Page 98 of Vipers and Vendettas

They both look stricken by my words.

‘I’m sorry,’ I say, ‘I want to trust that this is real, that you won’t … treat me the way you did before. But it’s too much, too soon. I need time.’

‘Of course,’ Maddox says, stepping away from me.

The link between us begins to fade again, and I follow him across the room in alarm, grabbing his arm.

‘No, not that,’ I plead. ‘I need to feel you like I do the others. Don’t take it away. Please!’

‘I won’t,’ he vows immediately, his eyes searching mine. ‘I won’t bury it again.’

I wince because that’s exactly what I did to the others when I left. I buried the links, turned them off. I thought it would make things easier for them when I left. But did I cause Jayce, Krase, Axel, and Iron to feel like this?

‘Stop it,’ Maddox says low, taking my face in his hands. ‘I can feel the guilt eating you up inside. But, trust me, pet. Whatever you think you did to the clan, we did worse to you by far.’

I look up at him. ‘Do you really think that’s true?’

‘You can feel my honesty in my words,’ he replies, ‘and that’s because itistrue. We will spend the rest of our days making the past months up to you for as long as you’ll have us.’

My brow furrows. ‘So I could leave,’ I say quietly. ‘If I wanted to, I could go and take the baby with me?’

‘Of course,’ Maddox says readily. ‘I meant what I said. If you’re unhappy here after the baby comes, we’ll give you whatever you need to make a life elsewhere in safety, away from us, if you wish it.’

I don’t want that. I don’t say it, but I can sense his relief as he feels it.

‘We still need to teach you to feed with intent, with control,’ he says quietly. ‘I’m sorry if this isn't the right time, but you’re just going to get hungrier and hungrier.’

‘Does it have to be now?’

He nods. ‘It’s for you and Jellybean’s safety, Jules, not to mention the others who work on the estate. It’s non-negotiable.’

‘What are the signs?’ I ask.

‘First, it will hurt here.’ He puts a warm hand on my upper stomach. ‘It’ll get worse and worse the longer your hunger isn’t satisfied. After that, you may not be able to stop yourself from feeding from someone close by who’sunwilling. Someone like Tabitha. Do you understand?’

The gravitas in his tone has me nodding vigorously, my eyes wide. ‘I don’t want to hurt anyone.’

‘Then you need to learn as soon as possible.’

He steps close to me again, and I see Daemon out of the corner of my eye. He moves behind me.

‘If you can feel me, you know that this isn’t some cruel game we’re playing. Could we try this again?’ Maddox asks. ‘We can stop the moment you want to.’

He tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear, and I take a breath, feeling the bridge between us. I sense honesty and the forthrightness I’ve come to expect from Maddox in all of our dealings. There’s no shadowy duplicity, and even though Daemon and I don’t have a connection like I do with the others, I know Maddox will stay true to his word. Nothing is going to happen here that I don’t want.

‘Teach me how to do it,’ I say.

‘Good girl,’ Daemon growls low in my ear as he steps close, sandwiching me between them. He’s completely dressed and wearing gloves, so his skin doesn’t touch mine anywhere.

I tense a little, especially when both sets of hands begin to trail lightly around my body, eliciting little gasps here and there as they explore me.

‘First,’ Maddox whispers, ‘you need to learn to feel the sexual energy you need. You’ll begin to notice it, see it.’

‘What does it look like?’ I manage to gasp out.

‘To me, it’s like tiny rose petals in the wind,’ Maddox replies, and Daemon chuckles.

‘I can’t see it at all,’ he murmurs in my ear.