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Now, I knew I’d only feel worse after. I squeezed my eyes shut, praying sleep would take me now. Knowing it would be hours before it did.

That’s when I heard the buzz of my phone.

A text message.

I reached over and picked it up.

Somehow I knew it would be him. With shaking hands, I opened the text.

* * *

Will:I’ll do it.

* * *

My heart thudded.I sat up straight, staring at the words.

“Now?” I said out loud. “Fucking now, Will? When I’ve already said goodbye?”

But we all know you’re no good at goodbyes.

Joe’s voice. I almost laughed. He only showed up when I was thinking about Will now. It was the worst, most painful irony.

I’d ignore it. I clapped my phone down on the bedside table and pulled up the covers, tossing and turning for a full minute before giving up and grabbing the remote from the table next to my phone. As soon as I turned the TV on, I was slapped in the face with a painfully familiar black and white image. It’s a Wonderful Life. Through my anger, I felt my heart crack.

Joe and I used to watch this movie together. He watched it to indulge me—he found Jimmy Stewart annoying—which always incensed me. It was something we used to tease each other about, every Christmas.

I pushed away an angry tear and picked up my phone.

Will answered on the first ring.

“No,” I said. Then to my horror, I started to cry.

“Michelle?” Concern made Will’s voice tight. “What is it?”

“I said no. You can’t tell me it’s a shit idea, kiss me the way you did, leave me for two weeks and then text me with that—”

“Whoa— hey, you asked me!” His voice was cut through with anger. “I thought this was what you wanted!”

I hesitated. Was it? Did I still want to pretend to date Will Archer for my blog?

Or did I really want him?

I sat up, muting the TV, my mouth suddenly dry. “What happened to you thinking it was a terrible idea?”

“I’m still not convinced it’s the right thing to do.”

“That’s not for you to decide.”

“It is if you’re asking me to get involved.”

Anger burned in my chest, but it was weak like the coals were cold; already burnt. I pinched my lips, then closed my eyes too. This was stupid. Beyond stupid. “It’s fine, Will. You’re right—”

“See, I’m not so sure about that, either.”

I opened my eyes, shifting the phone to my other ear. “What do you mean?”

“I mean if there’s a chance this can help you, I want to do it.”