Page 35 of Whisper Pretty Lies (Lust & Liars #1)

EvanAnn

Dinner is awkward. Maybe not for anyone else, but I can’t seem to get out of my head. Did Damon seriously stop me from kissing my boyfriend, or was I projecting? Do I not want to kiss Chase?

We’ve made out. We kiss. We haven’t done more than that. It shouldn’t feel wrong to kiss my boyfriend. I definitely shouldn’t feel guilty about kissing him. Fuck, my head is so screwed up.

Mia keeps up a running dialogue about the hockey game, the guys, and how they won. She found a website with all the guys’ names, positions, and stats. Hockey is, after all, her new favorite sport.

Tanner participates in the game talk, but turns to talk to Chase when Mia begins cataloging the guys and which ones she’s planning on going after at the party. Seems like Liam Massery is top of her list, along with Fletcher McIntyre, if she can’t have the Devil’s trio.

My stomach turns when she talks about the Devil’s trio. They could fuck a different girl every night, and I have no right to tell them not to. They aren’t my boyfriends.

“You don’t mind if I make some moves tonight, do you?” Mia asks. “I need to work my way into their beds.”

I shrug. “I’ll be fine.”

I’m used to being on my own at parties. Even when I’m around Chase, he usually focuses on his friends. Occasionally, I find another ant to talk to.

Tanner gets Mia’s attention, and Chase touches my arm. “Do you want me to give you a ride tonight? It might be nice to have some alone time.”

Part of me wants to say yes because this is my boyfriend. The guy I’m supposed to be making out with. But the other part of me doesn’t know what to think or which way is up.

Was it a coincidence Damon hit the boards when Chase and I were going to kiss? What’s his plan with all those videos of me? My world’s been flipped upside down.

I want to pretend living with Damon isn’t real, so I can’t let Chase give me a ride home. Not if I want to maintain the illusion that nothing has changed. That I won’t go home and end up sleeping in practically the same room as Damon.

I don’t have any way to lock him out, unless I also lock him out of his room. Interior door locks wouldn’t keep him out. The image of Damon looking down on me while I slept plays through my head. Did he do that last night?

It’s terrifying I didn’t know he was in my room. He could have done anything to me in my sleep. My body heats, but I ignore it.

If I tell Chase what’s happening with moving and Hawk, Damon, and Cam, what would Damon have to hold over my head? Sharing the video with the school? Nothing really happened.

Fuck, what were Chase and I talking about? Driving me home. Yeah, that’s not happening until I figure out what’s really on the line. Of course, the longer I keep the fact I’m living at Damon’s a secret, the more Chase might be hurt when it comes out.

“Mia can get me home. I know you like to hang out with your friends later than I usually want to stay.” I touch his hand. “Besides, I might be coming down with something and I’d hate to get you sick.”

“Yeah, with the play, I can’t afford to get sick.” He pulls away from me. “I’ll make sure you have some vitamin C to keep you well.”

“Thanks.” I’m so fucking confused. This is my boyfriend, but why does it feel like I’m cheating when I’m touching him, and not the other way around? I definitely feel guilty.

As we eat dinner, they talk around me while I’m spinning out thinking about the Devil’s trio and how they have me ensnared in their web. They’ll be there tonight at the party. I’ve watched them disappear with girls before. It’s what they do.

My chest burns and I resist the urge to rub at it.

I have no right to say anything about them hooking up with other girls. I’m dating Chase and they’re single. Besides, it’s not like I could date them all. Even if that was an option, they don’t date anyone. That’s part of the allure for most girls.

But me? Could I be with guys with no commitment or fidelity?

All three of them? Has any girl been with all of them? That hasn’t happened from what I’ve heard. I might live under a rock, but even I hear about their sexual conquests.

Mia told me about the time she fucked two guys at once.

Have they thought about sharing a girl between them?

And now I’m thinking about all three fucking me.

I mean, three could be possible, right? My brain stalls out, because they’re intense, even one-on-one.

All three of them would be overwhelming.

Mind-blowing.

Shivers crawl down my spine. That’s not normal, right? I shouldn’t be considering how to fuck three guys, when I haven’t even fucked one. But they make me curious and ache for more. My cheeks flush when Chase touches my arm and smiles at me.

Does he know what I’m thinking about? Is it written all over my face? I should tell him and get it over with, so we can figure out where to go from here.

But I don’t.

We finish up dinner and head out to the vehicles. I ended up driving the BMW over to Mia’s and leaving it there. She won’t question why I have that car, because she doesn’t really know me that well.

Chase starts to wrap his arm around my waist and then decides against it as we walk to his truck. I resist rolling my eyes.

“What happened to your car?” I ask as we climb in. Mia and Tanner wouldn’t have to drive separately if he had his car. We also could have fit in Mia’s car, but Chase refused to sit in the back seat.

“In for repairs. The parts are taking forever to get in. There were scratches all down the side. Hit some animal, probably.”

My brow furrows as I put on my seatbelt. “You didn’t go back to see what you hit and if it was okay?”

Chase glances my way before starting the truck. “It was dark and late. I doubt I could have found whatever I hit anyway. Probably ran off. It’s not a big deal.”

He turns on the radio like he always does when he doesn’t want to continue the conversation. I’ve noticed it before, but now it bothers me.

What kind of person hits an animal and doesn’t go back to check on it?

The party is at Fletcher’s house. He hosts a lot of parties. We’ve come here a few times during the summer. Chase parks the truck, sighs, and turns to me.

“I’m sorry, babe. I’m stressing over this part in Othello . Maybe I should have gone back, but I can’t do anything about it now.” Chase looks like he’s actually sorry, but something inside me doesn’t believe him.

He is an actor and he’s a good one. How much of everything he gives me is an act?

Does Damon have proof Chase is cheating on me? Or is he just playing with my head?

Chase reaches across the console and touches my jaw. “I wish you were feeling better. It feels like we have even less time to be together now.”

Technically, we didn’t have to do anything today.

If he wanted alone time, we could have hung out instead of going to the hockey game, and we certainly don’t have to go to this party.

It was a choice he made. If he wanted alone time, maybe he should try scheduling that instead of tacking it on at the end of other plans.

My door opens before I can say anything.

Mia smiles. “Come on, bestie. I’m ready for my first party as an ant.”

“Ant. That’s stupid.” Tanner leans against the side of the truck with his hands in his pockets. He’s an attractive guy, which isn’t surprising given he’s Mia’s twin. He gives me strange vibes though. If he weren’t her brother, I don’t think I’d want to hang out with him.

“You’re stupid.” She sticks her tongue out at him. “At least I don’t have to deal with the horsemen. I still don’t understand why you didn’t transfer to Deimos. You could have played football here.”

Tanner looks away from Mia. “I have plans for this year.”

Mia rolls her eyes and takes my hand to help me out of the truck. Chase has already walked around the back.

“Careful, Mia. Evan’s coming down with something. You don’t want to get it.” Chase jerks his chin toward the house that’s all lit up. We can hear the music from two houses away.

“Are you sick?” Mia leans in as Tanner falls into step with Chase.

“Maybe a little.” I hate lying. My gut twists as I say it. I don’t think you get anywhere you want to be by lying, but right now, there’s so much at stake. Kissing my boyfriend shouldn’t be an issue. I should want to.

“We’ll get you a screwdriver. Orange juice and vodka. The perfect cure-all.” She hooks her arm in mine. “We’re going to have so much fun.”

The party is in full swing when we walk in. Mia keeps ahold of me, but the minute we step inside, the crowd swallows Tanner and Chase. I’m not worried. Chase usually heads to the pool area where they play beer pong. He knows I have Mia to hang out with this time.

“Mia!” Abby separates from the mass of dancing teens and walks over to us. She gives me a once-over before saying less enthusiastically, “EvanAnn.”

I have on jeans and a t-shirt with a jacket. It’s nothing fancy. Or slutty, which I did judge Mia’s outfit a little when we met up. She’s in a skirt that barely covers her ass and a crop top that hugs her breasts. But she’s my friend and can do whatever she wants.

“Hi, Abby.” Mia doesn’t release me. “What’s good tonight?”

“They’ve got a keg, but you need to dance with us.” Abby grabs Mia’s other hand. “Come on.”

Mia turns to me with hopeful, excited eyes. “Evan?”

“I don’t dance.” I shrug, like it doesn’t matter that I’ll be left alone at the party. “You should go ahead.”

Mia turns to Abby. “Let me grab a drink and I’ll be back, okay?”

Abby glances at me, but then grins at Mia. “Yeah, I’ll see you over there.”

She disappears into the bodies on the dance floor.

“Come on.” Mia drags me toward the back of the house.

“You should go dance. I’ll be okay.” I’m used to being left to my own devices at parties. Chase tends to play beer pong, leaving me to people watch. It works out.

Mia pulls me into her side as people surge around us. “You’re my bestie. That means I stick to you like glue. Unless I’m hitting on a hockey guy, then we’ll figure it out.”