Page 35 of Worth Every Moment

“I let him go down on me at the gallery night.” I spit the words so fast they’re almost incomprehensible, and it takes a moment before understanding blossoms across Amy’s face.

“Why, you dirty little slut,” she says with glee. “Did you like it? Did you like having him”—Her gaze dips to my tiny boxing shorts—“down there?”

Heat bursts low in my belly. “I don’t know. No. Maybe. Yes.” I let out another groan as the memories flash back at me. “Afterwards—”

“Did you come?”

I huff. “Right to the crux of the matter, eh?”

“Yup,” she says with glee. “Did you?”

My body feels like it contains an ocean of swirling emotion. “No. I stopped it before that.” I rub my fingers over my forehead and let out a whimper that’s doused in regret. “I completely freaked out. I ran away, and he ran after me, and then we had this horrendous fight.” I press my hands to my cheeks, which are flaming at the memory. “I completely lost it. Went crazy. Told him he shits silver spoons.” I drag my hands down my face. “I was so mean to him. Said everyone thinks he’s a joke.”

Amy crosses her arms over her chest. “What idiots think that? I certainly don’t.”

My throat constricts. “My mother?” I offer, realising it sounds pathetic. Amy rolls her eyes and I press my fingers to my lips, pausing before I add, “I called him a manwhore.”

“Shit,” Amy breathes. “That’s harsh.” She appears to mentally withdraw from me before she opens her arms wide, beckoning me with her fingers like she wants to fight. “You wanna do me too? I mean, come on. I can take it. Call me a whore.”

I cover my eyes with my hands and whine before letting them drop. “God, no. I’m sorry. It’s none of my business what he does, or what you do, but it felt like it at the time.” I shudder at the memory. “I don’t want to fight with anyone like that again. It was so intense. He said I only care about my brand and my business. My career.” I grimace. “I think we might be over. Broken. I threw up afterwards.”

Amy relaxes her stance. “You wereactuallysick?”

The memory of clinging to the toilet bowl and vomiting up my insides makes me want to retch again. “Yeah. It was either that or bawl like a baby.”

“Oh, hun.” She steps towards me, puts her hands on my shoulders, and pulls me into a hug. “You fought like you love each other.”

Her words stun me and it’s a second or two before I can speak. “No.” I push out of her hold, shaking my head. “No, that’s not what it was. He said hooking up with me was as meaningless as everyone else.”

“Pfft.” She flaps a hand. “That’s definitely not true.”

My shoulders slump, and there’s a crushing sensation in my chest, like my heart really might be breaking. I stare at the floor. “It felt true.”

Amy says nothing, but when I glance at her again, she’s smiling. “What?”

She raises a brow and nods suggestively. “You like him.”

“No,” I snap back.

She beams wider, and irritation slips like grease through my insides.

“Can you stop that demonic grin?”

She bounces on her toes, throwing a few shadow punches as she does it. “Do you want to fuck him? Because he’d be a great person to finally lose your V-card to. You’ve known him for years, and he cares about you. And he’sveryexperienced.”

I press my fingers against my temples. “How have you leapt to this?”

Amy stops bouncing. “Does he know you’re a virgin?”

Her question stabs into me and I can’t help glancing around the room to make sure no one’s listening, even though I already know it’s completely empty. “I don’t tell people that.” I wave a hand at her. “Except you.”

Amy nods solemnly. “He might forgive you for your craziness if he knew. If I were a virgin and Seb Hawkston put his head between my legs, I’d go crazy too.” Her eyes light up and she points two emphatic fingers at me. “You should tell him, and then fuck him.”

“Argh. No.” I lightly slap her arm. “Don’t say that. Do not encourage me. I don’t want to mess up this friendship forever.” I groan. “I don’t know if we even have a friendship anymore. He hasn’t sent me a GIF for weeks.”

“A GIF?”

I march to the side of the gym and pick up my bag from where I dumped it on the floor. Amy crosses to join me, swigging on her water bottle.