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“Of course. It’s a?—”
“It’s a spinosaurus.” Ethan grins down at him.
Jaxon’s smile fades shyly and he reaches for my hand, his hazel blue eyes locked on Ethan. “Who is this?”
“Sorry Champ, I didn’t mean to scare ya. I’m your mom’s friend, Ethan.”
“Oh.” Jaxon nods. Then he lets go of me, to my complete surprise. He holds the painting up with one hand, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose with the other. “You got it right. Most people would have guessed a t-rex. But t-rexes don’t have–”
“The back fin.” Ethan answers and Jaxon lights up.
They keep talking, something about teeth and claws and scales but I can’t keep up. I can’t even breathe. Ethan is smiling at Jaxon. Jaxon is smiling back at Ethan. And my fucking god do they look alike…
I never noticed it before. Not like this. But everything from the way they talk with their hands, to the way they tilt their heads when they say something they think you don’t know, to the way their smiles are perfect until they laugh and then they get ever so slightly lopsided– is the same. The dark thick hair, the intense eyes, the slope of their noses.
All. The. Same.
“Jaxon we need to go.” I blurt out. “Go potty first because we have to walk back.”
“Okay!” Jaxon agrees.
“I’ll hold that for you,” Ethan offers, reaching for the painting.
“You can have it. I’ve never met someone else who likes dinosaurs as much as me.”
Jaxon scampers off and Ethan and I turn towards each other. “Cute kid,” he says casually.
“You were not supposed to meet him.” I snap back.
“Why not?”
“Because…” I trail off because I can’t say what I was about to say.
Because he is your son.
“I just…I am trying to protect him.” I say.
Ethan nods. His expression is soft. “I understand.”
Jaxon is already by our sides again and we head for the door. “Are we still getting ice cream?”
“Ice cream?” I ask the word like I’ve never heard it before.
“Yes. From the ice cream lady at the park. You said we could get it today after you worked out. You said you had to burn some calories so you could eat more. You said–”
“Okay!” I smile, covering Jaxon’s mouth with my hand and making him giggle. Meanwhile, Ethan is biting back a smile.
“Can Ethan come too?” Jax asks.
“Oh I doubt Ethan wants ice cream–”
“I’d love to,” he cuts me off. I raise my eyebrows at him but he just raises his back.
After Ethan pays for three cones, Jaxon takes off for a swing and Ethan and I sit on a bench. “He’s a great kid,” he says after a moment. “I’m sorry you feel like you have to hide him.”
My heart clenches in my chest. “Jaxon was unexpected. It’s not that I feel the need to hide him so much as I need to keep him safe.”
Ethan looks at me with worry in his blue eyes. The same blue as Jaxon’s. God, now that I’ve seen it, I’ll never unsee it. “Safe from what?”