Page 16

“Oh my god.” I drop my face to my hands. “What the hell have I done?”

Next to me, Axel’s hand shifts beneath the sheet, clearly adjusting himself, and then he stretches back, propping an elbow behind his head. I peek over at him and get an eyeful of the ridiculously hard-packed muscle that makes up his upper body. Last night wasn’t the first time I’ve seen him shirtless, but it was the first time I knew what all that smooth skin felt like under my hands. What it tasted like.

No.

“Are you talking about us fucking?” he asks, drawing that hand out from under the sheet and resting it on the tattooless spot on his lower abdomen.

“Don’t say that.” I wince and hop out of the bed. “Please don’t say that ever again.”

“That we fucked? How come?” His eyes roam over my body and I get the distinct feeling he’s remembering what I looked like bare as much as I am about him. I lunge for a pair of flannel pants on the floor and tug them on quickly. “It was pretty awesome, right?”

“Wrong,” I say, keeping my voice low. If Twyler finds us…

Epically fucked, times a million.

“It was a mistake, that’s all. A complete lapse in judgment.” He’s been sweet. I was vulnerable. And yes, I agreed to it. I wanted it, but… I grab his jeans off the floor and toss them to him. “Get dressed.Quietly.”

“It didn’t feel like a mistake when you were getting a mustache ride last night, T.”

My lady parts tingle at the memory and I really wish the flare of heat didn’t rush to my cheeks, but my mind isn’t in control ofmy body right now. Obviously. “Can you just not? And get up. Youhaveto go.”

He shrugs, but he’s wearing that smug expression that says he knows I think he’s hot. And dammit. Of course I think he’s hot. Who wouldn’t? I throw his T-shirt at him as he slings his bare legs over the side of the bed and stands. I turn away, but not before I catch sight of his rock-hard ass. Damn. I bet I could bounce a quarter off those cheeks.

“Why are you freaking out?” he asks, fumbling with fabric. “We’re two extremely hot, completely sober, consenting adults that had a little bit of fun.” I hear his zipper and determine it’s safe to turn around. I was half right. His pants are on, but he’s got his shirt in his hand, and my knees wobble. I grip the back of the desk chair as he lifts the shirt over his head and continues. “I asked for a chance to prove myself to you and I think I did a pretty damn good job of it.”

Too good of a job, I think, but don’t say.

“I don’t get what’s the big deal,” he continues, “I mean, if anything, we should get back in bed and do it again.”

“It’s a big deal because last night I–no,we–toasted to not fucking up anymore. And part of not fucking up for me, is doing this.” I wave my hand in a vague motion between us. “Chasing jerseys. Sleeping with athletes I barely know.”

Betraying a promise to my best, and only, friend.

“You didn’t chase me, T.” He lowers the shirt down his body, covering up the tats and muscle. I toss him his shoes, one after the other and he deftly catches them mid air, before sitting on the end of the bed to put them on. “You wanted to take back a little control and I gave you that opportunity.” He wedges his foot into one shoe. “And we know each other a hell of a lot more than anyone would realize.”

“Which makes it worse for me,” I blurt. “If I could make you black that out, I’d be good with it.”

“Why?” He ties the second shoe and stands.

“Because it’s humiliating,” I admit, picking up his hockey jacket from off the messy pile of clothes on the pink chair in the corner of the room. “You’ve seen me at rock bottom. You’re a witness to the lowest, most embarrassing moment of my life. Every time you look at me, it’s filled with pity, and it makes me feel like shit all over again.”

Before he can respond, I hear the fan shut off, and the bathroom door open. I hold up my hand and give Axel a pleading look. His mouth forms a thin, hard, line but he stays quiet.

“Nadia, you here?” Twyler’s voice is followed by a soft tap on the door. The handle turns, but it catches. Thank god I had the awareness to lock the door.

“Yeah, I’m up,” I call, stomach twisting with the fear of being caught.

“Oh good, I’m out of the shower.”

Her shadow shifts under the door and this is just too awkward. Twyler asked one thing of me when she started working with the hockey team–to leave the guys alone so it wouldn’t make it awkward for her. Although she isn’t working with them anymore, she is dating the captain, and the rule still applies.

I give Axel a hard look and gesture for him to be quiet, then unlock the door and crack it open, filling the space with my body. She’s in Reese’s team hoodie, with her hair wrapped up in a towel.

“Reese and I are meeting at the dining hall for breakfast, if you want to come join us.”

“Yeah, that sounds good. Let me get ready.”

“Twenty minutes?” her head tilts in question. We both know it’ll be thirty, but I nod in agreement and shut the door. I exhale, and turn, pressing my back to the door. When I look back at Axel his arms are crossed over his chest and he’s staring at me.