Page 21

RAELYN
I struggleagainst the binds that hold my wrists together, my arms pulled behind my back. I can’t speak, I can’t hear anything. But I feel the vibrations under me. My fingers touch something cold as my heart beats fast. I try to move my legs, but they feel heavy, like they’re numb.
Help me.
With every ounce of strength I have, I try to roll to get some leverage to sit up. Except I can’t move. It’s like my entire body is dead weight.
Why can’t I move?
I try to scream, but no sound comes out. My eyes widen under the blackness that surrounds me. Without warning, fingers touch my head, and I shiver.
In a flash, the black veil is lifted from my head, and wicked faces surround me. Their eyes bore into me. I try to let out a scream again, but nothing comes out. But then hands reach out toward me?—
My eyes fly open as I try to catch my breath. Sweat drips down my back and face. My stomach rolls, and I have to choke back the bile crawling up my throat. The withdrawal symptomsare becoming worse now that I don’t have the detox meds. My skull feels like it’s splitting in half.
I look around, trying to adjust my vision to my surroundings. A low light comes from some night lights and the streetlamps outside the window. Nighttime is the worst. The darkness brings horrible things to life.
Placing my hand on my chest, I can feel the speed of my heart beating. I lay my head against the wall. I refuse to budge from the corner I found and took residence in once I got inside this room. The corner keeps me rooted in reality.
“Are you okay?” a soft voice across from me asks. My head snaps up toward her, but I don’t give her an answer.
They room you with others in this place. The feeling is familiar to me. I don’t know why, but it’s an unwanted sensation.
“Here.” Her soft voice speaks again, as she stands a few feet from me.
My eyes widen at how close she is to me. I try to push back farther, but the wall stops me. She frowns at my reaction but doesn’t say anything. Instead, she rolls a bottle of cold water at me.
The water hits my feet, and I look between her and the bottle. Is this a trick? My mouth feels like the desert, and suddenly my throat feels like it has sandpaper in it. The water would be so nice right now. So I grab it and quickly open it, chugging it back. The cool water hits the back of my throat, cooling me off instantly. I close my eyes and let out a long breath.
“Did you have a nightmare?” My eyes shoot up to the petite woman.
Her blonde hair is disheveled, with one strap of her tank top sliding down her shoulder.
She clears her throat and continues, “I get it. It’s a new, scary place. But this is a nice place with some nice people to help. Still, we all have those nightmares at some point. Hell, you wouldthink they wouldn’t be scary the older we get knowing that they aren’t real, yet we get all freaked out anyway. But you’re good here. Nightmares or not, this is a safe place. They want to help us.”
No one ever helps.
My thought hangs there in my mind. Where was my help when I was in the cage? When I was raped? Where was my help when I was running to get away from him?
Wait. I shake my head. That didn’t happen. I don’t think. Fuck! Everything is so confusing. Is this reality now? I blink a few times, my hand rubbing the ground. The rough carpet scrapes against my skin. It feels real. I’m not asleep.
“It’s probably more comfortable sleeping in the bed,” the girl offers.
My eyes shoot over to the bed, the red blanket that covers it neatly tucked into the sides. The single pillow in a white pillowcase on top of it. And she’s probably right, it more than likely is more comfortable. But I can’t.
I shake my head.No, I am safer here, I think in my head.
“Okay, well, if you change your mind, I’m sure you will get better sleep. But I get it. My name is Veronica Foster, but most call me Ronnie. Or Smalls, because I’m, well, small.” She looks at me, waiting for me to say something, but I offer her no words back. “I’m gonna get back to sleep. Feel free to wake me if you need me, alright?”
I nod my head and watch her get back under her covers. Within minutes, I can hear her soft snores. I rub the palm of my hand into my eyes.
I’m exhausted, but my mind doesn’t want to shut down again. My muscles feel stiff, and my neck hurts from keeping it up against the wall. My stomach cramps, and I try to contain my groan. My entire body just hurts. This fucking sucks so much. I have no idea how I’m going to survive all this.
Part of me just wants to find whatever drug will make this go away. Make the shakes stop, the muscle aches stop. But I know all that will do is delay the withdrawals all over again. I just want it all to stop. The hurting, the blank memories, everything.
It’s all so fucking confusing. My mind replays events from my captor, and dread fills me. But I can’t remember what happened before or how I ended up in Las Vegas. Everything is hazy, a blur. Was I even with my captor? I could have sworn I left and escaped, so how did I end up back in his house? In the fire?
My stomach rolls, and I can feel panic start to set in. The walls are starting to close in. It feels like his hands are wrapped around my throat. I claw at myself, trying desperately to get air. I need to get out of here.