Page 84 of Desserts for Stressed People

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When Shane parksin front of my apartment complex, my stomach sinks. The last twelve hours have been so great, I have barely thought about what happens now.

When our eyes meet, we both look away.

He is thinking the same—he’s probably worried I won’t break up with Alex. That I’m stringing him along, and I won’t keep my promise.

I wonder that too, for a second, then I know it’s a nonissue. Because nothing will happen between Shane and me until Alex is out of the picture. And I desperately need something to happen between us.

“How are you feeling?” he asks as he presses the button to turn the AC off.

“I’m considering using an email for the next portion of this,” I say barely above a whisper as I study the door to the hall. “You’re an expert at those. Is there anything I should know about breakup email etiquette?”

“Just remember to add ‘You deserve this’ in the subject line.”

Alex deserves that and worse. Unfortunately, I’m better than an email breakup. “We’re having a meeting with the marketing team at ten on Monday,” I say, holding onto my bag.

He stares out of the window. “And there are a few journalists coming in the afternoon with some questions.”

We’re stalling. We both know what’s happening on Monday, but we don’t want to leave. I don’t, because spending the last twelve hours with him has been exactly what I imagined it’d be like. More. I’m not ready to have a breakup conversation with Alex, and I’m just as unprepared at the idea of saying goodbye to Shane after last night.

“And on Tuesday—”

“Heaven,” he says, twisting in his seat so that he’s facing me. “I just want you to know that...I understand the importance of what you shared with me last night. And I...I think you’re perfect.”

Looking down at my lap, I smile. Where is this coming from? I mean, not that his words aren’t like liquid gold over my soul, but...why is this happening now? “Thank you, but I meant it when I said that I’ll break up with Alex.”

“No, I know. It’s not that. It’s just...” He smiles as if he’s telling himself a joke. “I see you. I see you for what you are, behind the layers of mistrust and fear and issues. I see you, and you’re—” He shakes his head. “I wouldn’t change a thing.”

I smile, barely holding back tears. “I—”

“And I know I’m not”—he tilts his head—“I interrupted you again, didn’t I?” When I nod, he leans closer. “I know I’m not the best person I could be, and I know you could change that. Easily. You have already. I’d change anything for you, the very fabric of who I am.” He half chuckles. “It’s probably not very healthy, but...I would.”

“It’s okay,” I breathe. “You’re right, it’s unhealthy, but I’d never ask you to. I like the very fabric of who you are as it is. And for the record, you can always interrupt me to say things like that.”

He smiles, breaking our intense eye contact after a few seconds. “Noted.”

Gripping the handle, I move to leave, but Shane’s hand wraps around my wrist.

“Wait,” he says, panic etched into his voice. “Look at me.”

“What? What is it?”

He swallows, his chest rising and dropping quickly. He looks like someone just kicked him in the groin. “I was—maybe we should get a coffee. Before you go.”

A coffee? We drank two this morning, and I’m honestly one step too close to peeing my pants already. I glance away, trying to not freak out over the fact that he doesn’t want me to go.

“No,” he says, loudly enough to make me flinch. His shoulders relax when my eyes land on his again. “No, look at me. Let’s get a coffee.” He starts the car, and I’m still pretty damn confused. What’s wrong with him?

His eyes shoot to the right for an instant, and mine follow until I’m staring at a couple walking down the street and stopping in front of the entrance door of my apartment complex. The man grabs the girl’s ass and kisses her—I can almost see his tongue down her throat. They’re both smiling, happy. She fists his hair, and he struggles to open the door because he can’t take his hands off her—myboyfriendcan’t take his hands off some other woman.

“Heaven...”

I hear Shane, but I pretend like I don’t and keep watching as Alex enters the building and disappears inside.

He’s bringing a girl to my apartment. He’s cheating on me in my own bed.

“Hey, Heaven...” Shane repeats as his fingers squeeze mine, halting my tremors. “Everything’s okay.”