’t need to get married yet. Give her time to grow up.”
“And turn out like you?” His head tilts. “Your sister is loyal and ready to devote her life to the Kingdom. She’ll be content to be a wife and mother.”
“You mean she’s ready to devote her life and marriage to you.”
“That’s your problem, Axel.” He shakes his head. “I release you from your obligations and you don’t like it. I tell you to get focused and you rebel. Nothing makes you happy.”
If anything, leadership, but I’m still worried about Shelby. She’s too young for this kind of commitment. She needs to grow up, experience the world, get an education outside of our father’s teachings. That will never happen if I walk away. I’m the only thing standing between her and a suffocating life.
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