Page 23

23

Aran

After our security shifts end, we spend the evening trying to figure out what it means that Eleanor stood Hex up the same way Katy didn’t show up for poker with Mong. There is some correlation between the two women showing up at the same party and attending the event afterwards, but that doesn’t necessarily mean their strange behavior is linked.

Mrs. Streiss doesn’t call Hex that night as we were expecting her to. Or the next two days, despite how excited she has generally been thus far to have his company. Eleanor doesn’t show up either. By the time dinner service begins on the third night, we are yet to make any progress on the girls who’ve been sleeping around with the VIPs. As it turns out, they are either off or have called in sick. The Lynxes have also been absent from dinner three days in a row, their table standing empty in the opulent hall.

I take a tray of champagne and glasses to the group of guests I’ve been serving tonight. They sit near the stage where metal poles have been installed so exotic dancers can perform for the audience tonight. I’ve recognized a lot of the VIPs on this cruise thanks to my disguise as Mong, though most of them leave before they can get sufficiently drunk, which has impeded my investigation.

They never talk about the drug either, or at least that’s true for those I walk by while serving food and drinks. Another thing I have noticed is that guests always reserve the same table, but they don’t always have dinner here.

Is that normal? The public part of the ship offers plenty of restaurant options, entertainment too, but people like these thrive for exclusivity. And it can’t get more exclusive than sipping cocktails in a part of the ship that only the top among the top can enter.

That’s another thing I’ve discovered—not all of the masked guests can come in here. I don’t know what this means yet, but I intend to find out.

I finish the unfortunately uneventful shift and head back. Hex throws himself at me when I enter our cabin, and it would be a lie to say that I don’t enjoy it. I do, very much so. And when he kisses me on the lips like we are a married couple, my heart almost jumps out of my chest.

This wasn’t supposed to happen, yet my own body betrays me as it soaks up his warmth and makes me feel like I’m flying. For the past couple days, I’ve been keeping busy and focusing on our mission, but he still finds ways to snuggle up to me, or cuddle or kiss me. And I just don’t have it in me to push him away when it’s such a bliss being on the receiving end of his affectionate smiles.

So I’ve moved my goalpost. Once this is over and we are back in Nagoya, I’ll put some distance between us and regain control of my desires. And until then… Hex pushes his tongue inside my mouth and shoves his hand into my briefs, making me groan. Well, until then, I guess I am allowed to get carried away a bit more.

“What are you doing?” I demand, panting and fighting to stop my hips from bucking.

“Trying to get into your pants?” Hex says proudly, smirking at me. “I missed you.”

I’ll never confess this out loud, but he’s the dorkiest, most charming, most endearing and most beautiful man that exists on this earth. He’s the opposite of me—pure sunshine while I am all-encompassing darkness—and I don’t deserve him. I’ve done things normal people have nightmares about, I’ve fought in conflicts, I’ve killed. I’m not ashamed of that—it’s part of who I am—but I also know that there must be someone more suited for Hex.

Someone good like him, who lives in the light and doesn’t lurk in the shadows.

Being the Akiyama Group’s CSO has given me more opportunities to do what I’m good at, even if I no longer get my hands dirty. Hex knows that, yet he’s never cared. He helps the yakuza when I ask him to, he’s even made friends with them now. I’ve tainted him with the evil of my world, and yet he continues to shine brightly.

“Aran. You got really quiet.” He pauses the kisses he’s been trailing down my neck and aims those disarming eyes at me. “Is everything okay? Or did something happen?”

You happened. And I have no idea what to do with the part of me that wants to cling to you for as long as you’ll let me. It compromises my resolve, it drains the fight out of me. I want to be yours, hell, I already am, but I can’t seem to be able to accept that. Maybe it’s silly, your dad might even laugh at me if he was here, but you are a star in the sky and I am the grass on earth which would be dead without your light. You don’t need me, but I can’t survive without you. It’s always been like this, even if you don’t realize it.

“None of the women Mong described showed up tonight either. The Lynxes weren’t there as well,” I say, shaking Hex off.

I take off the uniform vest and hang it, then enter the lounge where Mong is watching something on the TV. His eyes meet mine, hopeful for a heartbeat until I shake my head and extinguish the flicker of light in them.

“Still nothing on both Katy and Eleanor.” I lower myself to one of the chairs around the dining table and reach for the bowl that’s been cling-wrapped. Judging by the mutilated pieces of various fruits inside, Hex must’ve been the one to prepare it. Sighing at my day of no results, I stab a piece of melon or apple with my fork and bring it to my mouth. “It feels like we’ve hit a dead end.”

It unnerves me. Nothing has been happening, and that’s just not right because we’re here for a reason. The experimental drug trail led us here. The guests on this cruise are all involved, corporation CEOs, heirs, billionaires, politicians. Something is brewing and we have only one week to figure out what.

“I tried Eleanor’s phone again, but no matter how many times I ping it, I can’t get a location,” Hex says, his voice laden with disappointment.

“And she hasn’t used it?”

He hugs himself. “No. Which is strange. No one stays away from their phone for three days!”

He’s correct about that. We rely so much on these little devices that it’s hard to imagine a day of no usage, let alone three. Unless she had no physical access to it for some reason. Like if something happened to her, for example.

I’d considered that, but we haven’t heard anything about accidents either. If something had happened to a passenger, security would at least be briefed about it, so an investigation can be undertaken. It’s standard procedure, even in the case where another person wasn’t involved, as it helps identify potentially dangerous equipment, structural issues, faulty procedures and systems.

Hex sits on the chair opposite me and yawns. I peek at the time. It’s just past twelve, so it’s understandable that he’s tired. He and Mong have been trying to hack into that secondary network for the past days while also monitoring the primary one for any mentions of the two women.

“No staying up late tonight,” I declare as I pop the last bit of fruit salad into my mouth. I steal a glance at Mong, who’s already half-asleep. “And that goes for both of you.”

“Hex said we needed to do some further testing of that algorithm he tweaked,” Mong says, a yawn tearing out of him.

“Yeah, that’s right…”

“Hex needs sleep. And so do you.” And because I know that Hex’s rebellious nature has been rubbing off on Mong, I add, “My security shift overlaps with yours and I might need you to cover for a bit. Attending the daily briefing in the control room should suffice, as Hex can loop the security footage for my area.”

The man’s eyes shine with excitement. “You’re letting me out in the field, Colonel?”

Colonel ? I aim a quick scowl Hex’s way, but he just gives me a look . We are still posing as CIA agents I suppose, but devolving this kind of personal information is highly unnecessary. Then again, Hex is the type to go home or go all out, so I can’t really blame him. Plus, he seems to have taken a liking to Mong, in a friendly way, and Hex is rarely wrong when it comes to picking the people he’s willing to trust.

He’s an airhead at times, a bit oblivious and can be na?ve, but he does know how to choose his actual friends.

“Oh, um, Hex told me you were an army officer before you two started working for the CIA in America,” Mong volunteers when I keep frowning at Hex. He even salutes me. “That’s so amazing. You two must be super smart to get scouted by a foreign authority.”

We work and live in America now? Couldn’t he have said we’re collaborating with the National Intelligence Agency or something? Whatever, it doesn’t matter. The important thing is that I quickly shut down this line of conversation before our backstory gets too incredulous.

“Yes, we are very capable agents. But all of us also need rest, as we have a long day ahead of us.”

Another salute and Mong positions himself horizontally on the couch. I take that as my cue to herd Hex into the bedroom. Surprisingly, he complies without protesting, padding across the granite floor until he disappears inside our room.

I wish Mong a good night and sling by the bathroom for a quick shower. Then I join Hex in the bedroom.

I tried not to think about what took place last time we were together and alone. Thanks to the late nights they’ve been pulling while attempting to hack into the secondary network, Hex has been passing out on the couch in the lounge, next to Mong, so the memories have been easy to block out. But tonight, that won’t be possible because he’s here with me.

I can feel his presence the moment I enter the bedroom and close the door. He’s left one of the strip lights on the dimmed setting, giving the room a relaxing ambience. The couch that I have been sleeping on hasn’t been touched this time, but my pillow has been moved from it to the empty side of the bed. On the other one, Hex has propped himself against the headboard with a tablet in hand.

He’s so focused on whatever he’s doing that he only notices me when I approach the bed so I can take my pillow.

“What are you doing?” he asks, blinking those eyes at me in confusion.

I tip my chin at the couch. “Going to sleep.”

He puts the tablet on the nightstand and pats the empty side of the bed. “Go on then.”

“I meant over there .”

Now he angles his head to one side and glowers at the couch as if it’s the police crashing his birthday party. It happened when he turned eighteen because he insisted he wanted to organize his own celebration. He’d insisted he was a mature adult now who didn’t need babysitting, so I’d caved. Suffice to say, inviting an entire club full of strangers and blasting music from your apartment at twelve a.m. didn’t go all that well. Not to mention the headache I got trying to explain that the copious amount of light drugs didn’t belong to Hex, but to some idiot kid who’d decided to make some money at the party.

“But I want to cuddle,” he says sweetly, smothering my heart with giddy warmth. “Please?”

Someone have mercy on me. How do I say no to that when it makes me feel like I’m a bubble about to burst?

I take a deep breath and remind myself that once we leave this ship I will be in control of myself again. I will be strong and I won’t be swayed by his lovely smiles and puppy eyes and full lips. I will forget his scent and his taste and we will revert back to how things were before this shitshow began.

“I promise I will one hundred thousand percent behave.”

I doubt that, and not just because of the mischievous grin that replaces his pleading smile. But I still do as he wishes, because, really, I am powerless to say no when the offer he’s made me is just so enticing.