Page 54

I set my glass down and pushed it away. “Thank you.” I looked at my friend. “For everything. For the explanations.” My voice dropped to a whisper as I refused to hold her gaze. “But I think it is time for me to go. There’s no place for me here.”

“Briar.” His voice was deep, soft, and tinged with sadness.

My breath caught at the sound of my name, and tears stung my eyes.

Before I could look up, he was in front of me, kneeling, trying to find my eyes. How did he do that?

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’ve been pushing you away since the moment I met you.”

I raised my gaze to his, focusing on his eyes that revealed a pain I’d never seen before.

“Maybe we ought to go,” Isla murmured.

Lorcan shook his head without breaking eye contact with me. “No. You two stay here. Briar, would you come with me? Just for a few minutes.”

I shook my head. “You made yourself abundantly clear.”

He nodded, his expression grim. “I know. And I was wrong. Please—if you don’t want to forgive me, if you want me to leave you alone forever, I promise I will. Just give me the next few minutes.”

A spark of hope I refused to acknowledge took hold as my resolve wavered, the raw plea in his voice carving through my defenses. “Fine,” I said with a sigh, standing. “Where are we going?”

He stood. “I want to show you where I grew up.”

“I thought you grew up here,” I said, gesturing around the room.

He shook his head. “This isn’t where I grew up at all. This was built in the 1600s. I was born on the spring equinox in 1122.”

The year felt impossible, too ancient to be tied to the man standing in front of me. But the spring equinox? I fought a smile, my heart warming at the connection. “That means our birthdays are exactly six months apart on the calendar.”

He tilted his head. “You were born on the spring equinox?”

“Yes, in the Southern Hemisphere.”

“Please?” He held out his hand in invitation.

I kept my arms bound to my sides, but stood next to him. “Let’s go.”

His expression fell along with his hand, realization dawning that I would not take it. He bit his lip, his voice strained. “This way.”

He turned, leading me through the pantry and out the other side into a dining room. We crossed the room, then passed through a leaded glass door into the formal gardens.

Ivy and roses crept along the stone paths, their sweet, rich scent still heavy in the air, like they were trying to mask something awful beneath it. To the left, the wall I’d seen from the beach stretched into the distance. From here, it was low enough that I could see the harbor on the other side.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Just over here.” He pointed at the ash and hawthorn trees at the end of the path. Leading me into the shaded grove, he stopped in front of a weathered cottage door. The hinges creaked as he pushed it open, holding it, waiting for me to pass him.

Inside, shadows danced on the stones from slivers of light that came through the tiny windows dotting each of the walls.

In the back corner, a large fireplace remained cold.

The earthy smell of the dirt floor engulfed me as I took in the sparse furnishings.

Only a table with two benches sat off to the left, and a few chairs and crates to the right.

Shelves and pegs on the walls held pans, dishes, and farming implements.

I jumped as Lorcan’s hand grazed the small of my back.

“This is where I grew up,” he breathed. “This is where I spent my childhood. The manor was fields back then—my brothers and I ran through them, playing games like other children. We slept in front of that fireplace on a wolf skin rug, huddled together for warmth. We were inseparable then.” He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth.

“Even Aiden?”

He nodded. “It was long before he became what he is now.”

I tilted my head. “And what is that? Where did he go?”

“He probably slithered into whatever hole he came out of. Cormac will find him in a week or two. That has been his mission for over a hundred years. Find Aiden and keep him from descending completely into narcissistic madness. He’s not doing very well.

” He pulled in a long breath. “But before, when we were close, nothing could come between us.”

I tried to imagine them as children, laughing gleefully in a place now haunted by the truth.

“What Rory and Isla said is true,” I murmured. “You’re not a full vampire.”

He shook his head. “I’m not. My mother was human, so my brothers and I were born, not created. We aged normally—until we were about thirty. By then, we’d already been sent to England because people in our clan had noticed that my parents stopped aging.”

I bit my lip. His family had been sent to England for a practical reason, not some grand curse—neighbors with sharp eyes and too much time to talk.

He glanced at me before moving to the mantel and toying with a candleholder.

“My grandfather was the Ceann Cine, the elected chieftain. He sent my father to represent the clan as the Marquess of Dún Na Farraige. Centuries later, that was where I met Lady Isobel, when it was my turn to take over the position again.”

“To take it over again?” I asked, tilting my head.

He nodded. “First, it was my father, then Cormac, me, Aiden, and then Conall. We each took our turn, again and again, until we left for America.” I tried to comprehend what the centuries would have been like—each brother taking a turn like it was no different from passing down a set of keys, while I couldn’t imagine life stretching beyond a few more decades.

He drew in a long breath. “Briar, believe me—I tried to help Lady Isobel. The best I could do was save her from the gallows. I knew she was angry, but I didn’t realize she’d decided to kill Ashdowne herself. I would have stopped her, saved her.”

A spark of pride flared in my chest for Lady Isobel, even if her path had been bloody.

He turned to me, guilt clouding his face. “I should have avenged Harrowmont myself, but I hesitated. Briar, I’m so sorry.”

I tried to understand his apology, to connect the pieces, but the last piece… “How did we both end up in Byron Bay?”

He shook his head. “That I’m not sure of.

I checked on your family from time to time.

I ensured Isobel received a good position so that she could reclaim some part of her old life.

I assisted when your family needed it, but I tried to stay in the shadows.

I hadn’t looked for your family since your grandmother because I knew you were doing well.

I didn’t realize who you were when I came for the old man saltbush. ”

My stomach churned at the thought that my family’s survival hadn’t been luck but his guilt. “Did she love him?”

His face twisted. “What?”

“Did Isobel love her second husband?”

Lorcan smiled. “Not as much as Harrowmont. He was always her first love, but yes, she loved Fitzwilliam. And he treated her well. By then, I had learned my lesson and would have ended him myself had he not.”

I smiled faintly. “But if you had, I never would’ve met you.” It was the closest I could get to admitting my feelings for him.

His jaw tensed, and he struggled to speak. “Briar, I should’ve known pushing you away wouldn’t stop Aiden from trying to find you. It would not keep you safe. The safest place for you is with me—next to me.” He searched my eyes. “And it is where I want you to be.”

I swallowed hard. “You want me next to you?”

He bit his lip as he nodded. “Right with me. And I never want to let you go.”

My thoughts swirled in a chaotic mess. “You mean like Isla and Rory?”

Lorcan reached his hand out, hesitating before he laid it on my arm. “Briar, I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind since you left. And it had nothing to do with Aiden. I’d already fallen in love with you long before. But if this is all too much—if it’s not what you want—I understand.”

My pulse raced as I struggled to breathe, caught between disbelief and a wild, desperate kind of hope I didn’t want to feel. “But what about Aiden?” I whispered.

Lorcan shook his head. “You don’t have to worry about him. Even if you leave, I’ll watch over you. I’ll make sure no harm comes to you. But you’ll never see me.”

There was something beautiful and terrifying about knowing I’d have a shadow forever, even if I never saw him again. I smiled, the edges of it trembling. “You know, that’s kind of creepy, right?”

The corners of his mouth curled as his fingers brushed against my ear, just like they had in London, making my heart skip a beat. “You need to know—I’ve never been what most people would call an easy man to love. I take what I want. I take what’s mine. And if you stay, you will be mine.”

The possessiveness in his voice sent a shiver down my spine, yet not entirely from fear. “Until when?” I forced the question through my tight throat.

His smile deepened, though there was a vulnerability in it.

“Until you say the word. That’s the thing about being a mate.

You hold all the power over the bond. You decide if we stay together or part.

” He ran a finger down my neck and across my chest, hooking it in my shirt collar. “But everything else is mine.”