Page 66 of Waiting for Acceptance (Nashville Nights #5)

LAUREN

I barely made it into a taxi before completely breaking down after leaving Fitz standing in the hallway at his mom’s birthday party.

I know him far too well and he would have thrown everything he’s been working so hard for away if he’d known what his parents were up to.

I know he’ll find out eventually, and when he does I want his decision, whether it be to take on his new company with Jessica, or to leave it all behind, to be made with a clear mind.

I don’t want him to lose what he’s meant to inherit because he feels like he has to choose me or his career.

I’ve never been that girl, and I won’t start now just because I’ve fallen in love.

Becoming CEO has been his plan all along, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I knew I was what stood in his way.

Gran even said it herself, he’s great at what he does. He deserves this.

I grab my phone out of my clutch and call the only person I can think of right now.

“Chattahoochies, what’s your poison?” A sob breaks out of me at the sound of her voice and she immediately knows it’s me. “Max. I’m taking this in the office.” I hear her tell him, then a few minutes later she’s back.

“What’s the matter? What happened?” I can’t even speak. I just cry my eyes out on the phone with her for at least five minutes, and she just listens. Reminding me to breathe when I get close to hyperventilating.

“I don’t even know where to start,” I admit.

“Okay, well…if he hurt you, just know he won’t live to see the end of the year.”

“He didn’t hurt me. I—I broke up with him.” The words burn my throat when I say them.

“What?!” I take a deep breath, almost losing it all over again when we pull up to his apartment building and I look down at the key he got made for me this weekend.

“I have to pack and get on a plane. I just…needed to cry.”

“Come straight to my house when you land. I’ll have everything we need. I love you, Lu, and I am so sorry you’re hurting right now when I can’t squeeze you. Please text me updates as you can.” I nod my head even though she can’t see me.

“I will. I love you too.”

I haven’t stopped crying since I got into the taxi in New York.

I cried the entire time I packed my bags, leaving behind everything that wasn’t a necessity, including the key I used for the first time when I got there to leave.

Then I cried through the entire wait at the airport while I changed my wallpaper and hid all the photos of Fitz and me in my phone, only stopping when I fell asleep on the plane.

I’ve been a zombie ever since I landed, barely remembering ordering my Uber from the airport to Ruby’s house.

I text her that I’m here since it’s currently three in the morning and I didn’t want Maverick to wake anyone.

Two minutes later the door swings open and the tears start falling again.

“I miss him already.” My voice is hoarse from crying so much and she holds onto me so tight it’s like she’s trying to keep me from physically falling apart, the way my heart already has.

“I know, sweetie. I know.” She runs her hand through my hair, and we stand in the doorway while I cry a little more. “Come on. I have wine and snacks. You can tell me what happened at your own pace.”

We curl up on the couch, bundled in blankets, while New Girl plays in the background. Our wine glasses are full, there’s a new box of Kleenex on the coffee table, and her attention is solely on me.

“So I guess I should start by telling you the truth.” She frowns at me and I feel the nerves spark to life in my stomach. “When Fitz and I started dating, it was all…fake.”

“Fake?!” Her eyes pop in surprise.

“Yeah. You remember when he was my date to Taylor’s wedding? He did that as a favor because I didn’t want to go alone.”

“Lauren.” She tilts her head sympathetically.

“I know. It’s so embarrassing thinking about it now, but he offered, and I said yes. When he said I would owe him, I thought he meant something work-related but he came back the next day and asked me to be his girlfriend for a year to get his parents off his back.”

“Off his back about what? Being single?”

“I wondered the same thing, but apparently they wanted him to end up with some hotel heiress so the companies could collaborate or merge or something. I don’t know, but I met the girl and I could see why he didn’t want to be with her. So we played the part and we played it well,” I say sadly.

“So then what happened?”

I shrug, feeling the emotion creep back up my throat.

“It stopped feeling fake.” She stays silent as I try to regain my composure.

“I fell for him, Ruby. I fell so hard. I thought he was just some rich dick that would keep my parents from trying to set me up with random guys whose texts gave me the ick, but he wasn’t.

He was everything I’ve ever wanted and never had.

He made me feel…” Hot tears stream down my face.

“He accepted me for who I was. He loved me, exactly as I was. The bratty attitude, thrift shopping, horrible parents, workaholic that has a cat and friends who are a dealbreaker, and he never made me feel anything but wanted.”

“Shit,” she whispers, making me laugh ironically. “So then… Why did you leave?” I meet her eyes and anger and sadness overwhelm me.

“His parents won’t sign the company over to him unless he’s with someone from their world . Basically, someone who can offer him more.”

“Something more than love? Love so deep that you’d leave him and break your own heart in the process just so he doesn’t lose everything he’s worked his whole life for?” I’m filled with gratitude for the way she recognizes how fucking hard this has been.

“They don't care about love, Ruby. They care about status, climbing the corporate ladder, and making sure he stays at the top. From what I gathered at least.” She sits with the information for a minute, then looks at me.

“Do you actually think he’ll do it?”

“What?”

“Marry someone else just to take over the company?” My heart cracks straight down the middle at the very mention of it.

“I don’t know.” I take another long sip of my wine.

She tilts her head, looking at me expectantly. “Lauren.”

“What?”

“Think back over the last few months, and tell me if the man you fell in love with would really marry someone else just for his career.”

“I don’t want to think about it, Ruby. I just want to go to sleep and wake up from this nightmare.” She gives me a sympathetic look and nods.

“I’m sorry. Get some sleep. I can’t guarantee the nightmare will be gone when you wake up, but I’ll be here when you do.

” We snuggle up on her couch, turning the volume up on the TV and I silently cry myself to sleep.

Because while I know I made the right choice in leaving, the choice to not be selfish and give Fitz the space he needs to make a clear-minded decision about what he wants for his future, my heart is still scattered in a million pieces all over New York.

And the only person who could pick them up, is still there as well.

And is now calling me for the fifteenth time since I left him at that party.

“I’m not going to wake her up.” The sound of Ruby whispering wakes me, but I can’t manage to open my eyes.

“Well, it’s not fair that you got to nurse her broken heart by yourself last night. You should have called us.” Taylor’s unmistakable voice catches my attention next. “I work the night shift, I’m used to dealing with unstable patients on very little sleep.”

“Okay, well I’m sorry you guys, but she cried herself to sleep last night so she’s probably exhausted. I’m not waking her.”

“You already did, you troll. You can’t whisper for shit. And I’m not unstable.” I groan, pulling myself to sit up on the couch, seeing Taylor, Shane, and Leah standing in the kitchen with Ruby, coffee, and breakfast bags in hand.

“Hiiii,” Taylor coos. “Of course you’re not.” I roll my eyes at her as she hands me a coffee, then my face turns down and my lip starts quivering.

“Maybe I’m a little unstable.” I shove the coffee back at Taylor and I can see the confusion on her face.

“What the hell did you do?” Shane whispers, not so quietly.

“I handed her her favorite coffee,” she answers cautiously.

I take a deep breath, grabbing one of the tissues from the almost empty box.

“He paid attention to what I liked, you know? Like, for so long I thought he was up my ass at work to piss me off, but then—” I take a few shaky, sniffly breaths.

“Then he took me to get tacos one night and then started bringing me my favorite coffee. It’s a hard order to remember, you know?

” They all shake their heads, even though I probably sound insane right now, rubbing my arms in a comforting way while I lose it over a fucking cup of coffee.

“What happened, sweetie?” Shane asks, and I motion for Ruby to tell them because I physically do not have it in me to go through everything again. It hurts too much.

“So she left him, to make sure he didn’t lose everything,” Ruby concludes.

Well, shit. It hurts just as much hearing it as it does saying it.

“Well, lucky for you, we’re all free as a flock of birds today and we’re going to do whatever you want. Manicure? Pedicure? Day drinking? You name it,” Leah says, brushing my hair out of my face. I roll my head and look at her.

“Re-start last night’s episode. I am part of this couch now.” They all give me a sad, yet understanding look. “And give me my coffee.” Taylor hands me the coffee then picks up the box of tissues, handing it over as well.

“Just in case,” she whispers with a wink, pulling my legs into her lap and snuggling up next to me as the curls from her messy bun flop around.

The rest of the girls pile onto the couch, and we stay there for the rest of the day.

Tank brings us food and informs me that he’s fed Ginny for me.

Hendrix snuggles me and brings me his favorite stuffy to make me feel better, and my girls don’t leave until they absolutely have to.

They’re the truest form of family I’ve ever had.