Page 5 of Who's Loving You

I have nothing to say. Sorry only cuts it so many times, and I’m pretty sure all the holes have been punched in my apology card. I swallow back boulder sized nerves and dip my chin, giving him a short nod of understanding before being dismissed.

Seems like I’ve really done it, now.

I reach into my pocket and pull out my phone, firing off a text to the two guys who know me best. They may not have a solution to the shit pile I find myself in, but at least they’ll be able to commiserate.

I tell them to be ready in thirty minutes because this requires a phone call. They give me a middle finger, which is our way of agreeing with the other, and I shove my phone back into my pocket.

When Bash drops me back at my house, I do exactly as Coach ordered me to do. I sit on my couch, watchingtv and talking with my best friends, and marinating in worry of what will happen next.

When your coach and the owner of the team get together to “talk” about what to do with you, it can’t mean anything good. It feels the same as when Mom and Dad would have to discuss my punishment before laying down the law. I guess the one good thing is that Coach can’t spank my butt for being naughty.

At least I hope he can’t.

2

VALENTINA

Mamá: Valentina. Would you like to come to comida on Sunday?

Me: Mamá. I live in Houston. How am I supposed to have dinner with you?

Mamá: It wouldn’t kill you to come see your family.

Me: Again…I live in Houston. You are in California. That kind of makes it difficult to just drop by to say hi.

Mamá: Well, then maybe it’s time you moved back. You can’t possibly be happy all by yourself. No family. No husband. Aren’t you lonely? Plus, your hermanita invited someone you may like.

Me: Mamá. I’m really busy. I’ll have to call youlater. Te amo.

The scratch of my pen as it moves across the paper is a soothing sound that always calms my nerves. Or is it the checking off of items on my impeccably organized to-do list that eases the tension in my shoulders?

I know the more modern approach to making lists is on one’s phone or computer, but there’s just something about putting pen to pad that is so satisfying. Plus, I read a study that a person is thirty percent more likely to remember a task if written by hand. And if something can help me retain information, then that’s just what I’m going to do. With a busy life that includes dozens of phone calls and new names to memorize every week, I’ll take all the help I can get.

I go line by line, reading each item and swiping a red checkmark next to the tasks I’ve completed.

Set up a meeting with Luca Amato, owner of the Houston Wranglers baseball team…check.

Follow up on the Chevy Yearling scandal with Governor Townsend…check.

Reply to new client inquiry…check.

Book flight to visit parents to listen to them ask why I’m not married…another day.