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She let out a long, trembling breath. She couldn’t even speak. The deep emotions she’d been pushing down inside welled up and she couldn’t deny her feelings for another second. Jay’s gaze was still trained on hers and she had a feeling they both knew what was going to happen next.
She could barely taste the fancy little dessert they brought out, and both of them turned down coffee. Before she knew it, they were back outside looking at the water swirling and crashing against the rocks below them. Her heart pounded with a similar rhythm.
Jay turned toward her and she was positive he was going to kiss her. She was feeling a little wild—maybe it was the wine, maybe it was the setting, maybe it was because it had been so long since she’d been with a man, or because Jay was such a sweetheart with both Nelson and Buzzy. Whatever it was, she made the crazy decision that she was ready, not only to kiss him, but to go home and sleep with him too. In fact, she was so turned on by the prospect that she tingled all over and could hardly stand still.
She couldn’t wait for him to make the move and was about to lean in herself, when Jay tilted up her chin with a finger. “Has anyone ever told you that you have the most beautiful eyes? No, don’t look away, it would be a crime.”
Her heart plummeted like a rock through water.
She pulled back and said, “Stop!” before he got out the rest of his awful line and embarrassed them both even more. She stared at him, horrified, all of her desire snuffed out like a candle in a cold draft. “This is what you always do, isn’t it? This is your signature move to—” She made air quotes. “—seal the dealand get some unsuspecting woman into bed. News flash—I’m not anunderwearmodel.” She emphasized the word just to let him know she could say it to his face.
Instead of backing off and apologizing the way she expected, he almost leered at her. “I did see you in your bathing suit. Youcouldmodel.”
Erin shook her head, outraged. This wasn’t the Jay she liked. This was the hustler. The big shot. And now she was on the receiving end, being hustled.
What had gone wrong? On some level, she wondered if he was nervous, and trying too hard, but she was too angry to think it through.
She took another step back. “Does talking to women like that ever work?”
He still had that cocky look on his face. “Sure. Like you said, I always seal the deal.”
Erin’s revulsion had to be written all over her face, because at last it dawned in Jay’s eyes that he’d blown it.
“Deal?”she all but shouted. Her brothers had taught her how to hit a man without hurting her hand, so she could get in a surprise shot if she wanted to. But she stopped herself. She was better than that. More calmly, and very clearly, she said, “I am not a deal. Nor am I another notch in your bedpost.”
Jay looked stricken. All the color had drained from his face and the cocky smile was long gone. He threw up his hands and said, “No. That’s not what I meant.”
“I can’t believe I was almost ready to go home with you.” She paused and let it sink in just how much he’d screwed up. “And now you’llneversee me naked.” With that, she stepped away, pulled her phone out of her bag, and called a cab.
Jay followed her. “Erin, come on—at least let me drive you home.”
She kept her back to him. “No. I’m too angry.”
Luckily, there were plenty of cabs nearby to pick up patrons from the very fancy restaurant, so one pulled up right away. She strode toward it, but Jay overtook her and managed to open the door for her.
She glanced at him as she got in and before he shut the door, he opened his lips. She waited for him to apologize. Instead, he said, “You know I can’t resist a challenge. I’ll have you in my bed before you know it.”
She simply raised an eyebrow, letting him know she didn’t care about anything he had to say. In a clipped, emotionless voice she said, “In your dreams.”
Chapter Eighteen
Jay stood by the side of the road watching the taillights of the cab get smaller and smaller as Erin put space between them.In your dreams. He wondered if she would ever know how true those words were. Not only had he royally screwed everything up, but he was also definitely going to dream about her tonight, and the next night, just the way he had all week.
But now he’d made a complete mess of things, all because he was nervous and had acted like a clown.
He stood there long after the cab had disappeared from sight, powerless, rooted to the ground. He had to fix this, but he didn’t have a clue where to begin. He was used to things going his way and he had taken that for granted when he should have been putting Erin’s feelings first. This whole evening was supposed to have been about making her feel special and appreciated. Instead, he’d made her feel like just another in a long line of women.
The reality was that she was special. So incredibly special.
Slowly, he walked back to his car. He started the engine with a heavy heart. Even the car felt empty without her. He’d been so stupidly excited on the drive there, and now he didn’t even want to go back to the house because somehow it already reminded him of Erin. He let the engine idle for a moment, wondering what to do. There was a restaurant and bar nearby that he knew well, The Ram’s Head, which was part of a working sheep ranch. It had been owned by an A-list actor for years. Jay wasn’t much of a drinker, but he headed there anyway. It was a secluded spot—perfect for hiding away—and it was only a few minutes’ drive.
He went straight to the bar, happy to be anonymous, since no one who worked there knew him. He greeted the bartender and ordered a double whiskey, then after a beat added, “And keep ’em coming.” A line out of a cheesy Western, but he didn’t care. He felt exactly like that lonely drifter in every Western who walks into a bar and orders a drink to drown his sorrows. If this really were a Western, some gunslinger would walk in and pick a fight with him. Luckily, mostly tourists and locals had come out for a decent meal or a quiet drink. It was peaceful here. Not showy like the restaurant he’d chosen for Erin. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time, but now that he thought about it, Le Nuit didn’t suit Erin at all. He should have taken her somewhere more relaxed and intimate. He should have brought her here.
He looked out at the rolling green fields full of sheep and then back to the tables around him. Everybody there seemed to be part of a couple, and they were all enjoying each other’s company, talking with ease and laughing. That should have been him and Erin this evening. If he hadn’t made such a mess of things, he could only imagine what they might be getting up to right about now.
The bartender was true to Jay’s request and kept those double whiskeys coming, though he kept an eye on him. Probably making sure he didn’t make any trouble. But Jay was just getting quietly, sloppily drunk.
The day had started so well. The auction had been so much more fun than he’d imagined and now he’d ruined the day. The whole damn weekend. To try and cheer himself up, he thought about the antique movie camera he’d bought, and how he wanted to use it to make a genuine black and white picture. It would be so cool to shoot something on the same kind of camera that had been used to filmCitizen Kane.