Page 95

“You mean your ex-girlfriend.”

“We only live together to save money. You know that, my love,”Daphne replied and kissed Iris again. “Besides, she’s at work now, and we have this whole apartment to ourselves.”

“I wantusto be able to live together.”

“Sweetheart, I’d love that, but you’re getting married.”

“I can’t get married to you,” Iris replied as she ran her hand through Daphne’s hair, loving it whenever she let it down like that.

“But we could still live together,” Daphne suggested. “People would think we’re roommates, just like they did when I was with Ruth.”

“He’s a good man, Daphne.” Iris gave her a straight-line smile.

“But he’s still a man,” Daphne countered. “And you’re only marrying him because you think it’s the right thing to do.”

“It’s what I’m supposed to do,” she replied.

“I’ve never done what I was supposed to do,” Daphne told her. “If I had, I never would have gone to university, never would have gotten my doctorate, and I wouldn’t have gotten a job where we work. I never would’ve met you, and you are my love.” Daphne slid back up Iris’s body. “I want no one else. Not Ruth. No other woman. And certainly, no man.”

“It’s not that easy for me,” Iris argued. “I’m not smart like you. I’m barely a decent secretary. I couldn’t even afford to keep living on my own.”

“I would take care of us.” Daphne kissed her forehead. “Sweetheart, please. Just leave him. Tell him you don’t love him; that you can’t marry him. Tell him anything you want, but please, leave him. The thought of him touching you at night, when I’m here alone and you’re with him, kills me over and over again.”

“I’m sorry,” Iris replied. “I don’t want him to. We said we wouldn’t before we got married prior to me moving in, but living there changed things.”

“Because you moved into the house and into his bedroom, sweetheart.” Daphne straddled her hips. “I love you, Iris. I am like this with no one else. Yet, you’ll go home after his trip away, and he’ll touch you. He’ll be… He’ll be inside you, and that hurts me more than words can say.” She wiped a tear from her cheek. “Soon, you’ll marry him, then your children will look like him, and I don’t know how long I’ll be able to stay here alone, wishing you were beside me every night and not with him.”

Iris closed her eyes because tears were welling within them and said, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Daphne replied. “But we only have ourmidday trysts at the office, we have a few evenings together when he is with friends and we are rushing through touching one another because he’ll be home soon or you have to be home from here soon, and we havethis.” She motioned around the room. “One time a year when he’s gone for a few days at a time and we can just be together. It’s been three years of this after one year of wanting you and knowing I was in love with you.”

“I’ve been putting the wedding off this whole time.”

“Putting off isn’tcallingoff, Iris. It’s not as if you go on dates with him, and he drops you off at home like a perfect gentleman, giving you a kiss goodbye because you’re waiting to move in until after marriage. If it were just that, maybe I could be more okay with it, but you can’t keep putting it off. He’s going to start to wonder, and I can’t keep living like this. I love you too much.”

“You mean, you want to stop?” Iris asked, her heart pounding in her chest.

Daphne was the only thing about her life that made sense to her. When they met, Iris had been a secretary to the owner of the company, and he’d been rude to her. One day, he’d told her that her typing speed wasn’t up to par, and there was Dr.Daphne McDonald, asking him how fasthecould type, changing the subject and rescuing her. Iris had smiled at her then, and Daphne had asked her to have coffee with her the next morning. Coffee had turned to evenings in a book club that Iris had recommended Daphne join, and then, dinners had started once a month or so when Iris could get away.

They’d gone an entire year without telling each other how they felt, and finally, Iris hadn’t been able to take it anymore. Daphne had often touched her. Usually, it had been a hand on her forearm or her knee, but that night, at dinner, Daphne hadkepther hand on Iris’s knee under the table at the restaurant instead of quickly pulling it back like she normally would, and when it had moved ever so slightly toward Iris’s inner thigh, she’d gasped right there at the restaurant.

“Where is he tonight?” Daphne had asked her then.

“With his brother. They’re playing cards with some friends.”

Daphne had nodded, and when they left the restaurant, she’d driven them to a hotel unexpectedly.

“I have a roommate,” she’d said while they sat in the car.

Iris hadn’t understood what Daphne had meant by that right away, but Daphne had gotten out of the car without another word, and she’d gone inside to check them into a room.

Of course, Iris hadn’t been able to stay the night. She’d been home by the time Edward had gotten there a few hours later. He’d also had a few drinks, and whenever he had a few drinks, he usually just went to sleep and passed right out. Iris liked those nights the best, which was a bad thing to say about the man she was to marry.

“We can just talk,” Daphne had told her that night.

They’d just entered the room, locking the door behind them, and Iris’s heart had been pounding.

“I don’t know what you mean. We always just talk,” she’d said.