Page 12

CHAPTER

TWELVE

The fire was smoldering when they got back to the clearing. People were drifting back toward the house, shooting nervous glances into the trees and at the few who were drunk enough to stay out there.

Felicity was passed out against a tree. A puddle of vomit lay next to her.

Kade sighed. “Classic Felicity party.”

Theo nodded, stomping out the last of the embers from the fire. He was usually gone by this point in the night but would hear the stories. Aaron always tried to keep them to a minimum, viciously tearing down anyone he caught spreading gossip, but they leaked through anyway.

Kade reached out with his boot, dragging Felicity’s skirt down where it was riding up. “What next? You take the legs, I take her arms?”

Theo bent down and hoisted her over his shoulder, gratified when he heard her let out a queasy grumble. He was pissed off and more than a little betrayed that she hadn’t told him about the hunter shit, but he wasn’t about to leave her unconscious in the woods.

“Or we can do that,” Kade said, falling into step beside him.

Theo gave his classmates a cautious look. There were only a few of them, and far enough away none of them had noticed Theo yet.

He gestured for Kade to leave. “Meet me at the car.”

Kade snorted. He pulled a cigarette carton out of his pocket and lit up.

“Right,” he said sourly. “Still pretending like we don’t know each other. Even though a lot of people just saw me chase you through the woods, which nobody will think is suspicious at all .”

“Just…” Theo turned, wincing when he almost slung Felicity’s legs into Kade’s face. “Sorry. Look, I parked down the street. Go stand by the Lexus and smoke.”

Kade groaned loudly enough that Theo glanced worriedly at their classmates, who were busy trying and failing to climb trees.

“Got it,” Kade said flatly. He turned and headed toward the edge of the forest. Theo watched him go, keeping his eyes on Kade until he reached the path that led out onto the street. Right at the last second, he spotted Kade dig a bottle out of his jacket and take a sip .

Theo had to fight the urge to speed up the stairs to Felicity’s room. Everyone who noticed Theo gave him a sympathetic nod or quickly pretended not to see him, all the while whispering to their friends about how Theo was at Felicity’s party the week his dad died, wasn’t that weird ?

Theo placed Felicity face down on her bed. Theo had read about rock stars drowning in their own vomit from sleeping on their back while drunk. He didn’t know if Felicity was drunk enough for that, but he wasn’t taking any chances.

Felicity nuzzled into her pillow, smearing makeup into the material. She mumbled something unintelligible, then she started snoring.

Theo took out the sun necklace Kade had given him. He pressed his thumb into one of its sharp points, wondering about all the secrets she’d kept from him. She’d always been so squirrely about personal stuff, even when they were growing up.

“You’re going to be so hungover tomorrow,” Theo whispered.

He dropped the necklace on her nightstand with the other discarded jewelry she hadn’t gotten around to putting away: a dangly pair of earrings, a beaded bracelet, and—surprisingly—a mood ring. It was one of three matching rings that she, Aaron, and Theo got during a school trip. Felicity was the only one who could pull off wearing it in public, but Theo hadn’t seen her wear it in years. He’d assumed she’d lost it .

He touched it. The ring stayed default green. He imagined Kade telling him to put it on so they could see if it would react to his cold, dead skin. Kade could probably wear a mood ring, Theo considered as he stroked it. He could make it work.

A throat cleared behind him.

Theo whirled around to find Mrs. Beverly Sloan standing in the doorway in a pair of silk pajamas. She looked shockingly old, and Theo realized he hadn’t seen her without makeup in years. He hadn’t had a sleepover here since middle school.

“Another stunning end to a Sloan house party,” Beverly said, tucking her black hair behind her ears. She had none of her daughter’s fair features, but all of her sharpness: razor chin and blade cheekbones, her dark brown eyes just as sharp and keen as her daughter’s blue ones.

“I’ll take care of her,” she continued. “You can go.”

Theo stepped in front of the nightstand, all too conscious of the hunter necklace mixed in with the others. If she thought he’d seen it…

“I’m surprised you gave her the night off,” Theo said, keeping his voice casual as she strode up to the bed. “She says you’ve been pretty intense about practice.”

“Yes,” Beverly said, rearranging her daughter’s head gently on the pillow. “Well. It’s been…a strange week. I thought she deserved a break.”

Then she smiled, strained. She had a very perfunctory smile, one that let you know she’d stop doing it the second you looked away.

“Are you having a good night? Not stressful, I mean. Obviously it isn’t a good night. For you.”

Theo blinked. This was the most flustered he’d ever seen her. He waited for some hint of threat, a thinly veiled accusation like Aaron’s parents had been getting bolder with over the summer. She had to know . Right? The Fletchers knew, they’d tell her.

But Beverly just looked…awkward. Like she wanted to get her daughter a bucket and go to bed with the industrial-strength ear plugs she always wore when her daughter hosted a house party. Maybe she, like Cheech, wasn’t all in on the Let’s Put Theo Down Before He Brings About The Destruction Of The Town train.

“Right,” Beverly said as the silence stretched. “Of course. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Right,” Theo echoed, heart growing heavy even thinking of it.

He gave Felicity one last look. Then he left, ignoring the bitter betrayal swelling in his chest, ignoring his classmates’ averted eyes and barbed whispers, ignoring everything except the soft metallic scent of Kade growing ever closer.

Kade was still drinking when Theo got to the Lexus.

“Liss said not to take anything from the drinks table,” Theo reminded him as he pulled into the street .

“Not from the drinks table,” Kade replied, taking a swig. “It was from her room.”

“Great,” Theo muttered. “Much better.”

Kade shifted lower in the backseat. He was lying in the footwell this time. It would be pretty impossible to drink while he was hunched over like he usually was.

Kade asked, “How was Liss?”

“Fine,” Theo said curtly. “Her mom’s taking care of her.”

“Is she safe?”

Theo frowned. “What do you mean?”

Kade waved the bottle at him. “In general.”

“Sure. Why wouldn’t she be?”

“I don’t know. Her mom sounds like a bitch.” For a moment it sounded like Kade was going to say something else. Then he took another swig.

Theo cruised down the road, waiting for Kade to put the bottle back in his jacket. But Kade kept drinking: large, grimacing sips, mouth twisting in disgust after every pull.

By the time they pulled into Sundance’s driveway, half the contents of the plastic bottle had vanished down Kade’s throat. Theo didn’t know how significant that was—he’d stayed away from spirits even when he could drink them—but he knew it wasn’t good.

“Slow down,” Theo said as he followed Kade down the driveway. “What are you trying to do, make yourself puke? You’re going to bed soon, there’s no point anyway. ”

“I’ve had a very stressful night,” Kade replied.

They reached the front door, the automatic porch light flickering to life above their heads. Kade fumbled for his keys, then swore as he upended the bottle. Vodka spilled down his crop top, soaking into his tight skirt.

“Shit,” he whispered, pawing at his skirt one-handed. “Hold this.”

He handed the bottle over. Theo was so distracted by the suffocating stench of liquor he didn’t hear the footsteps until it was too late.

“Kade…”

The door opened. Sundance squinted out at them. Her arm was out of its sling but still wrapped in the cast, held gingerly against her rumpled sleep shirt.

Kade waved with his vodka-soaked hand. “Hiiii, Auntie.”

She sniffed him and wrinkled her nose. “You stink. What did you do, roll in it?”

“Pretty much.” Kade burped. “Excuse moi .”

Sundance stared at him, face firm. She had that look that adults sometimes got when they were deeply disappointed but didn’t want it to show. Even a hint of it made Theo’s stomach clench in panic.

Then she turned the look on him, and Theo had to fight a flinch.

Sundance’s eyes softened. “Sorry about this. Last thing you need right now.”

“It’s fine,” Theo said hastily, praying she wouldn’t say she was sorry about his dad. She hadn’t this morning, and he’d been so grateful for it.

“I didn’t get in a fight,” Kade declared.

“Great job,” Sundance said dryly.

She stepped aside. Kade lurched in, unsteady on his feet. Theo wondered how much he’d eaten today. He ate like a bird, even on good days. He watched Kade wander to the sink and turn on the faucet, then dip his head to drink directly from it.

Sundance sighed. “I’ll get him to bed. You go home, get some sleep.”

Theo ached with how much he wanted to go to sleep.

“I got him,” he said instead.

Sundance paused. She’d been about to close the door. “What?”

“I’ll do it,” Theo said. He took a step inside, pulling his shoulders in to make himself smaller. “You go back to bed. I’ll take care of him. It’s kind of my thing tonight.”

Kade pulled back from the faucet and stared, water dripping down his chin. His eyes were wide again, and so very dark.

Theo swallowed. Sundance was still eyeing him, like she was turning something over in her head. Did she think Theo would crawl into bed after Kade? Did she know he hadn’t slept on the couch last night, like he’d told her? She’d caught him creeping out of Kade’s room at three a.m. When he’d frozen guiltily, Sundance had just given him a nod and walked past him to the bathroom. Theo didn’t know what to say. I was watching your nephew as he slept, like a creep. I like listening to his heartbeat. I’m a great big vampire cliché, and now I’m going to go eat fluffy animals in the woods behind your house.

Sundance yawned. “Make sure he drinks enough water.”

“What does it look like I’m doing?” Kade said, a beat too late. The faucet was still running. He ducked down toward it, taking long, deep pulls.

While Kade got changed, Theo waited in the hall, digging his fingers into his palms and remembering the sharp points of Felicity’s hidden necklace.

So, the Sloans were hunters. Was Felicity in the dark, like Aaron? Or did she know even more than Theo did? He needed to confront her. Tomorrow, at the funeral.

Kade’s bedroom door swung open. His eyeliner was gone, as was his lipstick. He’d changed into boxers and his favorite wear-around-the-house shirt, which had a sentient lasagna eating Garfield. Theo had to stop himself from staring at Kade’s skinny legs. He saw them so rarely, especially now they’d taken up the habit of wearing clothes that hid the most amount of skin whenever they were around each other.

“I’m clean, dry and watered,” Kade said, leaning hard into the British side of his accent. “I even ate that bread you gave me. You can leave me to my own devices now.”

Theo stepped into his room, sniffing surreptitiously. The vodka was tucked behind his nightstand. The liquid had gone down since he last saw it. Kade had drunk even more while he was getting changed. What was the point? Did he need it to sleep? He didn’t need it last night. At least there were fresh crumbs on Kade’s shirt, so he wasn’t lying about the bread.

“Theo,” Kade said, back to his normal amount of British. “Seriously, man. I don’t need a babysitter, I’m not Liss levels of trashed. You can go.”

Theo thought about going back to that dark, silent house. He shook his head. “You said I needed to do something that wasn’t my vengeance quest, right? Here I am. Doing something else.”

He gestured toward the bed.

Kade’s heartbeat sped up. It took Theo an exhausted second to realize the implications of what he just said.

“Making sure you get to bed okay,” Theo said in a rush. “Obviously.”

Kade nodded. He was blushing again, bright red spots on his cheeks that Theo wanted to press his mouth against.

Theo waited for Kade to make some smart comment, or argue to stay up longer. But he just walked straight to bed and climbed in, no theatrics required .

“You look like shit,” he told Theo as he settled under the sheets.

“I’m fine,” Theo said quietly.

Kade sighed. “Bone’s a lot harder to heal than skin, huh?”

Theo didn’t reply. Kade scooted to the side, patting the empty space he’d left on the mattress.

“Come on,” he said. “Feeding time. We’re coming up to it anyway.”

He sat up and shuffled his sleep shirt down his shoulder, exposing his pale neck.

Theo swayed toward him automatically, catching himself before he could sit down on the bed.

“You’re drunk.”

“Yeah, it’s really hitting.” Kade tapped the base of his neck, right next to the mole that Theo often pressed his tongue into while he bit. “Think you’ll get a buzz?”

Theo glared at him halfheartedly. He was so, so tired. And he couldn’t sleep. Not ever again. He could get energy, sure. He could drink Kade and be up again, keep moving forward. But Theo didn’t want to move forward right now. He wanted to lie down and hit pause. Be dead to the world for eight hours, no cares, no worries, no deadlines counting down to his inevitable doom. Just…go away for a while.

Biting Kade was the closest thing he had to that now.

“Come on. I’ll drink so much water.” Kade’s voice softened. “Seriously. You have to be okay for the funeral. It’ll suck way more if you’re already feeling like shit. Trust me.”

Theo thought about asking Kade what his mum’s funeral was like. But Kade was wasted, and he didn’t want him to say anything he would regret the next day.

Theo hesitated. “You should come.”

Kade blinked. Theo watched his brain catch up.

“You sure?”

“I want you there,” Theo admitted.

Kade put his thumbnail in his mouth, gnawing worriedly. The nail beds were red and raw, and Theo tensed, waiting for blood.

It didn’t come. Kade dropped his hand into his lap.

“Okay,” he said, very quietly.

Theo nodded, surprised by the intensity of relief that rushed through him.

Kade yawned, reaching up to scratch his forehead. He missed, palm skating over his forehead before fumbling back down to his eyebrow.

Theo snorted. “Are you even going to remember this conversation tomorrow?”

“I’ll set an alarm,” Kade said. He grabbed his phone off the nightstand and started typing. He turned it toward Theo, showing him an alarm set for 8.30 a.m.: PUT THE FUN IN FUNERAL.

Kade put the phone down. “Bite me, blood boy.”

I like it better when you call me sunshine , Theo thought.

Then he leaned in and sunk his teeth into Kade’s neck.

Blood flooded his mouth. It tasted different than usual. But the sour, metallic note from the vodka wasn’t nearly enough to drown out the addictive taste Theo had grown to crave so badly.

He sucked hard, pulling Kade closer by his Garfield shirt. Sometimes he wrapped an arm around Kade’s back, but he couldn’t do that with both of Kade’s arms exposed. Too risky.

Kade relaxed against him with a happy sigh. Theo heard it like it was coming from the other end of a long tunnel. It was hard to hear anything over the pleased thump of Kade’s heartbeat, the blood rushing from Kade’s veins into his waiting mouth.

He pressed his tongue to the mole on Kade’s neck. It blistered under his touch.

Theo pulled back, smoothing his thumb over the burns and the puncture wounds until they sunk back into Kade’s skin. Then he lowered Kade back against the bedframe by his shirt.

Kade smiled up at him as the endorphin high faded. “Are you buzzed?”

Theo shook his head. He wasn’t any more buzzed than he usually was after biting Kade, and the sour taste of secondhand vodka was already gone.

“Tragic,” Kade muttered. His eyelids fluttered.

Theo stood.

Kade caught his sleeve.

“I’m just going to get you some water,” Theo said. “Then I’ll go. ”

Kade didn’t respond. His fingers were tight in Theo’s sleeve, rubbing the material with a strange expression. Theo couldn’t tell if he was mentally cataloging it for one of his projects or something else entirely.

“After my mum died,” Kade said, “I dove into whatever distraction I could find. You know? Video games, crafts, music, books. Then drinking. Fighting. You run as fast as you can, but the pain always catches up. Better to have someone with you when it does.”

He dropped Theo’s sleeve. He suddenly looked very small in the blankets, eyes on his own lap as he talked.

“Look,” Kade continued, worrying at his hands. “I’m not a good example of moving past shit. But I’m a great example of what not to do. I’m the ghost of Christmas future. Don’t ignore your feelings, Theo! Or you’ll end up sad and alone !”

Theo thought back to Kade in middle school, sitting alone in the cafeteria. About Kade last week, still alone in the cafeteria. That shirt he’d uncovered in Kade’s drawers, that wonky red stitching spelling out I AM SO FUCKING LONELY . Sundance admitting they didn’t have a lot of visitors, making sure not to look at Kade as she said it.

Theo asked, “Are you sad?”

“Not as much as I used to be,” Kade said, sounding surprised. But there was still that terrible vulnerability in his eyes, like he hated himself for admitting any of this. Like he was waiting for Theo to sneer at him .

“You’re not alone,” Theo tried. “Like you said. I’m…I’m with you. I know I’ve been…I’m kind of a dick right now?—”

Kade laughed loud enough to startle them both.

“You’re fine ,” Kade said. “Jesus, mate. It hasn’t even been a week . You’re smack dab in the deep. Can’t even see the surface where you are.”

Theo was struck with an image of himself in an ocean so dark he couldn’t even see where it ended. The idea made him so tired he wanted to cry, again, which made him angry, again. Mostly at himself.

“See you at the funeral,” he said, and stood.

Kade was asleep when he came back with a glass of water. Theo set it on his nightstand, plugged his phone into the charger. Then he rolled Kade gently over onto his stomach, in case of sleep vomit.

He stood there for a minute longer, watching Kade breathe. He didn’t know why his parents always made it sound like such a chore, taking care of Theo when he was a kid. Always rolling their eyes when he wanted to be tucked in or telling him to make his own soup when he got sick. Even when Theo was angry and tired and wanted to cry, it was nice to take care of someone.

Kade shifted in his sleep. The sheet fell down his shoulders.

Theo pulled it back up. Careful, as always, not to touch Kade’s skin.