Page 64

WAVERLY

S o yeah, Keene and my mother did not get along.

The week progressed with me suffering through Mom’s complaints and snarky comments about Keene when I was home, and then listening to him bitch and moan about how early he had to return me when I was with him. He’d joke about me getting grounded or my allowance cut off if we were too late.

I’d never been grounded once in my life. I wasn’t even sure if my parents had a grounding policy.

Both sides started to stress me out until at least Keene realized how much it bothered me, and he stopped belittling my mother after the first few days. But I could feel the cold resentment waft off him whenever I mentioned anything to do with my family, and I knew…

This was never going to work. Not in the long run.

Except Keene was in my life right now—and he seemed to want to be there—so I helplessly followed the flow to wherever this train wreck of a relationship was headed. I couldn’t relinquish him just yet.

Especially on Valentine’s Day.

After applying the finishing touches of gloss, I stepped back from the mirror and rubbed my lips together. Xander’s fashion lessons had been paying off. Pleased by the outcome, I turned away and hurried downstairs to keep watch for Keene out the front window.

I didn’t want him to have to come to the front door when he got here and risk a repeat of Monday night.

“Well, look at you,” Dad said as he appeared at the entrance of his office and leaned against the door frame, tucking a folded newspaper under one arm as he smiled affectionately. “You look lovely. Got a big date tonight?”

“With her boyfriend ,” Gates taunted from the back den.

Rolling my eyes, I couldn’t stop the blush from heating my cheeks as I met my dad’s gaze. “Yeah,” I said, only to hold my breath, waiting for him to go into some lecture or warning about Keene because of Mom’s feelings toward him. “He should be here any minute.”

Without immediately answering, he made me squirm by the thoughtful way he studied me.

“So you really like him, huh?”

I nodded, swallowing thickly, unable to voice aloud just how much I liked Keene.

Dad nodded back slowly, his eyebrows twitching with some unnamed emotion I couldn’t place before he admitted, “I wasn’t sure if you’d ever find any interest in dating after…”

He let the words trail off, and an itchy awful discomfort crawled over my skin. I think this was the first time he’d ever made a reference to my rape. He usually let Mom deal with these conversations. Hearing him admit it had actually happened felt foreign to me.

And for some reason it made my voice sound like rust when I quietly answered, “I think I’m only interested in dating because of him.”

His head shifted up and down with careful contemplation before a small smile slipped across his face. “So you’ve been watching him for a while, huh?”

I blinked, not sure what he meant.

“Yeah,” he murmured fondly. “Remember when you were five and we took you to the pet store to get a new kitten?”

I nodded.

Cadbury had been my first pet, only to get run over on the street about two years after Zane had died and a couple of weeks after Sprout had taken my virginity. I remember standing in the backyard, watching Dad bury him, and not crying once. I just expected to lose something I loved by that point.

Shaking his head in amusement, Dad kept talking with no idea where my own thoughts had gone. “We had to go back to that store seven times before getting anything because you had to study and scrutinize each cat before deciding which one was perfect for you.”

Sending me a look filled with deep pride, he added, “I know my little girl. You don’t make rash decisions. You watch and deliberate, which tells me there must be something about this kid that makes him right for you.”

I mean, I’m not sure what he’d say about my impulsive actions lately , but he was right that I’d carefully chosen the boy to do those crazy, impulsive things with.

I released a relieved breath, happier than I could express that he wasn’t going to warn or lecture or judge.

And I said, “He is.”

Accepting that, Dad inclined his head solicitously. “Good,” he murmured. “I trust your decisions then.”

My lips parted. “You do?”

He nodded again, and I almost freaking cried over his support. Needing to show him how much I appreciated him, I surged forward and hugged him hard, saying, “Thank you, Dad.”

He shuddered for a moment in my arms and then squeezed back tightly. Tighter than I could ever remember him hugging me before. But that thought only made me wonder how long it’d been since I’d last embraced him. Probably years. Not since…

Shit. No wonder why he was keeping his arms locked around me for so long. He knew how adverse I’d been to touch. And he’d respected my boundaries.

When he finally let go and pulled back, he had to clear his throat and discreetly draw the back of his hand across his cheek under his right eye. “So, uh, where’s he taking you? Somewhere fancy, I hope. He knows this is your first Valentine’s Day to have an actual Valentine, right?”

I grinned, feeling giddy and expectant about tonight. “He knows,” I assured. “And I don’t know what we’re doing. He says it’s a surprise.”

“Mmm.” Lifting his eyebrows in approval, Dad slapped the side of my arm in encouragement with his newspaper and said, “Well, have fun.” And he turned to stroll toward the back, probably headed for the kitchen for his afternoon snack.

I was staring after him, trying not to feel bad about all the years I hadn’t hugged him. I guess I hadn’t been the only one who’d paid the price for what had happened to me. My entire family had suffered along with me.

Promising myself I’d be more affectionate with my father from here on out, I glanced up when I heard footsteps on the stairs.

Seeing Mom pause with a basket full of laundry propped against one hip as she took in my outfit, I inwardly cringed, bracing for the vitriol I knew was coming next.

Heaving out a disappointed breath, she shook her head and snarked, “Well, I guess you’re going out with him again, huh? He realizes you have classes to study for, right?”

“He knows,” I bit out, crossing my arms over my chest as I turned to the window to take up looking for him. “He has classes to study for too, Mother.”

“Mmm,” she hummed, but in a completely different manner than Dad had used just moments ago. “And what’s his major? The study of women’s skirts?”

“It’s nursing,” I bit out. “He wants to be a doctor .”

Mom sniffed derisively, but at least she said nothing about his noble aspirations. I started to chew on a thumbnail, hoping Keene hurried his ass up before Mom started in about?—

“He looks just like his father, you know.”

Shocked by that unexpected announcement, I whirled back to gape at her as she slowly descended the rest of the stairs until she was in front of me.

“Oh yeah,” she murmured with an ominous twinkle in her eyes.

“I knew his dad. He was younger than me—a freshman when I was a senior—but I still had a huge, raging crush on Eric Dugger. Just like every other girl in that school.”

I blinked, even more startled to hear that. It was impossible to picture anyone else in her life but Dad. “So you and Keene’s dad…?”

Mom lifted her eyebrows in question before laughing. “Oh, no,” she assured, shaking her head. “Never. He didn’t even know I existed. Which was for the best. That asshole was the most selfish, insensitive, lying whoremonger I ever met. Just. Like. His. Son.”

I started to shake my head because Keene wasn’t selfish. He wasn’t insensitive.

But Mom only laughed. “Oh, honey. You don’t even know the half of it.

Keene and Eric could be twins because of how similar they are.

Same infectious charm and engaging smile.

Same life and vitality. Same good looks and cocky strut.

I know exactly why you were drawn to him, Waverly, but you have to listen to me.

” Setting down her basket, she came to me and took my hands in hers.

“He’s no good. If you only knew what Eric did to Keene’s mother. ”

“I do know what he did,” I said. “And that’s why Keene can’t stand his dad. He hasn’t had any contact with him in years.”

“And yet he acts just like him,” Mom sneered.

I sighed and turned away, understanding her aversion to my boyfriend a little more now but not excusing her for it. Keene wasn’t his dad, no matter how much she tried to convince me otherwise.

“He did it because of a dare, you know.”

Rolling my eyes, I told myself I didn’t care what she was talking about; it was only going to lead to some new reason why she was so convinced I should stay away from Keene.

But my curiosity got the best of me. Glancing over my shoulder, I asked, “Who did what for a dare?”

“Eric,” she answered. “It was three or so years after I graduated, but I still heard about the whole thing. His friends challenged him to sleep with the weird, autistic girl. And he took the dare seriously. He just didn’t count on his parents making him step up and take responsibility for his child when he accidentally knocked poor Robin Laterman up after winning the dare. ”

I shut my eyes briefly. Poor Robin. I grew an even deeper appreciation for the ghost who’d saved me from an attack, only to suddenly realize where my mom was going with this.

My eyes shot open in dismay as I gaped at her. But did she seriously think?—?

“Trust me,” I muttered. “No one dared Keene to pretend to be interested in the weird, depressed rape victim, if that’s what you were thinking.”

His friends would never do that. Because his core group was obviously better than his father’s had been.

Eyebrows lifting with interest, Mom didn’t even deny her suspicions. Instead, she asked, “So he knows then? About your rape?”

I furrowed my brow, not answering. And reading the answer from my expression, she shook her head.

“Of course, he doesn’t. Because there’s no way the Keene Dugger I knew in high school would be able to handle taking on a girl with your amount of trauma.

He doesn’t have the depth or the compassion.

Even if he wanted to try, he’d crack under all the weight and take off at the first chance he got.

Is that what you want, baby? You want him to charm you into falling for him, only to watch his back as he runs off as soon as he finds out what he got himself into?

Because that’s what he’ll do. And then you’re going to spiral again until—until?—”

“Until I try to kill myself?” I asked harshly, lifting my chin and glaring.

She jolted, only to rasp, “That’s not what I was going to say.”

“But that’s what you meant, right?” I challenged, narrowing my eyes. “That I’m too weak to have a boyfriend. I can’t take the heartbreak of him inevitably leaving. Because you’re so sure no one could possibly want to keep someone as broken and messed up as I am.”

Her eyes flared. “Now that’s really not what I was going to?—”

“Screw you,” I seethed. “I know how far from normal I am, okay? And maybe you’re right. Maybe he won’t want to stick around once he realizes what kind of freak he’s dealing with, but that’s my risk to take. Not yours. And I’m going to take it. So just butt out, alright?”

When her mouth fell open in shock because I’d never once spoken to her that way, I glanced out the window and was more relieved than I could admit when I saw Keene’s Jeep pull into the driveway.

Turning back to my mother one last time, I muttered, “But thanks so much for letting me know you think no one’s ever going to be able to love me for me. I appreciate it.”

“Waverly!” she cried in horror. “No, I?—”

“Don’t worry,” I cut in, yanking the door open as I left. “I’ll be home by your stupid curfew.”

Because I still understood she was acting this way from a place of fear.

My suicide attempt might’ve scarred her more than anyone.

Every day, everything she did was to keep me alive.

She was suffocating me, holding me from any possibility of growing up and living my own life, because she couldn’t handle the possibility of me failing and trying to end it again.

So I was going to respect her rules and ease her fears as much as I could. But nothing she said was going to keep me away from Keene.

Pushing her poisoned words from my head as I hurried across the porch and down the steps toward him— He’s just like his father. He can’t handle the weight of your trauma and baggage. He’ll run the first chance he gets —I picked up my pace, needing his smile more than I needed my next breath.

The driver’s side door of the Jeep opened, and all six glorious feet of Keene popped out. “Hey,” he chastised teasingly, lifting his hands in pretend offense, even as he grinned that grin I loved so much. “I was going to come to the door like a proper?—”

Not letting him finish, I threw myself at him, hugging him hard and rising up on my toes to kiss the fuck out of him.

Muffling out his surprise, he caught me against him and hugged me back, his tongue spiking between my teeth. Then his hands were on my ass, and he was lifting me until I was wrapping my legs around his waist.

“Or this,” he gasped when he came up for air. “Yeah. This way works too. Damn, woman.” Shaking his head, he blinked his vision into focus and grinned at me. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” he murmured. “You ready for a night you’ll never forget?”

“Yes,” I said, already forgetting everything I’d just been stressing about.

I was ready for anything with him.