Page 93
"Goblin was becoming agitated. He was staring at Fr. Kevin with a cold hate.
" 'No, Goblin,' I said. 'Don't do anything, Goblin. ' In a sudden fit of alarm, I looked around. There was a mirror above the lavatory. What if he broke it into fragments? He knew he could do this now!
"Goblin, the Learner.
"Goblin looked at me with the strangest smile, as if to say, Don't you think I know better?
" 'Listen, he's here,' I said to Fr. Kevin. 'You can't see him but he's at the foot of the bed. And it's rude to him to speak in his presence as if he were evil. He isn't evil. How he became attached to me, I don't know. Maybe he was just drifting, drifting and looking for someone who could see him, and then I came along, a child who had the gift. And we made our little brotherhood, him and me. I have no answers. But he saved me tonight. He saved me with an extraordinary show of strength. He broke the glass, not me, and I don't want him to think for one moment that I am ungrateful. ¡¯
"Fr. Kevin studied me intently throughout this speech and then he nodded. 'Well, let's leave it at this. If you need to talk to me, you call me. I've given my number to your Aunt Queen, and I'm in and out of Mayfair Medical doing rounds every day. I'm fast becoming the full-time chaplain here, and you'd be surprised what Dr. Rowan wants me to investigate. I'll stop back in later to see you. ¡¯
" 'What does she want you to investigate?' I asked. I was plenty intrigued. And I was simmering down, and I liked talking to him. He wasn't the clich¨¦ I'd expected him to be.
" 'Near-death experiences,' he said, 'that's what I'm investigating. You know, when people are pronounced dead and they see a bright light when they pass through a tunnel and greet a being of light -- and then they're revived and they come back here to tell us about it. ¡¯
" 'Yes, I know. I read everything on that subject that I can find. I believe in it. I believe it happens. ¡¯
" 'Often those people aren't believed,' he said. 'I'm here to believe, but never to ask a leading question or maybe make a suggestive statement. ¡¯
" 'I follow you,' I said. 'Have you talked to people who've had the experience?¡¯
" 'Yes,' he said, 'I have. Of course I give the Sacrament for the Sick too. And I hear confessions, and I bring Communion. ¡¯
" 'Do you believe me -- what I've just told you?¡¯
" 'I believe you believe what you're saying,' he said. 'Now do you want the Sacrament for the Sick? You know it doesn't require much of one. ¡¯
" 'I'm not sick,' I replied, 'and as to my sexual sins, well, I'm not ready to give all that up. I can't go to Confession just now. I can't take Communion. Sex is brand-new to me. ¡¯
" 'Yes,' he said with a weary little smile, 'it's difficult at your time of life. ' He shrugged. And then he flashed a brighter smile on me and said, 'I thought it was Hell when I
was your age, and frankly I think so sometimes now. Priests go to Confession, you know. They go to other priests. It's not so easy. ¡¯
" 'I like you. I know that may not matter much --. ¡¯
" 'Oh, yes, it matters,' he said. 'But I have to get back to St. Mary's. I have my parish duties as well as some work later at the university. I'll see you this afternoon. ¡¯
"He stood up.
"Something flashed into my head. 'Father,' I said, 'what if you do see a ghost that's evil, a ghost that leads you into harm, a ghost who wants some kind of dark vengeance? What do you do? You make the Sign of the Cross and you pray? Is that your only weapon?¡¯
"He looked at me for a long time before he answered. Then he said, 'Don't talk to it,' he said. 'Don't entertain it with talk or looks or any form of attention. Remember, it can't do much to you without your helping it. Just maybe it can't do anything to you without your helping it. Take the ghost of Hamlet's father, for instance. Suppose Hamlet had never gone to meet it and spoken to it. Suppose he had never given the ghost an opportunity to put a story of murder into his mind. The result was pure destruction for innocent and guilty. Think on it. What if Hamlet had refused to speak to that ghost?¡¯
" 'You mean the ghost was evil?' I asked.
" 'The play tells us so,' he said. 'It could be named The Damnation of Hamlet. ¡¯
"I nodded.
"He left the room and I lay there, getting sleepy and woozy and thankful that Goblin now took the chair by the bed, and I took his hand in mine.
"I thought of the malicious stranger. 'Who was that bastard, Goblin?' I asked. 'How did he get in my room?¡¯
"When I heard no telepathic answer I turned and looked at him, and I saw that same grave expression on his face that I had remarked down in the cemetery, after I'd buried the remains of Rebecca.
" 'Can't you talk to me, Goblin?' I said. 'Listen, I'll have them bring me paper and crayons tomorrow-a big sketchpad, you know-and we can write to each other. ¡¯
"He shook his head. He almost sneered. He did sneer. He looked cold and then angry. Computer, Quinn, bring a computer here.
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