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“Me too,” Eliza shared.

“Hey, have you given any thought to what I asked the other night?”

“The toy thing?” Eliza asked, blushing instantly.

“No.” Lydia laughed a little before she pulled her more inside the dorm room, closing and locking the door behind them. “But Iaminterested in where you landed on that.”

“I’ve never used anything like that before.”

“Neither have I. You know that. And we don’t have to, but there’s a ton of stuff out there to choose from. I thought we could look together and maybe pick out something to try.”

Eliza shook her head and said, “Wait… If youweren’ttalking aboutthat, whatwereyou talking about?”

“About us transferring schools?”

“Oh.”

“El, we’ve been together since junior year. I know we said we wouldn’t do that thing where we choose the same school just because we wanted to stay together, but we could research a school that works for both of us and apply there for next year. I know my parents wanted me to go to their alma mater, and I let them influence me, but I miss you. School is school – I don’t really care where I go. I just want to be with you.”

“I want to be with you, too,” Eliza replied with a smile. “Butwe said we wouldn’t alter our plans for the other person. What if we don’t work out?”

“Why wouldn’t we work out?” Lydia asked and moved to sit on the twin bed in the corner that belonged to Eliza.

“I don’t know. Any reason. I’m just asking. What happens if we change schools, or you go to school here, and we break up?”

“El, I love you. I don’t want us to ever end.”

“Lydia, we’re only nineteen years old. We don’t know what’s going to happen in two years, five, or ten. We could grow apart.”

“We haven’t yet,” Lydia argued.

Eliza moved to the bed to sit down next to her then and took her hand.

“I know. And I hope we don’t. But can you really just transfer like that? You say school is school, but if that were truly the case, you’d be here with me already. You wanted that program.”

“I wantyou,” Lydia stated, looking down at their joined hands. “It’s too hard, being away from you. Nightly calls and weekend visits when we can get them aren’t enough.”

“I know,” Eliza replied and rested her head on Lydia’s shoulder. “But I don’t want you to transfer just because of me, and I don’t think I should transfer just for you, either. I’m… I’m starting to like it here.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. And I know you like it there, too. You just don’t want to admit it.”

“I miss you. I miss being able to drive a few miles and be in your bed.”

“You’re in my bed right now,” Eliza pointed out, lifting her head. “And wearealone. We could make the most of our time this weekend.”

“And never leave this room?”

“Pizza will deliver. I have bottled water, snacks, and–”

Lydia’s lips were on hers before Eliza could finish that sentence, and they kissed like that until Eliza moved to lie down, and Lydia finally moved on top of her. She’d missed this. They’d moved seamlessly from friendship to more with only one awkward kiss and a first time that was always bound to be underwhelming yet perfect at the same time. Now, they knew one another’s bodies so well. They’d spent hours upon hours exploring, touching every part of the other person, making sure they always delivered pleasure, and Eliza didn’t ever want anyone else touching her like this.

Then, there was a part of her brain that went back to her most recent therapy session, where she was telling the counselor how she was worried about losing Lydia, so as Lydia touched her and brought her to her first orgasm of the weekend, Eliza was thinking and worrying about them growing apart. She worried about Lydia going to graduate school, or possibly law school, at the same university that was hours away from her, while she didn’t want to go to graduate school or move there. She worried that Lydia would go back home with her just because of that and end up resenting her for making her choose between something she wanted and their relationship. She also worried about losing her in other ways, too. After all, she’d already lost her father to a madman and her mother for the same reason. Yes, the woman was still alive, but she was only a shell of a person, really, and not much of a mother at all these days. What if something happened to Lydia, too? Hell, what if Eliza could never get past the death of her father that still haunted her every night when she fell asleep? Didn’t Lydia deserve more than Eliza could ever give her?

“Hey,” Lydia said, interrupting her worrying thoughts.

Eliza opened her eyes and looked into Lydia’s green ones.