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Oscar gets to his feet, stepping around me and storming to the other side of the room. “I’m not leaving.”
I move to my feet and pad over to him. He’s staring out the window, arms crossed. I slip my arms around him from the back, pulling him to me. “We’re not giving up our dreams. It’s like, what, December?”
Oscar laughs, the sound pained and lost. “So, after you kill K, you’re just going to what? Continue on at another high school? Go to college like nothing happened?” He places his hand on my arm to soften the blow.
I step in front of him, lifting my head at a slight angle so I can look him in the eye. “I am. It’s about living the rest of my life just as much as it ever was about killing K. To me, if we all don’t get out of here and start living those lives we wanted before the Crew, killing K won’t have mattered. I need you to dream, Oscar. I need you to apply for colleges where you can play football.”
He shakes his head. “No one’s looking at me, Kyla. Scouts won’t even come to the Heights.”
“Then you make them look. Didn’t you tell me about some scholarship before?”
He grimaces. “The All-State? It’s not happening.”
“Then we’ll do something else. We’ll get you some aid and you can be a walk on. You can play a year at a community college and then get recruited to a bigger one. You must have film of you playing, right? I’ll help you send out copies to every school in this state. Hell, to any schools in this country. You’re good, Oscar Drego. You deserve to be seen.”
Oscar takes my hands and moves them off him. He gives me a half-hearted smile. “I lost the fight in me somewhere along the way, Princess.” He squeezes my hands. “I mean, I’m just a druggy prostitute’s son.” He drops my hands and turns.
I don’t let him get far. “No. No, fuck that,” I say, eyeing all three of them. “I don’t care who we are here. Here, in the Heights, I’m a soon-to-be murderer. Oscar, you’re the would-have-been star quarterback. Brawler, you’re the bare-knuckle fighter who fights for the local crowd when you should be in an octagon in the UFC. Magnum…I don’t know. Fuck.”Reminder to myself to find out what Magnum would be if he left here because I’m dying to know.Surely, his goal isn’t to keep the Heights Crew alive anymore. “This is just something I’m doing right now to get to where I want to be. It’s like braving the storm to get out the other side unscathed.”
“What do you want, Kyla?” Magnum asks. “When all this is over?”
I swallow to keep my emotions in check. What I want is so basic. I don’t dare to think beyond that. I don’t know about college, though I think it’s a good idea. I don’t know about fighting, even though I’d love to. But all that would be icing on the cake because what I really, really want is to just be surrounded by people I love. That’s all I’ve ever wanted since I was twelve. “You,” I say. “All of you. Around me. Being there for me. Caring for me.” The L-word is on the tip of my tongue, but fuck if I can say it right now. I don’t want to put a name to the emotion because what if I lose it all again? It will eat me from the inside out next time.
Brawler rises to his feet. My heart lodges in my throat as he prowls forward, not giving me any time to think. He dips, capturing my lips with his, kissing me thoroughly. His tongue presses against my lips until I relent, giving him access to all of me. Whether he’s meaning it in this way or not, his kiss is like a balm to my soul. When he pulls away, my lips feel swollen and worshipped. “I’m there,” he says. He turns toward Oscar. “I’ll help you, too. Kyla’s right. You shouldn’t give up on football because we got dealt shitty hands with a deck no one cares about anymore.”
Oscar rubs the back of his neck. He hits his cap, making it sit awkwardly on his head. He grabs it off, turns toward me, and puts it on my head. Leaning down, he kisses me. “I need a moment. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
I grab his hand to hold him back. “Don’t go.”
He wiggles out of it. “It’s okay. I’m good. I just…I’ll be here tomorrow, alright?”
Oscar makes it to the door before Brawler leans over to kiss my temple. “I’ll go after him. Don’t worry. We got this shit handled.”
I watch them both go, the door closing behind them. Magnum gets up to lock it as I blow out a breath. “He’s not used to having people stick up for him, not even in front of himself.”
“Which is why we need to get out of here.” I rub my temples, and Magnum moves up, placing his hands on my hips. I love how he’s gone from staying away to touching me like it’s natural.
“Sorry,” he says, like he’s somehow heard my train of thought. “I just don’t want to stop touching you now that I can.” He drops his forehead to mine. “I was sure Johnny would be able to get you back, but…it didn’t ease my worries any.”
My heart squeezes in my throat. His presence looms over me, dousing my body in sensations. Curiosity pricks at me. Magnum and I were friends first. Countless hours spent with each other in his apartment and in the car while he carted me everywhere. We became easy talking buddies after a while, but after the weeks have passed, this seems like a giant leap I can’t wait to take, but it’s still a leap.
“I will go as slow as you want,” he breathes.
My body hums in approval, a slight vibration that automatically moves me closer to him. His arms wind around my back, and I have to remind myself to breathe. “If you’re with me, what do you want after this, Magnum?” I smile, remembering that day in the hospital when the detective let the cat out of the bag about Mag’s name. “Detective Reynolds told me your real name.”
The corner of his mouth teases up. “Iamwith you.” He leans over, his lips brushing against mine. “And you can call me by my real name.”
“Jacob,” I say, testing the sound of it on my lips, but only serving to increase the friction between us. My mouth buzzes, tingling with excitement as it moves over Magnum’s plump lips.
“Say it again.” His demanding voice sets fire to my core.
“Jacob.”
He covers my mouth with his own, teasing and prying, spreading my lips apart, so he can dive his tongue inside. I moan hard, leaning my hips into him until he pulls me that much closer, removing all distance between us. He reaches his hand up my back, tangling in my hair until he holds me in place while he ravishes me. He plays my mouth like a kissing prodigy, knowing exactly what and where and how to have me gasping for breath.
“I miss my real name,” he says finally. His chest slides against mine as we both compete for the same air.
“Magnum is pretty badass though.”