Page 105

“Maybe she found out about Meredith’s new job?”

He sighs. “I just don’t want to see Mother again. After all she has done to me and Lillian, I want her as far away from us as possible. But I’ll do it, for Meredith. If she wants her there. Dad’s already decided he’ll go, too, regardless of Mother being there or not. He’ll do it for Mere.”

I swallow hard.

“Would you come, too?”

I want to crawl under the ground and die.

“Please, Logan? For moral support?”

He has no idea what he’s asking of me. But this is my best friend, and he needs me.

“I’ll be there.” My voice sounds weak even to my own ears, but Grayson smiles.

“Thank you. This is why you’ve always been my best friend.”

Guilt burns hot at the back of my head.

His best friend, who has been sniffing around his baby sister since she was eighteen. I’m disgusting, and now I’ve gotten her knocked up and everything I did, everything I gave up, all of it, means nothing.

I know now what I should have done. I should have told Grayson way back then. I should have told him then that I loved his sister. Still love her.

Now, everything just seems up in the air, and I’m not sure how to make things right again.

I’m not sure if I can.

“I’m just hoping everything is okay with her.” Grayson’s words break through my thoughts.

“I'm sure everything's fine.” The lie is like poison in my mouth.

“You weren’t around when she had her breakdown, were you?”

I shake my head, my heart dropping. I don’t know if I want to hear this story.

But Grayson takes a deep breath, and I know I’m going to hear it anyway.

“Mother asked me to come home from overseas because Meredith was so upset. She couldn’t tell me what was wrong, but she wouldn’t get out of bed or shower for days.” He sighs. “I finally pulled her out of it by just rotting with her, watching television, and trying to get her to talk.”

“And did she?” My mouth feels so dry my lips are sticking together, so I take a sip of water.

It doesn’t seem to help the rock in my throat.

He shakes his head. “No. She never said a word. Even the doctors were perplexed, called it ‘situational depression,’ but she never told us what the situation was.”

“It was nice of you to respect her boundaries.”

Grayson snorts. “That sounds like therapy speak. I wanted to shake her to get her to tell me what was wrong, but she was just so fragile. Wouldn’t stop crying. Wouldn’t eat for a week.”

My heart aches.

I can’t believe I did that to her. I can’t believe she took it so hard, and I had no idea. It’s not like I’d fared any better. I fell into a dark place for about a month, drinking every day until I had the shakes without it.

I went cold turkey after Bryce found me nearly choking on my own vomit in my little downtown office. He was with me through the hard times.

He poured all my liquor down the drain as I watched, the room spinning and fresh nausea rolling in my stomach.

“I don't know what’s wrong with you, boss, but you've got to get over it."