Page 11 of Where Quiet Hearts Scream (Dark Hearts #3)

S erafina

I didn’t know happiness could feel like this.

Like a warm expanse across my chest, radiating out from my heart, filling me with fluttering creatures, lifting my feet off the ground. I feel as though I’m literally floating and it’s a lightness I haven’t experienced before in my life.

Perhaps I did before Mama was killed—I can’t remember. But definitely not since.

And I can’t think about that today.

Not when my older sister Trilby is twirling around with the biggest smile on her face and the most beautiful, glittering bridal gown swirling about her feet.

I roll my eyes softly at the disheveled state of her hair.

It took me practically two days to curl and coif her hair into that style, but the non-stop dancing has teased out more than a few strands.

My gaze coasts to Papa and my heart stutters.

Our beloved father looks happier than I’ve seen him in a long time.

And the woman who’s captured his full attention also looks enamored.

Trilby said she’s one of Cristiano’s aunts and the mother of one of his capo’s.

And she’s stunning. Long, thick dark hair styled like something out of a hair salon commercial.

Flawless olive skin and almond-shaped eyes.

She stands a couple inches taller than Papa but she’s wearing heels and he certainly doesn’t seem to mind.

An awareness of grief shifts inside me. I want Papa to be happy, I really do, but I’m just not ready to acknowledge that Mama has really gone. It’s been seven years. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready.

A dusky pink flourish pulls my gaze to the right and my eyes nearly pop out of my head. I sensed something was going on between Contessa and Benito, but holy crap... He’s scooped her up into his arms and they’re staring into each other’s eyes as though they’re deeply in love or something.

My brow creases. I know they’ve been hanging out at the Di Santo’s but it wasn’t that long ago she despised him.

She doesn’t seem to despise him anymore.

Quite the opposite in fact. She’s laughing at something he’s just said.

His fingers are splayed across her back, holding her close to him.

My cheeks heat as though I’m trespassing on someone’s private moment, yet they’re at the side of the dance floor so anyone could see them .

With a timid smile, Tess slides Benito’s tie from the collar of his shirt and loops it around her neck, then he whispers something into her ear making her blush.They’re in a complete bubble, oblivious to the fact a couple hundred people are dancing around them.

I look away timidly, in case anyone might catch me prying into my younger sister’s business, but I can’t avert my eyes for long.

When I glance back at them, Benito has pushed a hand up through Tess’s hair and is pulling her mouth onto his.

My heart stops as they kiss each other openly in front of our family and the Di Santo’s.

I then realize with dread I’m not the only person who’s noticed.

I hope Tess knows she’s basically just signed her own marriage certificate.

This makes me anxious. Tess is younger than me.

If Papa was of a mind to arrange marriages for all his daughters now that we’re bound to the Di Santo mafia family, I should be the next in line to be married.

If Tess really has just signed away her single life with that kiss, what does it mean for me?

I look across at Papa and note with relief he doesn’t seem to have witnessed Tess and Benito’s PDA.

He’s still deep in conversation with the mother of Cristiano’s capo.

I don’t want to be married off to someone I don’t know.

I certainly don’t want to be betrothed to a mobster .

I love my sisters to bits, and Cristiano and Benito, on the face of it, are attractive and charming.

Disarmingly so. But I don’t understand why Trilby and Tess would choose to be a part of this life .

My exposure to the life of a mafia wife is limited, for sure, but to be around so much death and blood… to be chaperoned everywhere they go by a team of security… to not enjoy a normal life… I cannot think of anything worse.

I take a step back into a concealed corner and take my phone out of my purse. Safe in the shadows I unlock it and pull up my photos. Instantly, my whole body warms.

I’d caught Andrew just as the sun was setting, making his black hair glow copper and softening his almost brutally dark eyes.

His lips are curved into a half smile, and the angle of the sunlight throws shadows beneath his unapologetically sharp cheekbones.

I still can’t believe what this man did for me.

I’ve had a couple weeks to think about this, and I don’t think my panic attack came on because I couldn’t handle the violence of Andrew dropping those two men to the ground. I think it came on when I realized he’d done it for me.

No one has ever done anything like that for me.

And then helping me to breathe through my panic attack.

The second my palm connected with his heart, I was filled with warmth and conviction.

Then he rested his forehead against mine for a second time, and I could have sworn he was going to kiss me.

I would have let him too. Guest or no guest. In that moment, and in every moment since, I was, and am, in deep crush mode.

Not only has he given me something to fixate upon, but since meeting him, my thoughts haven’t strayed to the dark corners of my psyche once.

I know it’s going to be a long journey, and it’s part of the reason I moved out here, but I’m finally healing.

And Andrew, unbeknown to him, has played a small part in that.

“I’ll take a truck load of whatever is making you smile like that, please.”

My heart thumps and I look up to see Aunt Allegra standing before me with an arched brow and questioning look on her face.

I swipe my thumb across the screen. “Just pictures of Tril walking down the aisle,” I say, holding up the phone to show her one of several hundred photos I’ve snapped in the last few hours. “She looks so happy and radiant.”

Allegra wraps an arm around me, tugging my body into hers. “She does,” she says with a happy sigh. “And it’s about time. Trilby deserves some true happiness after everything she’s been through.”

I can’t help but feel a trickle of bitterness work its way through my blood stream.

Of course Trilby was going to be more damaged than any of us, having been in the car with Mama when she was killed.

But why she had to fall for a mob man—the same ilk as the men who took our mother from us—I will never understand.

The same bitterness sinks deeper when I notice Benito pull Tess through the terrace doors and head down toward the beach.

Is this it now? Are we each destined to be mafia wives? Including Bambi who’s still in high school? I swallow and push my phone back inside my purse. The truth floods my veins with a conviction that unnerves me.

I would rather die than marry a mob man.

“I’m proud of you, honey.”

Allegra’s words filter through the red haze clouding my vision.

“You’ve really made a life for yourself out here.

It’s obvious the manager values you, and you look happy and healthy—glowing even.

If I didn’t know better I’d say you’d fallen in love with a man, but it’s clearly your new life you’ve fallen in love with. ”

I stop breathing and hope it calms the flow of blood to my cheeks. Fallen in love with a man? Maybe I have.

“I’ve really missed you at home but it makes me feel better to see how happy you are and how your new life suits you.”

“Thanks Allegra. I miss you all too but I do love it out here.”

“So, you think you’ll stay in the Hamptons?

” Her tone is contorted into something like regret and I can tell by her expression she’d rather I was home.

It looks as though it won’t be long before Tess flies the nest, and if Bambi’s late night texts to me are any indication, the relationship between my aunt and my youngest sister is growing taut.

I hate feeling responsible for how anyone else is feeling—I don’t handle it very well, so I do what I always do and blame the stars.

“According to my horoscope, it isn’t likely I’ll return to Washington Port,” I say with a sympathetic smile .

Her lips purse. “You’re still reading those things?” she asks, tightly.

Allegra has never approved of my interest in astrology and tarot so I half-expected this.

“If by ‘those things’ you mean astrological progressions that I calculate with mathematical precision, and haven’t failed me so far, then yes.”

She shakes her head slowly. “Serafina, you know how nervous I get when you use that nonsense to make decisions about your life. If you want to come home, you can come home. You don’t have to do everything those silly charts supposedly tell you.”

I take a careful breath. “But that’s the idea. I turn to my charts when I don’t know what decision to make—when I’m unsure either way. I don’t use them to dictate how I live my entire life.”

Allegra’s tipped chin and furrowed brow tell me she isn’t convinced. “So, where will you go from here?” she asks with a resigned sigh.

“Who says I’ll move on from here?” I shrug. “All I’ve seen is I won’t be returning home. I might stay here. That’s certainly my preferred option at the moment.”

An image of Andrew’s face flashes across my lids and I have to bite my cheek to stop a smile from forming.

Sure, our relationship has been platonic, but he bought me flowers, took me to lunch and mowed down two men who wouldn’t leave me alone.

Not to mention the way he listens intensely to every word I say.

He somehow makes me feel like I’m the most fascinating person in the world.

Allegra’s face falls though, flooding me with guilt.