Page 40 of Veil of Vasara (Fate of the Five #1)

CHAPTER 40 – LORIA

T he numbers on the boards before us were in my favour. For now. The ones containing the total score to the games.

The games were the third event of the Courting Season. The winner was often greatly favoured by the nobles, to which it gave an excuse to gamble and place bets, to line their pockets with further gold.

Horse riding, colf, batting, archery, and bowling. We had already played the first three, and as of now, myself, and both the Zeiman and Kalnasan candidates – Rhana and Dyna, were all close in scores. Jurasa’s candidate, Maiwen, had fallen behind drastically, her eyes glazed over more than usual.

Archery was next. I’d been taught to throw daggers and shoot weapons since the age of five. My training had come to a sudden halt once I’d reached adolescence, but I’d still kept up my skills in private, somewhat.

“Confident about your chances?” Zeima’s Princess asked me.

“Not so much,” I replied.

Rhana laughed under her breath. Since our recent dinner, she had been acting very differently. Although, I thought, it was likely this was a better reflection of her true self. Not that there was anything wrong with that, only that it was an infinitely more treacherous version.

We were in an open field, wide and relatively plain. Short swathes of golden grass lay beneath us, dancing in the wind that weaved through it, carrying the smell of the city, full of meat, spices, and flowers. The thin transparent blouse that hung around my shoulders was similar to those hanging around the other candidate's, only that mine was purple, Rhana’s was silver, Dyna’s was blue, Tarren’s was red, and Maiwen’s was green. We each wore a dress of similar material underneath it. The fabric was itchy and scratched at my skin with every rustle. It almost made the thick cloak I had worn on arriving here seem comfortable. The only one unbothered by both our attire, and the event, was Princess Maiwen.

Rhana noticed me staring at her. “Her escort has been missing since this morning.”

“That’s…unusual.” I unconsciously turned behind me to look at Nathon, who like all the escorts, remained a few steps behind us. He wasn’t even paying attention, his brows furrowed in thoughts known only to himself. I did, however, catch eyes with the King, who was sitting behind us, under a canopy, shielding him from the heat. He smiled slightly as I noticed him watching.

I stood there, blinking, unsure of what to do. It would be presumptuous to return the gesture but cold to ignore him. As if sensing my internal dilemma, the King smiled even more, completely ignoring the man who was trying to speak to him on his right.

“Your Highness? Your Highness?” one of the attendants had come up to me.

“It’s your round, Your Highness.” He bowed as he told me.

“Ah. Thank you.”

Nathon fell in step beside me as we walked towards the platform. Dyna had just shot. She looked thoroughly displeased with herself, lamenting to the Captain about her attempt.

As we moved, Nathon whispered in my ear, “You’d better win. I put a bet on you.”

I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes in public.

“No, you didn’t,” I murmured.

He drew back quickly. “How do you know?”

“You’d never do anything that frivolous.”

“Mmmm.” He smiled to himself.

Now that we were at the platform, we were much closer to the King than before. His men were whispering amongst themselves looking at Dyna and I. Dyna was still hovering nearby.

The King and I locked eyes again, only this time, he wasn’t smiling. He only tilted his head downwards slightly, in encouragement.

I turned around and drew my bow. We had three shots. Three. I could see from the board with its colour coded arrows that Dyna had landed two strong shots, but one poor one, Maiwen had unexpectedly hit near the centre each time, one average, and two strong shots. Tarren had failed miserably, two average, and one weak shot.

I took in a deep breath and focused, trying to pay attention to the direction of the wind. The string dug deeper and deeper into my flesh. I could feel people’s attention on me, hear their voices, their quips.

My hand trembled slightly. It had been a long time since I’d practiced, and I was used to firing arrows in completely different weather conditions.

I fired.

“Ooohh,” the crowd let out, painfully.

The shot had made Tarren’s seem impeccable.

I let the bow down and closed my eyes. I drew a breath in and out. I could hear people laughing. Such a ridiculous way to be entertained.

My shot had barely made it to the edge of the board. I waited for Nathon to speak, to make some mumbled crude remark, but there was nothing, only the incessant chortling of those under the canopy. That and the thundering of my heart, thrashing against my ribs like a quake in the earth. I imagined my father’s face, his eyes slit with disapproval. I imagined my mother’s lips, stretching into a thin line of disgust. It was as if they were there, in the crowd, phantom observers to my failure. They were always there somehow, at the back of my mind, casting judgement upon all I did. I could never escape their shadow. Even when I had roamed through Audra’s mountains, when I had stepped away from the Citadel for days at a time, they haunted me. That feeling, of inadequacy, of smothering futility had hunted me. And it had always struck true.

As the laughter bounced around me, the knowledge of it sunk inside my chest. That distance could not destroy it. That not every haunting could be outrun. That not every prison had a lock and key, barring out the pain. Some had doors wide open, letting in a gentle breeze, for there would always be a jailor waiting at the end of a paved street, and a million different ways their chains would stay on your wrists. No matter where you went. No matter what you did.

Was I doomed to live with this suffocating feeling till death? Was I fated to never feel anything but insufficient?

The laughing stopped as the King stood, holding his token. Each noble had a token, that was a sign of their bet, if they decided to place one. Just in front of the canopy was a large series of boxes, each one colour coordinated to the candidates, and inside them were the tokens, inscribed in ink with the bet that the noble wished to place on that individual.

The King grabbed his token and glided over to the boxes. He took the quill from the servant who was supervising it, wrote an unknown figure on his token’s surface, and dropped it.

Into the purple container.

The people in the canopy gasped, some of them huffed, or whispered under their breaths.

I was stunned. I gripped my bow harder, trying to bring myself back to a sense of calm, but utterly failed. The King’s gesture was a gesture of goodwill, I guessed, but if anything, it had only made me far more restless.

Nathon whose arms were crossed, raised his brows, and glanced at me from the side. The King spun around, his loose red blouse beating against his skin in the gentle breeze. He returned to his seat, looking at me directly as he sat down.

In the peak of the daylight’s sun, his eyes looked even brighter, and paler than usual, as did his skin. He appeared like a glass sculpture of ice the sun could melt at any moment.

Nobody was saying anything. Tarren, who was still nearby the platform after her attempt, looked furious. Dyna’s mouth was wide open. Lord Elias who was seated near Eliel was chuckling to himself, shaking his head. Everyone was simply waiting for me to fire my next arrow.

In a sudden motion and wave of seething rage, I turned around, drew my bow, and without giving myself time to think, or feel, fired again.

It struck the centre of the golden sun, painted deep inside the board.

The corner of my lips twitched up. Those who had been laughing before were now silent. Some of them approached the betting boxes, I could tell from the shuffling of feet behind me, but I didn’t turn around.

I didn’t give myself time to doubt, or dwell upon the stakes, or the meaning behind these shots, the consequences, the fate that awaited Nathon and I if I we failed here, and failed again.

I shot once more.

“Impossible!” Tarren moaned. Dyna let out a little shriek.

The sound of faint applause rang from behind me, as had been customary after each candidate shot their three arrows.

I turned to face them and curtsied.

“Looks like you’ll be even richer than you were this morning,” Elias said to the King, pointing at where my third arrow had landed, just a whisker away from the second.

The King said nothing, only slid his index finger further up the side of his jaw, leaning further into his hand.

A few more nobles stood and placed their bets on me. I couldn’t help but watch them hobble over in a rush, and smile at them as they made their way back to their seats.

It wasn’t that proving them wrong made me feel anything in particular or gave me any sense of satisfaction. It was making them feel uncomfortable that was at least slightly enjoyable.

Still, my act of confidence and pride was impeded by the steady and persistent shaking of my hands, which had not yet faded.

I moved towards the candidates who had already shot. Nathon followed like a dark cloud. Even though Vasara had provided him with alternative clothing, he only ever wore the dark clothes we were used to in Audra.

Dyna approached me as I came closer. “That was magnificent! How did you do that? Can you teach me sometime! I tried my best to hit the centre, but I just couldn’t do it. Wait, is it my bow hold? Let me show you.” She lifted her bow up, about to draw the string back.

“My Lady, I’m sure that the Princess wishes to rest.” The Captain approached from behind her. He gently placed his hand over her bow to lower it before an arrow could inadvertently be fired from its string.

“No, it’s quite alright.” I smiled, “But truthfully, I haven’t used a bow and arrow for some time, I’m sure that it was simply good fortune, or the will of the Gods. I wouldn’t be able to advise you.” I looked down at her, despite my short height, Dyna was still shorter.

“You’re being too modest! We all saw you, didn’t we?” She turned to the Captain.

“It was an excellent performance, Your Highness,” he agreed.

“Thank you, Captain.”

“You must have done it somehow! Did you imagine something? I’ve heard that some people envisage a place, or pay attention to certain sounds?” Dyna’s eagerness to learn was touching.

“Yes, I imagined that I was firing at him,” I quipped, smiling as I pointed behind me towards Nathon.

“You? What?” Dyna seemed genuinely perplexed. “What does she mean? How would that help? He’s your brother, isn’t he?”

“Exactly.” I nodded my head, my lips curling up, “That’s exactly why it works.”

“I don’t understand. Do you understand?” she asked the Captain.

The Captain who was looking at Nathon now, said curtly, “I understand.”

Nathon’s eyebrows sank slightly. He smirked a little.

I cast my gaze between them both and made sure Nathon noticed my quizzical look.

Why is he looking at you like that? What did you do?

Behind us, Rhana was making her way to the platform, and had already begun to lift her bow, to fire her first arrow. The crowd waited silently. Rhana’s arrow struck true, similar to Dyna’s first two. An auspicious start.

“She’s good too,” a voice from behind us spoke. Vasara’s candidate approached with her escort.

“Not as good as you"— she looked at me — “or her.” She cast a glance at Maiwen.

Dyna began trying to console her, “Archery is hard, you shouldn’t be upset that—"

“I’m not upset. I was a slight bit frustrated at myself, but I knew that these games and athletics were never going to play to my strengths.”

“Oh. What are your strengths?” Dyna asked curiously. It was difficult to watch her entertain Tarren with conversation. The rest of us were clearly wary of her, waiting for the bite to her honeyed words.

“Things which are more…refined?”

Nathon tilted his head to the side. “You don’t think the art of being able to handle a weapon is refined, My Lady?”

“Not at all, it is a brutal and vicious thing, Your Highness.”

Nathon pointed at the Captain, who looked slightly taken aback by the attention being brought to himself. “I was in Kalnasa once, a long time ago. I was about your age then.” He looked at Dyna. “But while I was there, I snuck away. I’d heard about the training their soldiers undertake, the way in which they are taught to move, to fight, to wield their weapons as if they were a very extension of themselves. They train their soldiers from adolescence into adulthood, to prepare them to join one of their five regiments. The Army, the Cavalry, the King’s guard, the Law Invokers, and the Hunt, but they’re all trained in a similar manner.”

Rhana fired her second arrow, another good shot.

Nathon continued. “I found their training grounds. Of course, nobody is supposed to find them undetected but…” Nathon shrugged, nonchalant about the fact he was openly admitting to infiltrating a highly secure location. I watched him startled, I had never heard this story before, this fabrication. He was always inventing new ones to adapt to whatever situation he was in. This was hardly a surprise. But there was a glint, a glean in his eye that made me think that perhaps this time, it was true.

He smiled to himself before he finished the sentence. “I sat there and watched. For hours. I went back there a few times to watch while I was there. Because you see” — he looked at Tarren — “it was the most beautiful thing I had ever witnessed. It was like…they were dancing. I’ve even tried to practice or teach myself such things since then, but I can never quite find the fluidity of motion. The art of it. The…refinement.” He grinned. Then he looked at the Captain, who was listening to him, a look of slight surprise on his face.

“I didn’t see you there though, Captain. I supposed you’d finished your training by then.”

The Captain furrowed his brows before he spoke. “What year was it, Your Highness?”

“1112,” Nathon replied. Eight years ago.

“Then yes, I was finished, Your Highness,” the Captain was regarding Nathon curiously.

“But what was so beautiful about it? I’ve always found such things rather tedious, if you’ll pardon me, Your Highness,” Tarren asked.

Nathon drew his gaze away from the Captain and back to her.

“You’d have to witness it to know.” Nathon seemed like a completely different person at this moment in time. His face seemed to glow. I could tell that the others had noticed it as well.

Then suddenly, as if someone had shaken him from his dreamlike state, he pointed at Hestan and said, “Perhaps the Captain can give you a private show.”

The Captain looked unperturbed.

Tarren stuttered. “I... that won’t be necessary.”

“Or the Captain can teach you, Prince?” Dyna said to Nathon.

The Captain and Nathon stared at each other for a few seconds before Nathon said, “No need. Although… I would like to see how the Captain moves one day myself.”

“He’s the best soldier Kalnasa has!” Dyna said enthusiastically.

“I do not doubt it.” Nathon smiled at the Captain.

“He was taught by the very best himself…he…” Dyna’s voice grew timid suddenly, as if she regretted her words.

“Really? By whom?” Tarren asked.

Hestan smiled sadly and looked up at her. “He was a great man, My Lady.”

“Was?” Tarren asked, sounding shocked, but mostly, greatly excited, as if the story of this man’s passing was a piece of treasured gossip.

“He was killed, My Lady,” Hestan confirmed, his voice detached.

“Killed? When? Why?” Tarren asked.

Hestan seemed uncomfortable answering the question. “Before he was our mentor, he was a soldier, a warrior, a politician of sorts. He had no shortage of enemies, My Lady.”

“That’s dreadful." The insincerity of her tone was obvious.

A strange silence hung over the air, even Nathon, who was normally able to fill any, seemed disconcerted, looking down at his feet.

“You’re very fortunate to have the Captain by your side with his skills, My Lady,” I said to Dyna.

“Yes, that’s true.” She smiled brightly.

“But aren’t you worried?” Tarren said.

Dyna looked confused. “About what?”

“About the riots in Kalnasa. Isn’t the Captain better suited to dealing with the situation there?”

The riots? What riots? I glanced at Nathon’s facial expression. He already knew, I could tell, but the Captain and Dyna seemed equally unsurprised.

They all knew.

Tarren’s bait had not been taken, but there was still time for the hook to wander in the water.

Let her think we were flapping around, hungry for her lies. It would be better if she believed that.

“What riots?” I asked, feigning interest.

“Oh, they say it’s awful, that the people are hungry, and the King is being brutally attacked for it. Who knows if any harm will come to the Royals there? It’s terrible…just terrible.” She placed a hand over her mouth.

She was trying to make Dyna angry, I realised. If Dyna acted aggressively in public, it would greatly discredit her image in front of all of these prominent people, improving Tarren’s chances.

“I am sure Kalnasa are dealing with the situation as best they can,” I said as confidently as possible.

“But who knows if it will be enough? What if the worst should happen and the King himself is injured?”

“My uncle is a capable and strong man. He will be safe,” Dyna said quietly, as if she didn’t believe it herself.

“Captain, you must be greatly worried. They say you’ve been by his side for years, his greatest confidant. It must pain you so that you cannot be by his side now. I hope you are able to return to his aid soon.”

The Captain straightened up and tried his best to remain impartial, but the tension that hung over his brows betrayed his annoyance and anxiety.

Tarren noticed, and blinked softly, smiling equally so, clearly satisfied with herself.

Rhana fired her third shot, three solidly good shots.

“Ahh, looks like you won, Princess,” Tarren said to me.

And you as well .

Hestan and Dyna’s pained expressions were evidence of that.

Nathon noticed them too.

“And you…lost, most egregiously,” Nathon said to her, pointing at Tarren’s shots on the board.

“All is still to play for, Your Highness. Life is so unpredictable. Don’t you think so?” she said to the Captain. “After all, who could have anticipated such a turn of events in your Kingdom?”

“The food shortage has troubled our people for some time, My Lady,” Hestan said flatly.

“But you look quite well, Captain?” Tarren probed him. “It cannot be that bad surely.”

“That’s not true!” Dyna wailed.

Some of the nobles at the table turned to look at her.

The Captain tried to calm her down. “My Lady, it’s—"

“No.” Dyna lowered her voice but remained angry. “She’s saying that you—"

“You’re right, I am quite well, My Lady,” Hestan said to Tarren, cutting Dyna off.

“Why are you letting her—" Dyna started again.

“Let people think what they will,” I said to Dyna. “It doesn’t make it true." I was trying my best to calm her. Tarren scowled at me. The thought that she hoped her look of disapproval would affect me in some way was almost amusing.

“It is not only me, Captain,” Tarren continued. “There are many who wonder about this ‘food shortage’ you speak of, and they cannot help but question why, if it is so severe, and these riots are truly something to be concerned of, you do not rush to your King’s side, and how you yourself look so well fed. Surely you can understand their misgivings?”

Hestan seemed torn between defending himself and remaining silent, pressing his lips together slightly.

“I have an idea,” Nathon said, stepping closer to Tarren. “If you are so concerned about it, why don’t you go and pay them a visit? That way you can verify the truth and relieve all these poor people of their… misgivings .”

Hestan and Dyna looked at Nathon with confusion. Nathon’s words confused me less, however. He was probably trying to make sure that everyone but us walked away from this conversation appearing weaker.

“Of course, I can do no such thing, Your Highness, but that does not mean these questions are without merit, don’t you agree?”

“No. I don’t agree,” Nathon replied assuredly. “You could in theory, go to Kalnasa, so could any of these people you mention that create such theories about the state of the situation there, but they do not. So, their concern, and your concern does not strike me as true.”

“I forget, Your Highness, that you are so well travelled, so used to visiting different places. Alas, most of us cannot abandon our responsibilities and lives, to verify such information.”

Tarren was very well spoken, and much more intelligent than she had previously seemed.

“So, if you cannot verify it, then surely, you cannot definitely refute it either, isn’t that correct?” Nathon put to her.

“I suppose but—"

“But you enjoy the version which casts another Kingdom in the worst light.”

“It is not that—"

“It is understandable,” Nathon said.

Now I was completely confused as to his motives.

He continued, “If your rival looks poorer, then you look greater, isn’t that true?”

“Your Highness, I can assure you this has nothing to do with—"

“Are you saying then, that you believe the words of these random individuals, over the words of the Captain and the Lady here?” Nathon added, an obviously feigned pain to his voice.

“I…of course not…I—"

“Excellent. So we can all agree the Captain is a semi-starved man riddled by the guilt of being torn between conflicting loyalties, and the Lady a dutiful young woman, who at this time, is doing what she believes is best for her people?” He smiled at Hestan. Hestan looked at him warily, the only sign of his bewilderment the fluttering of his silver eyelashes.

As intelligent as Tarren might have been, she couldn’t outwit Nathon when it came to poisonous charms. He had orchestrated this whole conversation to arrive at this conclusion, as if he anticipated every answer she would give correctly.

This, this was like watching dancing.

“Indeed, Your Highness,” Tarren reluctantly agreed.

“Ahh, excuse me,” Nathon looked at the betting station and strolled towards it. Rhana, Tarren, and Dyna all made way to return their bows and arrows. Hestan was a few steps behind Dyna, having stood still for a few seconds, with his eyes closed.

Before he could walk past me, I spoke. “What do you want from him?” I said it quietly, my voice blended in with the chatter surrounding us.

The Captain came to an abrupt stop and looked at me sharply.

Nathon wouldn’t inform me, and so trying to pry the information out of the tight-lipped Captain, while difficult, seemed the only alternative.

“Your…Highness?” He sounded hesitant.

“I know you want something from my brother.” I fiddled with my bow, looking down, avoiding eye contact with him. “What is it?”

I could feel the Captain’s gaze on me, his face still tilted at an awkward angle. He seemed unsure as to whether he should confirm or deny the implication my question had made.

“There’s no need to deny it. I already know you have some kind of…preestablished arrangement. I just want to be sure it’s nothing that will—”

“I have no intention of harming your brother, Your Highness,” he said suddenly, taking one step backwards, to look at my face more clearly.

“Of course not.” Who would even make such an attempt? “But…if your arrangement will endanger him in some way, please… withdraw from it.”

Hestan was silent for a few seconds. “Your brother is safe, Your Highness. In any case, it is hard for me to imagine he would agree to something he believed too dangerous, or a risk.”

I thought about the threats my father had made against us before coming here. How could a sentence be both so true and utterly false at once?

“It may be hard to imagine but…my brother is not…” I was trying to choose my words carefully. This dance of words was just as complicated, if not more so than the Kalnasan training. I sighed.

“A simple person to make dealings with,” I finished my sentence.

“Are you…warning me, Your Highness?”

“It is not a warning.” I chuckled slightly, trying to prove those words. “I just wonder if what you ask of him will be worth the cost…and if you will be willing to pay it.”

Hestan furrowed his eyebrows. “I will, Your Highness.”

I sighed. It stuttered as it left my lips.

“I will,” he repeated again, glancing at my face caringly.

I looked up and turned to walk with him. “It’s rather late for that I’m afraid, and it’s hard for me not to be troubled when you…look at each other so…glaringly. As if you despise each other.”

“I do not despise him, Your Highness,” Hestan said coolly.

“I hope that is true,” I said.

I returned my bow to the attendant. Nathon approached, waving a pouch back and forth in front of my face. He looked puzzled for a moment when he saw the Captain standing next to me.

“You’re escorting the wrong one, Captain.”

“I was only congratulating her on her victory, Your Highness.”

“What about me?” Nathon pointed to the pouch he had brought over. “I won lots of lovely gold thanks to my intuition.”

He had actually placed a bet on me. I stared at him, raising my eyebrows.

Nathon let out a light laugh. “I told you I’d bet on you, didn’t I?”

“Congratulations, Your Highness.” Hestan bowed and made to move away, but Nathon stopped him. He lightly lifted up the Captain’s hand with the palm of his own and placed the pouch into his grip.

Hestan looked down at the pouch confused.

“Your Highness… what are—"

“Take it…after all, you’re light on your belongings, aren’t you?”

Is he?

Nathon’s hand was still lightly touching the Captain's knuckles. His eyes searched the Captain’s face from side to side. The Captain tipped his palm over, placing the pouch back into Nathon’s hand.

“Your Highness, I cannot accept this.”

Nathon repeated the action, returning the pouch to Hestan’s hand. “Stop being so humble, Captain. I do not expect anything in return.”

Hestan quickly glanced at me.

“Neither does she,” Nathon said.

But Hestan’s pride would not allow him to take it. “I am—"

“What’s that?” Dyna asked, approaching us after having returned her bow.

“I’m trying to give your Captain a gift so that he can treat you to a meal, or whatever it is young ladies want. But he refuses… isn’t that frustrating?” Nathon crossed his arms.

“Captain?” Dyna said, gripping Hestan’s forearm slightly. “Please…I desperately want that… urrr dress. You remember the one! In the shop window from Roart Street?”

She didn’t need the dress. She needed the money, just as the Captain did, but she was giving him an out, a reason to accept it that would not wound his pride. Dyna was too young to avoid making such things obvious.

Hestan grasped the pouch tensely. He appeared as if it took every fibre of his will not to throw it fifty feet away from him. “Thank you, Your Highness.”

Nathon smiled widely. “It’s a pleasure as always, Captain.”

Dyna grabbed Hestan’s arm and pulled him along. He glanced back at us once last time before they left.

I decided to try this again.

“What does the Captain want from you?” I whispered.

“My soul,” Nathon replied teasingly.

I rolled my eyes this time, unable to stop myself. “Who would want that?”

“You’re right. It would be a terrible reward.”

We started making our way to the next station. The spaces between us, and the other candidates, and nobles widened, leaving us more room to speak.

“You did well. Even the King set his sights on you.” Nathon nudged me with his elbow.

“You’re avoiding my question.”

“I’ve already answered it before.”

“Then why do you look at each other with such…malice?” I thought to see Nathon’s reaction to the same question.

He chuckled. “Do we? I hold no malice towards the Captain, perhaps he does towards me but...” He trailed off.

“Then why did you speak up for him?”

“Isn’t it obvious? Letting Dyna be disgraced does nothing for us. She is a child, and the King will not select a child to be his wife, not this one. She is not a threat to us, but Tarren might be, so, exposing her schemes is more beneficial.”

“Does she scheme?” I squinted ahead. “Or is she one of those, who likes to make others feel small, so that they can feel larger?”

Nathon threw me a sidelong glance, smiling slowly. “Both. Perhaps.”

He seemed more talkative than usual today.

“Why give him the money?” I side eyed him cautiously.

Nathon was silent for a few seconds. “There’s a message inside.”

Ah.

“Any news?”

“I’ll find out tonight. Just win this round for now.”

“So that you can give the Captain more messages?”

“Tsk. Your obsession with the Captain is frightening.”

“It is not me who is obsessed,” I retorted.

“No, you’re right, it is the King… with you.”

“He is not obsessed with me.”

“He likes you. That’s good for us.”

“Who knows what he thinks? You know that better than anyone. Perhaps he feels a need to repay a debt to Audra after you saved his life.”

“He doesn’t strike me as the debt paying kind.”

“What does he strike you as?”

At that moment, I remembered Nathon’s words before we left Audra.

Does that matter? I’m not your escort so that we can take midnight strolls and gossip about the colour of the King’s eyes. I’m coming to make sure that nobody tries to hurt you or kill you. I’m coming to make sure that we see this task through, and that we survive it.

And I couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“What’s so amusing?”

“I…nothing.”

Nathon squinted at me in disbelief before he said, “He strikes me as a debtor.”

“What does that make you?”

“A debt collector.”

“And me?”

Nathon said nothing.

“And the Captain?” I couldn’t help but smile as I asked.

Nathon closed his eyes and smiled, shaking his head. “Stop meddling.”

“Isn’t that what you do constantly?”

“Yes, but I’m good at it.”

It felt strange. We were speaking so easily, almost, so calmly, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

A despair came over me as I realised how temporary this was, how meaningless in truth.

“What…do you think will happen?” My voice had dropped.

“I don’t know, Loria.”

I looked in front of us to find Dyna and the Captain whispering to one another.

Dyna stopped and ran towards us suddenly. Holding one of the coins from the pouch in her hand.

“This is for you!” She cleared her throat of her excitement. “Your Highness.”

Nathon glanced at the lunar coin confused, then at me, then Dyna. “Whatever for?”

“Please take it! You defended us, you defended our honour and we…we owe you something!”

Hestan stood a good few steps away, looking utterly embarrassed.

“Ignore him! He’s obstinate, but he is thankful too, he said so himself!”

“Did he?” Nathon sounded amused. “YOU’RE WELCOME, CAPTAIN!” He shouted, then pocketed the coin in his upper vest.

Hestan let out an exasperated sigh.

“He…He really hasn’t.” Dyna stopped herself suddenly.

“Hasn’t…what?” Nathon asked.

She appeared ashamed and looked down. “He really hasn’t eaten the same…since…for months now. He let his men have some of his rations. He told me he didn’t, but I heard from them he did, and…he’s lost weight I know, everyone knows. Well, he was always urrrrm slender, but now, he’s even more so, and…when we go out, he won’t spend the gold on himself, he only spends it on food for me, and he refuses to spend more than necessary, and… he’s hungry I think, but of course, he won’t admit it, because there are people starving back home, and here as well…and he would never claim to suffer while they suffer, and—"

Hestan, who had caught wind of Dyna’s rambling, strode towards us briskly.

I waited for Nathon to tease him, but he only stood there quietly, saying nothing, looking at the Captain expressionlessly.

“My Lady, we are falling behind.”

“Of course, sorry. I lost track of time and…gave the Prince the gold.”

“It was His Highnesses’ in the first place.” He glanced at us cautiously, clearly wondering what Dyna had just told us.

“Let us go, My Lady.” Hestan gently led Dyna away.

Once they were a fair distance away from us, I said, “He must hide it under his clothing, his armour. He doesn’t appear slender.”

“You’d like to get a closer look, would you?” Nathon said, grinning.

“Wouldn’t you have a better idea of his physique? Since you ‘watched their soldiers training’… of course,” I replied mockingly.

“I did… you know.”

“That…that was true?” My eyes widened.

“Most of it.”

“Most of it?”

“There were some omittances. Like what happened when I was discovered.” Nathon’s voice was now subdued.

No words were needed between us for that, whatever it was that happened when our father, or someone in a similar position, had discovered that a young Nathon had been sneaking off to fulfil his own curiosity, rather than his duties, can’t have been a story fit for public ears.

“Was it worth it?”

Nathon smiled softly, glancing at the grass, “Yes.”

“Would you do it again? For the same result?”

“Yes.”

“It must truly have been a sight then,” I said incredulously.

“It was. If I am ever offered the chance to see it again for a price then…”

“Then what?”

“Then I’ll pay it. I will.”

I will.