Page 80 of Will It Hurt?

Aisla

Minutes before dawn, I found myself in our back garden, staring at a pair of familiar blue eyes. Except this time, there were no crimson tears. No hesitant quivering of lips.

Just a pale, determined girl who waited to be vanquished by airborne silver.

Belle eyed the silver canister as she sat next to me on the stone steps. I studied her as she looked past the cluster of trees and watched the first hint of sunlight on the horizon.

“How did you know?” she asked, angling her chin toward the canister.

I shrugged. “I’m good at reading people.”

“Oh really?” She leaned back to rest her elbows on the top step. “What did you see when you saw me?”

I had no reason to lie. Not now—not when Belle had a handful of minutes left on this earth.

“Someone deeply unhappy.”

For long minutes, Belle said nothing.

“You’re right,” she finally agreed, although the words sounded like self-reflection rather than conversation. “Why did it take me so long to realize it when you saw it in me straight away?”

The sentiment settled between us like a gentle pause. The first dregs of sunlight drifted through the trees and mapped Belle’s features with the shadows of tree branches. There were no clouds in the sky to buoy the effects of sunlight, but Belle didn’t flinch.

The world outside our iron gates moved at its own pace—birds in the distance, the occasional thud of footsteps on cobblestone—but here, beside me, Belle sank into her own thoughts.

A deep breath. A small sigh.

I watched as her expression softened, the edges of sadness smoothing into something calmer, clearer.

“Will you…” She began, glancing away. Her eyes landed on the barrels that shimmered with moon magick. “I know it’s selfish of me to ask, but…”

I waited for her to complete her thought.

“Will you keep an eye on Jinn for me?”

Caught off guard by the request, I stared at her.

“What?”

Belle’s smile was sheepish. “She smells like you. Like your magick.”

My eyes locked with hers.

“The fact that she’s here, in your warded home, tells me everything I need to know.”

She pulled her knees up and rested her cheek on them. “It’s also reassuring, in a way.”

“How?”

Belle flashed a neat row of teeth as she smiled. “For the last few decades, Jinn’s focus was solely on me. Keeping me safe and sane was her only agenda, and I love her for it but…”

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ears. “Everything else, including her own needs, fell off the list of priorities. I just… want her to be happy. And it feels like she has been happy in the few days I’ve been gone.”

Well… happy might be pushing it, but if Belle was about to be vanquished with the knowledge that her mother had found some semblance of happiness with me, then so be it.

“You’re asking a lot of me,” I said instead, interlacing my fingers.

“Well.” Belle’s laugh was altogether cheeky. “Since this is my dying wish and all…”

An involuntary smile tugged at the corners of my lips.

I could see why Jinn loved this girl so much.

We’d only spent five minutes together and I was already growing fond of her.

The gravity of our discussion should have left no room for such a soft sentiment, yet there it was, settling in my chest with a gentle warmth.

“Thank you,” she said. “I can’t imagine the trouble you must have gone through to bring me back. Indira is a real bitch when she wants to be.”

I waved her words away, feeling my bones ache as I did.

“It was nothing,” I said, then decided not to lie. “Well, it was a shit show, but I survived… I think.”

“I hope you’ll find some peace in the knowledge that Indira has no reason to come after you now. I’m choosing death—not for her, but for myself.”

I acknowledged her words with a nod.

“Do me a favor,” she said, the bow of her lips quirking up at the corners as she got to her feet. “Don’t bring me back this time.”

In a different life, Belle and I could’ve been friends.

She offered me a hand. Her skin was cold against mine as I slid my palm into hers.

“I won’t,” I said, getting to my feet. “It’s clear that you’re at peace with your decision.”

“Yes.” She released my fingers to cross her arms over her chest. “At peace. It took me a long time to get here and I’m not changing my mind. ”

I offered her a small smile.

“So,” I began, tracing the ridges along the nozzle with the pad of my thumb. “Does it?”

Belle tilted her head. “Does it what?”

“Hurt.”

I echoed her final question to me just a few days ago.

A small smile played around her lips. “Only for a second, and then… Nothing.”

“Good.” A relieved sigh tumbled from my lips. “I’m glad.”

The oncoming dawn swallowed my words.

Belle’s blue gaze fluttered behind my shoulder and up to the house. There was no question of who was standing there, watching us. Her smile trembled slightly as she waved.

A final goodbye.

“I’m ready,” she said, her eyes never wavering from the house.

It was over in a second—faster than any neutralizations I’d ever performed. I stood in the empty space she left behind, surprised by the speed of it all, as though the other side was impatient for her to return.

When I turned to glance up at the house, Jinn’s shadow was gone.

“ Shanthi ,” I said—for Belle, for Jinn, for all of us.