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I don’tfeelany different after finally having sex.

There was some part of me that thought it was like some huge awakening, that my entire body would transform into some mystical being.

But all I can think about is wanting to do it again and all the new things I want to try.

The slamming of the trailer doors shakes me from my thoughts.

“What was that?” I ask Devon, already half-knowing the answer.

“Dad’s loading up those cows, duh.” My brother looks at me under his mess of dirty blond hair like I’m stupid. “He had me help him get them loaded last night since you were fucking gone.”

“‘Fuck’ is for grownups, child,” I quip on autopilot, while my heart cracks knowing that Millie is on that truck.

All I can hope is that Blue can follow through.

I guess this is where I find out who he chooses, me or Dad.

“You aren’t my boss, Lib,” Devon grumbles.

That makes me pause. “What if I was? Would you still work for me?”

His eyes and nose scrunch up. “What do you think I’ve been doing the last couple of years? If you take over, you better give me a raise.”

“Wait? You’d stay on?” For some reason I didn’t expect that from him.

His shoulders rise and fall in a shrug. “Sure, you’re easier to deal with than Dad. He really does pay like shit, though.” He shakes his head, opening the gate to let the last batch of cows into the milking parlor. “My football gear was like a whole ass paycheck.”

I let out a groan. “Language, Dev.”

He slams the handle through the clasp, his brows dropping over his blue eyes. “I’m working like an adult, I can talk like one. Fucking fire me.” He crosses his arms over his chest, glaring down his nose at me.

“Sorry. You’re right. We’re in this together. I don’t think I could run this place without you.” I hold out my palm in a peace offering. “I want us to be partners, you okay with that?”

He glances down at my extended arm. “Seriously? I’m not just cheap labor?” Slowly, he reaches out and shakes my hand. “Like, I can help make decisions and stuff?” A smile tugs up his cheek where the straggly whiskers of his attempt at a mustache cling.

This feels like a “moment”. “Yea, Dev. We’re family, it’s our business. You and me.” I pull him in for a fast hug. “Dad’s gonna be cranky for a while, but I’m glad I can count on you.”

“Thanks, Lib,” he whispers. His back seems a little straighter as he walks away. “I actually don’t mind this place,” he calls over his shoulder. “Audrey said she thinks it’s cool that our milk makes her favorite ice cream.”

Ahh. That girl from school he’s mentioned a few times.

It’s amazing what a difference that makes.

I don’t know if I’d have the courage to move forward with taking over without Blue’s help.

Don’t count on him. He’s only temporary.

There’s some irrational tiny voice in the back of my mind hoping that it isn’t.

But his past is plenty of warning on what to expect.

Keeping my emotions in check is gonna be hard. He’s just so damn likeable.

And the way he acts like he wants my needs to come first…Why can’t I secretly hope that maybe this is different?

Am I crazy to want to be the one who gets to keep him?

Yep.